sunflower 🌻, johnjae [ ✔ ]

author note:

okay not @ how i tried to make this book toy with people's emotions 🥵🥵
either way, i know that this ended a couple days ago. it's heartwarming to see how many of yous actually enjoyed my book! 💓
i think that if i wasn't so busy i would've extended the story a bit more, but i wanted to get at least one book off my chest and already knew that sunflower was close to its end.

for fun, i'll show you some of my rough ideas when i first started this book!

1. originally, i was going to end this with a worse ending, which was having doyoung actually disappear from sight. but i soon realised that there was enough angst in the book. he was bound to wind up dead because for some reason he always does 💀 and i also planned to either have johnjae's relationship still whole (while taeyong went into a depressive state about doyoung, therefore, jaehyun losing his two closest friends), or splitting them apart after doyoung dying/disappearing.

but you see, writing this would have been so difficult for me, i ended up scrapping it.

2. ten would have been an important character in here, to serve as johnny's friend who helped him (like how taeyong did with dojae). there was a segment in the story with mark, but it was just a chapter, and as well unimportant. i decided to scrap it because the idea popped into my head when most characters were introduced already and i didn't want to bombarde the readers with too many characters to focus on since the main characters were doyoung, johnny and jaehyun, with taeyong and nomin serving as supporting roles.

3. honestly, the original MAIN idea of this story was jaehyun just being a supportive 'straight' guy, who didn't want to admit being mlm/who actually didn't like guys, which lead to johnny being heartbroken. though, the three main still end up as friends. this concept sounds much better when you think about the ending of this book 🤡🤡

4. there was an ending i cut out, which was full on introducing a new character actually 👀 but i didn't see the point because i kinda liked the cliffhanger therapy session conversation. but, there are still some hints on who it was going to be in the last fewish chapters if you're eager.

now onto things i saw while browsing some comments 👀 and other random add-ons.

- why couldn't there be dotae?
when it comes to books and fiction, it's your own world and you get to do what you want. if i wanted to match every dude or every girl up, i would do so. however, in reality not everyone is well... into the same sex, if you understand. taeyong was doyoung's best friend (in highschool) and he'd been through so much with him. of course they were close, and some people might fancy that. but the two of them never saw each other as more than friends. either way, i wanted a supportive character who was able to sympathise with doyoung, even if never having experienced such things (as taeyong was portrayed as a cis, heterosexual male). plus, something about a gay guy and a straight guy's friendship always makes my heart burst.

for clarification (including supporting/minor charas):
doyoung (homosexual/gay)
johnny (bisexual/questioning)
jaehyun (bisexual)
taeyong (straight/hetero)
nomin (that's self explanatory)
markhyuck (that too)
taeil (straight/hetero 🥔)
ten (i'm not sure lol)
baekhyun (straight/hetero that's gayer that doyoung)
sehun (gay, i mean he's literally dating suho)
suho (gay, i mean he's literally dating sehun)
my cat (i'll wait for her to come out)

- johnjaedo?
if this wasn't aimed to be an angst (which is the rare case), this could've been a possible outcome. i do love johnjaedo as a whole, but this book was about a foreseen love triangle. not everyone ends up with who they want (doyoung for that matter). even so, they wouldn't have been in a poly relationship as johnny didn't have feelings for doyoung. as for doyoung and his past feelings for jaehyun (which was revealed), they were sure to recover if he wasn't so focused on him and johnny's relationship, or if he just didn't like johnny at all. jaehyun... his feelings... i cant spoil too much 🌚

- who's perspective is this book in?
although it's written in third person view most of the time, sometimes johnny's view (only with jaehyun); this book's protagonist was in fact, doyoung. i feel like doyoung was a character to empathise with as he was always on the rear end. especially because you guys, the readers, PROBABLY, realised his feelings for johnny before he himself could even. as well, we see a lot more about his character and persona than other characters. especially his relationships with taeyong and nomin, as they are deep and personal (which johnjae dont know much of).

- where's taeil?
this is cute hdhshdhs. to be honest, i don't exactly ship doil (i still think they're cute nonetheless hehe). in sunflower 🌻, he was mentioned a couple times but basically he's a dad with a wife and kids 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨 moon taeil living his best life while johnjaedo in some soap opera.

- inspiration?
i'm not sure really. i'm a sucker for writing angst and sometimes love triangles if i'm bothered. i enjoy writing in the instagram format so this was super fun (short too a little, that's why there's over 120+ chapters). ideas like to pop into my head from time to time so i can say i got inspiration from the way flowers wilt.

- what does the sunflower in every chapter's header mean?
the sunflower signifies whatever you want to believe! it could mean growth, a person's health/love, death, johnjaedo (+taeyong's) friendship, anything! i will say it's sad, though.

- will there be a sequel?
sadly, no. i do not intend to make a sequel. this is because 1. i think i've written enough about johnjae's relationship, and 2. what would it even be about? so many things to do... the only close thing i would have gotten for the sequel was drama between johnjae and/or doyoung finding a love interest. either way, i'm not sure. but.... there is something you can look forward to 👀

it's a prequel, lol, to be exact. um, i wasn't going to say anything and was going to literally scare y'all and publish it out of nowhere but i got too excited i wanted to say something asap 🌚 basically, all the prequel will cover up is dotae and dojae's relationship and other foreshadowed but unexplained stories that were showcased in sunflower 🌻 hehe. i feel like adding some cute side ships in there too. it's based seven to five years ago, when they were in highschool.

anyways, gotta blast. thank you so much again for reading and enjoying my book! 💓 please look forward to the prequel! if you have any questions please respond to this ^^ ily!