My Kind of Woman

34. State Of Dormancy

AN; Hello!! Last chapters reception was great, and I enjoyed reading all the comments. Some of them were hilarious, and others had some good "what happens next?" theories. Well, you'll find out now.. but the book is not over yet! There is more to come...
Enjoy!  : )

For a moment, everything in my body just stopped. The pumping of my heart, the flow of my blood, the growing and shrinking of my lungs, just stopped. My suddenly still body was rigid against the stale-smelling futon and the shell of my being was filled with the echoing sound of my lost thoughts. What do I say? What the hell do I say?

"Jesus, don't be silent, or I'll take it the wrong way," Jackie hissed impatiently.

I dragged my voice out from the depths of me. "Why do you think that?" It rasped, it strained, it was too obvious.

"A few weeks ago, you came to the house," she started, and I swallowed hard against my dry throat, "I was coming out the bathroom. I heard you talking to my mom - I didn't eavesdrop! Just found it odd - so I went back to my room, waiting for you to just come upstairs. But you didn't. I heard you leave. You both talked for a while. And with that, other things started to seem strange. Too much did."

I couldn't speak. The darkness of the room seemed thick and heavy, and it was beginning to suffocate me.

"Norah, what did she say to you?" Jackie asked sternly.

"Nothing," I said in a quiet voice.

I heard the bed sheets rustle as Jackie shuffled to sit up in bed. I was sure she was staring at me in the dark, but I couldn't bring myself to search for her face.

"You're lying. Why did you come? What did she say to you?" Jackie pressed, voice a little firmer then.

Everything I'd planned on saying had slipped from me. I was reaching into the void of my mind, fingers fumbling, clutching at nothing. There was nothing there. I hadn't prepared myself for these kinds of questions. There wasn't much I could reply with. What the hell do I say?

"Norah, come on. Why aren't you saying anything? Just tell me it isn't true, for fuck sake. Do you know how guilty you look right now?" Jackie was almost begging.

"I can't," I rasped.

"What? You can't what?"

"Lie."

Jackie went very silent for a minute. Her breath seemed to be the only sound in the room, coming in shallow, hard puffs. My heart was beating so hard I thought it would kill me. My anxiety had grown into nausea, making my stomach swirl and clench. Had I protected Mio? What could I say then that would? I'd have to tell her that she'd rejected me that day. That I'd come and told her that I was in love with her, that she'd pushed me away. Jackie didn't have a clue how Mio felt, did she?

Jackie barked out a harsh, humourless laugh. I think for a moment it was disbelief, a reaction to what she'd just processed.

"Get out."

My heart sank. "It's the middle of the night! Please, Jackie, I'm--"

"Get out! Get out! You fucking sicko out! Get out!" She'd leapt out of bed then and ripped the covers off of my body.

She didn't strike me, but I had expected her to. I crossed my arms over my face and jumped back so that I was pressed against the wall, cowering. Instead, she reached down and gripped me by the neck of my shirt, yanking it up, making the material stretch away from my chest. Then pulled the door open and shoved me out. I went bowling into the hall, back of my head slamming against the carpet. Jackie was rummaging through the room, looking for my bag and my uniform, which she then tossed at me, the weight of my bag making my gums rub against my teeth and tear slightly. My mouth tasted metallic.