40. unexpected comfort

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After crying for two days, I texted the one person I never thought I would

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After crying for two days, I texted the one person I never thought I would. The only person I could talk to that would understand what I was going through.

I had talked to Sage, Liam, and Nate on separate occasions and none of them were particularly helpful at getting my mind off of Nicholas. They were all biased towards the two of us, being both of our friends. Every single one of them tried to convince me it would be a good idea to call Nicholas and try to talk again. I nodded and told them I would think about it, but I knew there was nothing left to say that could salvage the broken pieces.

"I have to say, I was really surprised to get a text from you asking to talk. I'll be honest, when I apologized a while back it was mostly because my father had made me but—" I knew by the way she stopped moving, talking, and maybe even breathing, that she had taken in my disheveled appearance curled up in a ball on the couch. "What happened?"

I shook my head, unable to form a full sentence yet.

"Was it Nick?" She asked hesitantly, while slowly sitting down next to me on the couch.

While I couldn't get an answer out, the sound of my small sob when she said his name clearly must've tipped her off.

"Oh God," she said, shaking her head, obviously slightly unsure of what to say.

"My heart is broken," I said, voice raspy and barely understandable from all of my crying. I had to bit my lower lip to keep tears from flooding out. Kate looked like she was debating reaching out to give me a hug, but was unsure of how that would be received on my end.

We probably sat in silence, her unsure what to say and me unable to get a single word out of my mouth, for thirty minutes. Finally, the tears stopped flowing. Not because I was done crying, but because I think I had cried so long there were none left.

"You want to tell me what happened now?" Kate looked at me, her eyebrow raised trying to put on an indifferent mask, but I could still see the look of pity in her eyes.

Despite that, I told her everything. I told her about the contract and our fake relationship. I told her about Ben and the wedding. I explained the trip we took to Alexandria and about our real relationship. And finally, I told her about the engagement and our subsequent breakup.

"Wow, you two have been through a lot," Kate said, coming to terms with everything I had just told her. "I'm sorry I added to that burden."

After my monologue to her, all I could do was nod my head.

"And you believed him when he said it was all for business and that he didn't love you?" She looked at me disbelieving.

"No," I shook my head, looking up at Kate. "But that doesn't mean it didn't hurt hearing him say it."

"I knew he was dumb, I didn't know he was an idiot too," Kate said, shaking her head in incredulity.

"That makes no sense," I said with a soft smile. The first emotion I'd expressed all day aside from sadness.

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