psycho | tk

십이

the idle night found the two killers lying quietly in bed together. it was a rare moment of silence amongst their games of murder and mayhem. it was as if under the sheets, they were reminded they were mortal, too. 

from jungkook's spot, he could see the moon from the window. he wondered how many secrets it was keeping from him.

"do you think we're bad people?" taehyung asked softly.

"yes," jungkook replied with no hesitation.

taehyung was silent, almost as if he wanted another answer.

"but so is everyone else," jungkook continued. "just because they don't have the guts to kill doesn't mean they're good people. no, they're far worse."

"life is a game, taehyung, and everyone's playing it. some more serious than others. it's just a constant game of people playing each other, and if you're unlucky, you get eliminated. that's all there is to it. you should know that."

taehyung did know that. he knew jungkook loved the game, loved it more than anything. but taehyung had played, and he had already won — or so he thought.

he was at the top of the food chain, and yet the game never seemed to end, never taking any winners. so how exactly do you win a pointless game that never ends?

"life is a game," he repeated to himself.

jungkook stared up at the ceiling like it was a fountain of dreams, "and we're fucking killing it." his lips curled up slightly into an unseen smirk.

"yeah," taehyung whispered.

a moment of tainted silence elapsed.

"don't you sometimes wonder what it would be like to be normal?" he asked quietly, his voice uncharacteristically shaky. the big star seemed so small then, curled up underneath his blankets, eyes wide as he stared into the darkness.

it was an absurd question for an equally absurd person.

what a sight it was — to see the vulnerability that danced in his murderous eyes. without the dripping blood and power-hungry stares, he looked almost angelic in the moonlight.

"why would we want to be?" jungkook asked, turning to his side to look at him. he ran his fingers through taehyung's tousled hair.

normal was the first challenge of the game. if you fell for it, you'd find yourself in a trap where you chased your own tail in circles, constantly trying to find the one thing normality promised — sanity.

but many met their ends trying to find it.

like yerin, who blindly practiced corrupted law that couldn't protect her. or nayeon, who chased naïve dreams she'd never reach. or jihyun, who fought for an honorable morality that abandoned him in abandoned streets. or even donghoon, who sought pleasure in companionship he didn't understand.

those who overcame this trap played the rest of the game by their own rules. to be normal was to be restrained.

"normal is boring, and you know how much i detest the boring," jungkook said sweetly.

taehyung smiled softly as he pulled him on top of his bare chest. "i know it all too well." he leaned in to capture his lips. gently, quietly, but desperately.

he pulled away and gazed at jungkook, those gradient eyes flickering with something foreign.

he stretched out his long, delicate fingers and ran them along jungkook's neck. slowly, he brought his hand up to his temple, brushing aside a few loose strands of hair. slowly, he moved exploring fingers further back, cupping his skull in a firm grasp.

he was hyper-aware of every nerve ending in his fingers. he felt everything. every skin cell in contact with jungkook was screaming, no, singing.

in the darkness, taehyung wasn't a monster.

in the darkness, he dreamed of things he didn't dare dream of in the day. he touched jungkook in ways he didn't dare touch him under the light. he kissed him like he was scared to lose him.

jungkook smiled back at him, his hand drawing invisible patterns down his skin.

in the darkness, he couldn't see the bittersweet end to their gruesome beginning.