When We Meet Again

Chapter 27: Fear Eats the Soul

"Hiccup, breathe, it's alright."

"She just ran away from me Heather, it's not alright!"

Hiccup was pacing back and forth about Heather's room. He had dropped Toothless home before making his way to the doughnut shop and then the hospital, which meant the service dog wasn't there to help his master calm down. Hyperventilating Hiccup gripped at his hair as Dagur followed him back and forth, trying his best to replace Toothless' absence. Heather could just watch on from her bed in pain as her best friend broke down before her eyes.

"Brother please stop torturing yourself, everything's fine," Dagur pleaded as he gripped Hiccup's raised arms tightly in an attempt to stop him from pulling on his hair and moving. Thankfully he stopped moving, although it didn't help him with his incoming panic attack.

At that moment, Dr Mala stepped into the room for Heather, who immediately noticed Hiccup trembling, panting heavily and sweating. She immediately dropped her clipboard and grabbed Hiccup from Dagur, making him focus on her.

"Hiccup? Look at me. Both eyes on me." Hiccup lifted his eyes filled with fear to meet Mala's. "Follow my breathing pattern, you will be alright."

As he gradually calmed down, she brought him to the small couch to sit and rest. He was still trembling a little and his hands were freezing cold, but his breathing had slowed down to a regular pace. Mala gave him a glass of water to sip from before turning to Dagur and Heather on the opposite side of the room.

"It was Astrid, wasn't it?" she asked softly, making sure Hiccup couldn't hear their conversation.

Both siblings nodded slowly as they eyed the young man staring into blank space out the window. "How did you know?" Dagur asked Mala slowly.

"I saw her running out the door and down the corridor, she didn't notice me and seemed focused on something else," Mala replied before turning back to Hiccup.

"Hiccup, I advice you to go home and get some rest. Heather will be alright with us, you need to take care of yourself too," Mala spoke as she approached him, who just nodded once in reply. She turned back to the Berserker siblings. "Dagur, you should walk him home and tell the others about what happened. Make sure he gets back safely. Don't worry about Heather, you can return whenever you want to. Also make sure he gets to his dog as soon as he reaches home."

Heather encouraged her brother to help Hiccup home when he searched her face for approval. Dagur helped Hiccup stand up before saying goodbye to Mala and Heather.

Both young men didn't speak a word as they walked back to Hiccup's apartment which was thankfully just a few minutes away. Occasionally Dagur glanced at Hiccup to check if he was alright, although his pale face remained unreadable.

Suddenly Hiccup spoke. "She knows I still love her huh?"

"What?"

Hiccup scoffed. "I'm such a fool. I shouldn't have treated her so nicely, I shouldn't have pretended everything was alright, I shouldn't have left her all those years ago. Now she hates me."

"Woah buddy slow down," Dagur said as he gripped Hiccup's shoulders, shaking him a little as if to waking him up from a daze. "Astrid does not know, and I think from this day forth she would probably be secretly happy to know you still feel for her. She doesn't hate you, I can tell that. She's just... confused. With a lot of things."

"Then explain why she ran away from me like that."

Dagur chuckled nervously without a smile. "Oh uh you see, before you came Heather and I kinda pushed her really hard to get her to realise that she was still in love with you. The moment you came in sort of rang a bell in her head, and fear probably spread through her entire body as memories of your breakup came back to her. That's mine and Heather's fault, we pushed her a bit too much," Dagur explained as gently as he could. "I know she still loves you, she's just... afraid."

Hiccup sighed. "I'm afraid too. I'm always afraid," he whispered softly as tears started filling his eyes. "I don't want to lose her a second time, I want to be there for her like how we always were."

"You see? It's all fear. You're both scared. It's all mental torture, and look what it's done to you, practically engulfed you whole. The Hiccup I knew was always optimistic, now fear has made him a coward and submissive." Dagur crossed his arms as Hiccup wiped his eyes. "But when I saw you with Astrid in the past weeks, I had never seen you happier ever since you... moved in with Gobber," he said while trying to avoid mentioning his accident or father's death. "You complete each other. You need her and she needs you, but she's confused and also afraid. Afraid of getting her heart broken again."

Hiccup nodded faintly as he stared at the trees swaying in the cool breeze behind Dagur. Silence fell between them as Dagur turned to watch the scenery Hiccup was gazing at. After a few moments he sighed and looked back at Hiccup.

"Look, what you two need to do is talk it all out. She doesn't know why you left her, you don't know how she feels and what had happened to her over the years. It's time to break the barriers." Dagur hesitated for a moment before continuing. "Although not anytime soon, it's better to let things calm down for a while."

Hiccup simply nodded again before starting to walk, forcing Dagur to remain silent and follow him. When the finally reached the apartment, Toothless immediately ran to his owner, jumping about him as he tried to show his love for Hiccup. The distressed auburn haired boy sat on the sofa and stroked Toothless, falling into a daze in his own thoughts.

"I'll go talk to Fishy and Snothat," Dagur said before knocking on a door and disappearing into the room where Snotlout and Fishlegs were doing homework together. Hiccup remained on the couch, staring blankly at the floor as he stroked his dog. He slipped his other hand absentmindedly into his shirt where he pulled out a golden locket hiding beneath his clothes. He gazed at its small heart before opening it and staring at the photos within with teary eyes.

His eyes fell on the particular photo where he kissed Astrid's cheek in the photo booth with her grinning adorably in his eyes. Tears started to fall again as he relived their happiest memories together.

"I love you, milady. I'm sorry."

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A/N:
Dang, there's been loads of tears shed in the last few chapters huh😂 Maybe I should give their eyes a break...