Chapter 17

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THROUGHOUT THE DRIVE, I can sense Herson glancing at my way

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THROUGHOUT THE DRIVE, I can sense Herson glancing at my way. He didn’t ask me what I was doing in the precinct, he just hugged me for a while until my tears dried up.  

Now sitting on the shotgun, staring into the streets we passed by—I tried to get everything off my mind. However the words of Inspector Corpuz kept on replaying, as if trying to mess with me even when I know I am completely innocent.

“Baby…” he called. “Do you really wanna go home?”

His voice put my thoughts into a halt. Looking outside, I noticed we were nearing Avida Towers. If I go into my unit…I’ll see Fia’s unit too.

Alam ko namang wala akong kasalanan sa pagkamatay niya. Pero siguradong hindi ako papatulugin ng isip ko, babalik at babalik lahat nang nangyari sa presinto.

“Dekko?”

I sighed. “I don’t want to.”

That was all he needed to hear to turn his car around. It didn’t take long before the car stopped moving. When I looked outside, I wasn’t surprised when I saw the familiar dancing fountain.

Reminiscing the first time we were here brought a small smile to my lips. It abruptly left my face when a girl with same built as Fia passed by.

Katulad ng dati ay doon ulit kami naupo sa may bandang harap ng fountain. Maybe the various colors help distract our minds from drowning in our own thoughts. Or it could be the noise of the kids playing.

Katahimikan ang namayani sa aming pagitan. Ramdam kong gustong malaman ni Herson kung ano bang nangyayari pero pinipigilan niya ang sariling magsalita. Gusto niyang kusa akong magsabi.

Nang bigla siyang tumayo ay sinundan ko lamang siya ng tingin. Naaliw akong panoorin siyang bumibili ng dirty ice cream habang nakapalibot sa kaniya ang ilang mga bata. May isa pa ngang kumapit sa kaniyang pantalon, gusto kong tumawa nang makita ang gulat sa kaniyang mukha pero hindi ko magawa.

Saglit lang ay nakabalik siya dala ang dalawang ice cream, chocolate flavor. Katulad pa rin ng dati. Ako kaya…makakabalik pa ba ako sa dati ‘pag natapos ang lahat ng ito?

In the midst of eating ice cream, I finally mustered the courage to ask him. “Herson, do you think I’m a bad person?”

He looked taken aback for a second. “No. You’re the kindest person I’ve met.”

“But why do I feel like I am? Why do I feel responsible for her death?” Frustration laced my voice as I put into words what’s been bugging me for hours now.

Hindi mawala sa isip ko ang litratong nakita ko kanina, iyong grills ng balcony ni Fia na mayroong butas. Naalala ko bigla ‘yung mga tunog na naririnig ko kapag gabi, at kapag tinatanong ko siya ay palagi niyang sinasabi na pusa lang ‘yon.

May hinala na akong may kakaiba roon pero pinili kong paniwalaan si Fia. I chose to believe her because I didn’t want to think that someone’s trying to break into her unit. I didn’t want to be scared and now that I think of it, maybe Fia really lied to me.

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