𝗺𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻

15

the festival sucked. i left ririka, i made out with yumeko and i 'accidentally' punched suzui after the festival. what kind of nonsense was that? i was furious but it still hurts.

she said she'll never leave me, but why?

damn liar.

it's my fault, my fault that i've always thought that no one would ever leave me. my goddamn fault for trusting her.

this shit hurts.

it's been 5 days since that has happened. yumeko and suzui have gotten popular and ririka has been spending more time with me since she's known that i've been hurting a lot.

"saotome, your coffee is gonna be cold."

"let it be cold, i could careless."

i put my head down and clenched my fists. idiot yumeko. she's so good at lying. her smile, eyes, lips, body ... everything about yumeko is pretty. even her stupid gambling addiction.

ririka patted my head while i was just full of anger. "i want her ..." i whined while looking up. ririka's face was just full of sadness, which concerned me a little. "you know, i'm the one that's supposed to be sad here, not you. idiot." i said as i grabbed her wrist to make her let go of my head. ririka chuckled and drank her coffee.

i wonder, why is ririka always in the president's shadow? the platinum older's life matters too. whatever, it's the president's fault for making ririka a shadow. plus, it's probably none of my business.

"saotome, i-i have to go..." ririka told me while getting up. i look up to see ririka's smile fade away as she bid me a goodbye. "hm, where are you go... nevermind." she left, not even caring about my question. i sighed and decided to look through social media since i needed some time by myself.

first, it was just a simple yumemi concert thing which brought me memories of yumeko being in a pretty dress and in pigtails. i couldn't help but blush at that moment since yumeko looked damn pretty.

i stumbled across a few pictures from different people from school until the next post i saw was suzui and yumeko.

"tch, bullshit."

i didn't bother looking through any of the posts and tried to ignore them as long as i can. more photos of anyone on school was filled in my feed but only yumeko and suzui's picture remained in my head.

the couple ... it gets me furious.

i don't like it.

i just don't.

i sighed and got up, leaving my coffee there. it was already the first week of december and it's hella cold. i didn't imagine my soon to be Christmas gift to end up like this.

heartbroken.

confused.

melancholy.

so many emotions, i can't control them. my heart hurts, my body keeps aching, i keep crying whenever i just get a random vision of yumeko in the middle of nowhere.

it's like a curse.

when yumeko leaves me, every part of her is in me ... hurting me so much.

i just want a break.

.

.

.

3 days later

"alright class, we have tests again tomorrow so make sure you guys study. have a great day everyone." my teacher said as everyone else dismissed. as soon as i was about to get up, i felt a back hug.

same one.

yumeko's back hug.

her arms wrapped around my waist, her legs being near mine, her husky breathe on the back of my neck ... that warmed my heart. i miss the hug. i miss everything about-

.

pfft what?

of course that wasn't real, that was just my imagination.

yumeko would never hug me, not after what happened. as i switched out my shoes and walked towards the exits, i saw the platinum masked hair girl just waiting for me. i scoffed and later gave her a nice headpat. "thank you ... for being by my side." i shyly said since i'm not used to thanking or complimenting people often.

she nodded and as both of us walked together, i saw yumeko and ryota just talking to each other at the school garden. as my fists clenched and my blood started boiling, ririka tapped my shoulder which she made me bring my attention to her.

"saotome-san, if you're that angry then don't look." ririka told me. i gritted my teeth and looked away like she told me to. "tch, let them be. i'm nowhere near caring about them." i scoffed while picking up my pace.

of course i care.

i just wanted to lie cause it felt awful seeing the person who i like being with someone else.

it felt like back then.

my heart being hit by a blade, shattering into tiny pieces.

—-

"saotome-san, i'll see you tomorrow." ririka smiled towards me as we both arrived at the train station. i waved a goodbye as i entered the station and gave her a fake smile.

just smile and wave.

as she turned around, i turned around as well and let my smile fade away. "this shit sucks ..." i whispered while entering the usual train i take. only this time, i felt like going somewhere else besides going home.

it's Friday anyways, so i need some peace for a while.

i was trying to think of somewhere to go ... no no, a place i visited without yumeko. it'll hurt me more if i go somewhere i went with the gambling freak. i tried thinking, thinking, and kept thinking.

"gah, i can't-"

suddenly, i had a great idea.

finally, a place i went without yumeko.

a sakura tree.

8:00 pm

"feels so nice ..." i awed. i felt the wind hitting me as i walked through the pathway in the area. it was dark but the moon was shining. i still kept walking, looking at every detail in the trees. the sakura leaves ... the most significant one.

it didn't take me long to realize that i've already arrived at the tree.

"woah, it still looks the same."

the tree never grew, i wasn't disappointed though. i still remember her.

"tsuzura... the tree is still alive. i hope you still remember it." i said towards the tree, acting like as if it's tsuzura. this is so awkward. what the hell am i thinking?

IT'S A DAMN TREE.

i sighed as i walked away but gave the tree one last look. a solemn one.

"just so you know~ i've fallen in love with someone else."

there.

i finally walked away and truthfully accept the fact that i'm over her.

my only problem is that ... the person who i love already has someone else.

ouch.