【 OLD VERSION 】
You can find the rewritten version through my profile :)
❝ Ｄｉｄ ｙｏｕ ｊｕｓｔ ｇｒｏｗ ａ ｆｕｃｋｉｎｇ ｃａｃｔｕｓ ｏｎ ｍｙ ａｓｓ? ❞
➪ ⁱⁿ ʷʰⁱᶜʰ ᵃ ᵍᵃᵐᵉʳ ᵍⁱʳˡ ᵐᵉᵉᵗˢ ᶜˡᵃˢˢ 1ᵃ.
*this is literally the first fanfiction i've ever written, that alone speak volumes...
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A TWO-PACK NON-GMO EXTRA EXTRA SPICY HOT, hot sauce and a bag of bell peppers.
Nothing more and nothing less. The blonde porcupine boy expected for a quick trip down the street to pick up the groceries, but instead came home empty-handed with a pricked hand and a pair of ruined shorts.
And possibly a crush.
He was thankfully spared by his old hag's lectures, saved by the obvious bulging cactus that found its home comfortably smacked quite literally in the middle of one of his butt cheeks.
"Welcome home brat, did you get the hot sau—" Her eyes were quickly stolen by the huge plant behind him, almost dropping her plates she was washing in bewilderment.
"No."
"Is thats a—"
"Yes it is, and I don't want to talk about it," he replied, before stomping into his room and slamming the door behind him hastily.
Walking home with that thing was a full humiliation and a half, the number of stares he got was beyond embarrassing. It made him realise just how many people he walks by each day, which by the way, was a lot.
He tried to save his face by glaring at every stare he received, but he knew that whoever got a glimpse of this horrific but still hilarious sight, will have this scene burned in their eyes for the rest of their life.
To be honest, if he saw a random dude walking home with a cactus on his ass, he too would be laughing and maybe even take pictures of that clown. It's not every day that you'd see that around, in your city nonetheless.
The next thing you know, he could be written down in a novel as a bedtime story for the rest of the generation to laugh at. Oh, how he wishes this was all just a nightmare.
Or does he?
Never in a million years would he think that he'd fall for someone so stupidly with just one glance. Things like 'love at first sight' were both considered childish and completely foolish to someone like him. And it seems like that thought turned around to bite his ass in the end.
Talking about his ass, he wouldn't have ever thought that with one trip to the grocery store would ever cause him to end up with a bruised ass, bruised from a slap nonetheless. And who would have thought he would be slapped by his newly formed crush on the same day they first met.
Not really the most romantic thing ever, but still memorable.
Now just what happened exactly that lead him to where he is right now, daydreaming about a girl, ass, or should I say cactus up, on the bed?
