back to you |t.k|

four

The party, to Taehyung's dismay, seems to be going amazing. He'd contemplated not going because it feels pathetic but Minjae and Jihan had given him the judgemental eyes and he wouldn't see the end of it.

It's a casual house party, lively enough to get everyone up on their feet. He'd seen familiar faces when he first came but none had been familiar enough to initiate a conversation with. It makes sense; Jimin was never in his friend group back in college anyway, which surprised him that he'd be in Jeongguk's life.

Then again, he hasn't been part of Jeongguk's life in the past year or so. 

He hates that.

Both Minjae and Jihan have disappeared halfway through the party, to god knows where, but they're adults so Taehyung doesn't look for them just yet. He downs his fifth cup of fruit punch because getting drunk isn't part of the plan and he'd hate to stumble upon Jeongguk and mess up what he'd planned to say. And he has plans. He'd rehearsed it.

Except he doesn't find Jeongguk; not in the living room, or the kitchen, or even the pool area where everyone is already diving into the water to swim. He has a second's worth of suspicion that Jeongguk could be upstairs since it is Jimin's house.

Taehyung ends up sitting on the couch, pondering his decisions and waiting to see if Minjae and Jihan would appear or if Jeongguk would show up. He wonders if it's possible to be intoxicated on sugar because he feels a little lightheaded now.

"Taehyung?" 

He looks up only to see Jeongguk standing by the couch, a smile on his lips and the damn red cup in his hand. Taehyung's head spins just a little when he moves a little too quickly to give room for Jeongguk to sit. Jeongguk sits down with a sigh, leaning back.

"Alright?"

Their eyes meet and Jeongguk nods. 

"Just tired. I think I might head home soon."

"Alone?", Taehyung asks, clearing his throat.

Jeongguk smiles.

"I could ask Taeil."

"Don't.", Taehyung is quick to say but quicker to collect himself. "I mean, like, I can take you home. Your home, I mean. I can send you home."

The smile on Jeongguk's lips falters then, his face falling. Taehyung panics for a moment. He'd already forgotten everything he'd wanted to say, mesmerized by the sight of Jeongguk now, black hair fluffed up to expose his forehead and wearing a pair of black jeans to match his striped black shirt.

"Why are you doing this, Taehyung?", Jeongguk asks, looking up to meet Taehyung's eyes. His own are wide and sad and Taehyung hates it.

Taehyung frowns.

"Doing what?"

Jeongguk looks at him as if he'd just said something ridiculous. Taehyung clamps his mouth shut, afraid anything else he says might ruin everything. Jeongguk is rarely annoyed but Taehyung knows whenever he is. And right now, he is.

"Jihan told me why you're here.", Jeongguk says, sounding exhausted. Taehyung makes a mental note to maybe strangle Jihan later. "You're saying your sudden appearance back in my life is by chance?"

"No. It's by choice.", Taehyung admits aloud and quickly adds when he sees Jeongguk rolling his eyes. "And I know how this sounds but hear me out. You know I never wanted it to happen. I know I fucked up and that's why we broke up but I didn't want that. I know you didn't want that either."

Jeongguk's gaze lifts to meet his again. They're wide and sad and they hold galaxies, Taehyung thinks. If the stars had feelings, he knows they'd be envious of those pretty, pretty eyes. He'd missed looking into them. He'd missed Jeongguk.

For a moment, the silence stretches on, despite the music that continues to play throughout the house. Jeongguk clenches his jaw, sighing softly before he turns to look at Taehyung once again.

"You need closure?", Jeongguk asks and he doesn't let Taehyung speak as he continues. "Here's closure. We had our good times and most of them are good times and I'll always remember them as good. You got carried away and we drifted. That's life, isn't it, Taehyung? It happens. Everything happens for a reason."

Taehyung frowns. "What are you saying?"

"It's just.", Jeongguk sighs again. "There must be a reason why we separated in the first place."

"Yeah, because life got in the way but I'm back, Jeongguk. And I'm staying."

The younger's wide eyes sparkle with unshed tears, he looks like a kicked puppy and Taehyung wants to hold him. 

"I don't know, Taehyung."

He parts his lips but quickly decides it's better to rationalize his thoughts before he blurts them out. Taehyung sighs, pushing his hair back as he rearranges his phrase in his head. 

"I just have one question."

Jeongguk looks at him again before he nods his head once, prompting Taehyung to continue.

"If the time is right and nothing is in the way.", Taehyung says carefully, afraid of the answer but desperate for one.

"Would you give me that chance?"

Something flashes in Jeongguk's eyes, his expression softened and there's a twitch at the corner of his lips that betrays his straight face. Taehyung watches him and he watches Taehyung. At that moment in time, Taehyung couldn't think of a single reason why they shouldn't be together.

"You know there's only space for you in my heart, Taehyung.", Jeongguk says, driving all the life under Taehyung's skin, despite how sad he sounds. It only makes Taehyung want to do better. "If there is ever a chance for us to start again, I'd go back to you in a heartbeat." 

Taehyung's lips part to speak but Jeongguk isn't done. He holds a hand up to stop Taehyung from interfering, his smile kind and when his fingers brush over Taehyung's cheek in a soft caress, it feels like fireworks going off against the night sky. Taehyung is a lost cause. All he wants is Jeongguk.

"I think we need more time.", Jeongguk adds, breaking Taehyung's heart just a little but he clings onto the hope that it comes with. "I think that'd be good. For the both of us."

Taehyung disagrees but he nods anyway. When Jeongguk stands up, he follows him, out until they're in the driveway while the party goes on behind them. Taehyung's heart is beating a mile a minute. He doesn't want Jeongguk to go but he understands that he needs to.

It's when Jeongguk turns to leave that Taehyung decides to speak. 

"Will you let me court you then?"

Jeongguk laughs halfheartedly, turning back to look at him. 

"It's not the nineteenth century, Taehyung."

"You let me court you before."

This time Jeongguk's smile is fond and, Taehyung dares to say, maybe a little shy. He nods, laughing again when Taehyung's smile widens into a full-beam before he gives a little wave. Goodbye, for now.

When Minjae and Jihan find him, Taehyung no longer wants to strangle them and instead treats them to dinner.