Intentions

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Intentions

Okay, everything is a bit too perfect in my life right now.

It's sketchy.

Knowing me something is bound to go horribly wrong. Or maybe God is rewarding me for being good.

Nah that doesn't sound right. God already rewards me by helping me stay alive. I'm being paranoid.

Nope, that doesn't sound right either. I've said I'm being paranoid too much in the past.

Oh wow. I- no.

No.

No.

No.

I pick up my phone and call the only person I know that will help me.

"It's been a while, Miss Aden."

"It's happening again," I say.

"You want me to open everything back up?"

I sigh. "Yes."

"Stop by at 4, I'll be waiting."

The line goes flat.

At 3:30 I call an Uber. I don't trust myself behind the wheel.

I make it to the complex and take the back door and walk upstairs.

I walk into room 3 and sit on the carpet.

"Madison, what's stressing you?"

I take a deep breath and let myself flow, "I am scared. Everything's too good right now, it's weird."

"How so?"

"My two best friends are amazing and they are both awaiting children. Then, I have this strange thing with a guy I barely know-"

I am cut off, "guy? Care to elaborate?"

"Wilson... his name is Wilson. I don't know if I can consider him a friend. He is ungodly gorgeous, and we bounce off each other really well. He's straightforward, though respectful. I know him but I don't know him. I don't know the facts, maybe that's my problem. I should ask about the facts."

"Sounds like you're falling for Wilson, but you are scared to. You still have yet to stop comparing every male that comes through your life to the child you thought you knew. The question is, do you want to fall for him?"

"The problem is I am falling for him. I don't know him! He is everything I look for in a male and this whole thing is sketchy." I stand in frustration.

"Miss Aden, this isn't an establishment where we get physical. I advise you to sit down and take a deep breath. I want you to think about Marq. He's always a topic that calms you down."

When I heard the name I immediately took a seat. I close my eyes. I picture the boy I had lost so long ago. I take a harsh breath.

"Slow."

I listen to my heartbeat, I let the pulsating feeling take over my body. I breathe out, very slow. I feel like that wavy transition in movies when they go into a character's dream. It's a soothing feeling.

"I'm sorry..."

"Never apologize for being yourself Madison."

"Do you think I should go with the flow?"

"I believe you already know what you want to do."

Correct... I need to let things happen and just cope with whatever outcome presents itself.

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