The Lies You Tell

Bʀᴇᴀᴋ ᴜᴘ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ

" We bound to break up anyway! We bump heads too much! It ain't like you happy here! 
Briel had the audacity to say.

" Okay well we can break up since that's how you feel! Not thinking I would agree.

* Call Ended*

People interpret things differently, I never in a million years thought we'd get to this point!
Why did I agree to breakup if its not what I truly wanted? I've called! I've texted! She won't respond!
When we're good ,we're great! But if we're bad it's a massacre, to understand what you have, you have to lose it! If it comes back then maybe it's for you!

I tried to continue my day, but it just don't feel right!
Any and everything i do it remains me of Briel.
Love has never been my strong topic. I run from what loves me the most and stick to what I'm use to.
Is it a crime to have a wall up?
Before getting into a relationship understand you need self worth!
Rather you have a person or you're single.

As the sunsets, Briel comes home

I hear the keys in the door, so I turn pandora up on my Samsung surround sound.

-Jhené Aiko - While Were Young plays -
" Baby while were young!🎶
I think we should do something crazy!
Like say fuck everyone!
And just run from the daily...
routine!
Yea you know what I mean 🎶
Telling everybody you're mine and I like it
And I really hope you don't mind.
I can't fight it!🎶

Briel walks in.
Probably thinking I'm mad as usually
But I'm over it at this point.
I love her it's just hard for me to show it.
Everybody I run into isn't so perfect!
The bad always comes before the good..
So to have someone who cherish me..
It's hard to accept!
All good things come to a end...
at least that's how I was taught.

Of course her stubborn ass wanna talk!
Cause she hungry, tired and smell food
I rolled my eyes as she walk towards me..
"We talking now?! Or you still with the bullshit?"

Briel quickly responds
"T I love you! I just don't feel like you love me!
I put my all into this, you could careless if we're together or not... I can't be with a person that don't love me like I love them!"

For some reason this girl knew me.
Like inside and out! She could tell me my feelings without me EVER expressing them..

"I do love you! I just dunno how to show it!
I'm not use to someone like you
I never had a Mrs.Right
My Guard been up my whole life!
You know the issue with my daddy!
And my mama! You've been around Briel!"

I never showed weakness. My momma always taught me play them before they play you, if they don't have nothing to offer, why be with Em'
when you grow up around certain things you eventually grow up to be that..
is it possible to break that cycle ?

"I know what you been through T! But does that justify why you gotta treat me wrong? Why be in a relationship if you're not ready for one? If I didn't break it, why do I have to fix it?"

Briel knew what she wanted, she was the only girl I ever dated to express how she felt! She was just too good to be true.. so good that I'll start shit just to see how she reacted, to see if she loved me even when she was mad.. Although her anger was so much to deal with, she never stopped loving and supporting me. I knew if NOBODY was there, she was.

I don't wanna hurt her, I knew she worshipped the grown I walked on, god knows I love her, she just don't feel it! Then It hit me all at once,
my homegirls pray for someone like this and I'm taking it for granted..
Will I be good enough for her?
Will she ever realize I'm trying?

"Briel I'm really trying, I don't purposely do you wrong! I am ready for a relationship! I love you!"
My eyes filled with pain

" If you love a person you'll show them!
Actions speak louder than words!
How long you think ima wait on you T?"
Briel was dishing out so much love,
love that she never received..

We didn't immediately get back together,
We lived together so it didn't take long...
But things Changed.