One shots

You're Cold

"If you love me for what you see,
only your eyes would be in love with me.
If you love me for what you've heard,
then you would love me for my words.
If you love my heart and mind,
then you will love me for all I'm.
But if you don't love my every flaw,
then you mustn't love me-not at all."
-Lang Leav.

Alia felt like absolute shit. Her head felt heavy, playing a horrible game of killing her softly through a headache that just wouldn't go away. At least she didn't look that bad. She winced, the lie did nothing to make her feel any better. If she was honest she probably looked worst than how she was feeling. Her eyes were still rimmed red from another battle of not going to cry last night. Which she lost miserably.

Not only did she have dark circles from being up for more than half the night, her eyes were puffy, she wouldn't be surprised if people asked her if she could see. And instead of helping conceal the problem like concealer was meant to, it seemed to highlight the slight issue she was having. The small amount of blusher she had on made her feel like she was a clown. With the crying, lack of sleep and eating she was also looking on the paler side. Her lipstick looked horrible due to her chapped lips, so she stuck to chapstick for the day. Not that it was going to be much of a day.

And for the first time ever, she was going to take advantage of chill Friday's. Alia never dressed casually, in all seven years of working for the company. She was known to be in business attire, and you could distinctly tell when she was coming towards you from the familiar sound of her stiletto heels. To hell with it she thought to herself. Looking through her jeans she pulled a pair of white wide legged jeans. Her favourite pair they said snuggly high waisted. With summer ending and autumn coming in she opted for a cropped cami underneath a sage green cardigan, that fell off her shoulder just how she liked it. She buttoned it up, the frayed edges sticking out. The deep v cut let sneak peeks of the lacey top through.

Satisfied she through on a pair of ankle boots, her mama's necklace and father's ring on her with the family crest on her pinky finger. Her hair was matte and slightly greasy. But she didn't care a single bit. Feeling she couldn't give more of a shit than she already was she didn't brother brushing it. She brushed through her brown locks with her fingers to what she thought was acceptable enough to look like messy waves. Her hair was always up in a bun, not a single hair ever out of place. But today she couldn't give a flying fuck.

Heart break really brought something out of her she realised.

Carsten had been getting the dirty looks of disappointment for a week now. A week since she walked out using her days off for the first time without having to be forced. Even then Lia never would, you could always count on her being near him. Being there for him. For seven years she had been his right hand, her smile what got him to get out of bed in the morning, knowing she'd be at her desk waiting for him. For seven years knowing she would put him in his place kept him humble and clear headed. For seven years just knowing she wasn't too far from him put his head and heart to peace.

And now he was suffocating, trying to rationalise his decision was the right call. And feeling like he is barely coasting by in life, alive but not living at all because he missed her and her light. He ran a hand over his face tired, the last words he said to her played through his mind. He had to let her go, even if he would be stuck inside the memories he shared with her. Even though he shouldn't have said what he did.  He held onto the silver of hope that grounded him that she'd be here today. He missed her, the ache in his chest eating away at him. And it had only been three days, how was he going to survive forever when she was to be transferred out to next week?

The elevator doors opened to his floor. He heard the silent whoosh of the other elevator doors close as he stepped out paying no attention to the sound or who was in there. She was going to be here today, he chanted in his head like a mantra. He didn't look into the office space. Could feel the cold icy stares and insufferable silence the second they caught him. His friends were giving him the third degree and it was eating at him. Slowly but surely. He walked around the bend to his suite stopping short. She wasn't there. The same woman who had never taken a day off before hadn't been back for three days and it was his fault. He felt the frustration rise as he stoically walked pass and into his room. He spanned the room, there were too many memories of her in here. It was like being stuck with the ghost of her, her smile, the countless times she fell asleep on his couch, her smell, vanilla and coconut. He didn't think twice before moving to swipe off half his desk, when a single white envelope stuck out.