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Beatrice POV

I had just finished cleaning Charles room for Constance when I heard shouting downstairs. I am terrified to what I saw when I walked into the kitchen. I have been in small family fights with my mother and father before, but I have never seen anything like this. Julian was acting mad, Constance was trying to smile her way through the pain, Merricat was fighting back the tears and Charles was very, very angry. And that is what scared me most. He was so gentle and caring towards me and Constance. I knew there was a grudge somewhere with Merricat and him. But I didn't think it was that strong.

The way Charles's voice boomed through the kitchen made the walls vibrate with hatred and anger! When Merricat ran, Constance did as well. Knowing Merricat, she went to her Garden. Constance went to the study. She had books kept in there, and her memories of her mother. I didn't have anywhere to run right now. Uncle Julian was having a fit, and was a rambling mess at his desk by the window. Charles had a scowl on his face and turned to look at me. We made eye contact and he said "Did you know about this?" I shook my head. I truly did know nothing about it. He slowly stalked towards me like a wolf looking at a helpless sheep stuck on some barbed wire. I moved back one step with every one he took. He loomed above me and gently put his callused hand on my soft cheek. He wiped the tear drop lingering below my eye. I leaned into his touch ever so slightly without realizing it. He said "Dinner will be soon. Wear something... blue."

A confused look took over my face. He took note of this and took it upon himself to elaborate. "I would like to have a sight for sore eyes tonight. You, are my sight for sore eyes." Feelings of joy and overwhelmingness came over me. Confusion still having its place in my brain, I slowly nodded. A small smile appeared on his lips as his eyes roamed over my face. He said quietly "Go. You don't have much time to get ready. Constance has already made the main course." I bit the inside of my cheeks trying not to let more tears go as he acted as if nothing happened. I agreed with what he said. I guess I will be wearing blue tonight.

He exited the kitchen, and most likely went to his room. My feet were stuck to the ground. So much had happened in the last few moments that I don't even know what to think. There is a switch of some sort in his demeanor when he looks at me. One moment he's angry with Merricat, the next he is calm. But there is a look in his eyes when he glances at me. It is a look that I can't quite put a name on. There is one thing that I can tell for sure. He is lustful. He is wanting something that I can't give him. If it is me he wants it from. I don't know what it is. What am I thinking? Its not me. Nothing is about me. It's never about me. I dont want it to be about me. Im nothing but a burden to people. What would he want from me? What would he want from me?

The tears begin spilling from my eyes and onto my dress. I slid down the door wrapping my arms around my legs as I try to become as small as possible. Uncle Julian heard my small sniffles, and hiccups coming from the door way. He rolled his way over to me and said "Oh my dear Beatrice. What has got you so distraught?" I look up at him and I say nothing. I sit up on my knees and carefully lay my head on his lap. He softly places his hand on my back and rubs it up and down to try to comfort me. He says "You needn't worry about the past Beatrice. I should be telling myself that dont you think?" He chuckles to himself. I lift my head and chuckle a little as well. He looks me in the eye and says "Keep your head up. You can be happy, I know you can." I nodded and stood up. I wiped the tears away confidently and leaned down to give him a small peck on the cheek. He pat my shoulder and said "Join me for a walk my dear?" I nodded and we both made our way outside.

During the walk, I was able to get more familiar with all of the little things that were built, or grown on the Blackwood property. I learned that the trees planted across the court yard were planted by my great, great-grandfather. Julian thinks they are a little crooked. But I think they are beautiful no matter how they stand. The pond was dug up in 1872 by one of Julians great grandfathers, the road was built along with the house in 1868. And the gate that held it all closed was build no more than 10 years ago by the John Blackwood himself. I didn't think much of it, but I infer that it had something to do with money. Maybe he did just want it all to himself? I'm not positive, and I am glad I didn't know him to find out. I shook off that thought and turned my attention back to the walk. I enjoyed walking with Julian. Hearing him talk about his family, and his wife was very enlightening. It was warming to know that he once had a love of his life at one point. I wonder how beautiful she was before she passed away that night. That night that I have heard so much about. The dinner that ended a whole Generation of Blackwood's.

Speaking of dinner,  I figured dinner was soon so I wrote to Uncle Julian, 'Do you think we should go back inside for dinner?' He read the note and looked up at me. "Oh yes. We shouldn't make Constance wait. I hear she prepared roast lamb... Such a beautiful meal she has cooked in the past." He was thinking back on the dinner just as I was. We all have to think about more positive things. We all need to know what it is like to be happy. I was happy to be inside right now, there is one thing. I am happy to have two lovely sisters and an uncle who care for me, a house to live in, a diner owner who I love as a mother, and im happy to be alive. There are probably a lot of other things that I can be happy for, but there is just a couple to start with.

I walked upstairs keeping my eyes lowered to the ground. Up one flight... up two flights... up the third. I walked past Charles closed door, then Constances, and finally came to my door. I walked into the room lit only by a small lamp on the bedside table. The lamp shade gave the room a warm orange-yellow tint. It was comforting. I sat on the edge of my bed thinking of what I should wear. He said to wear blue. I wonder why blue. Constance had made me a beautiful blue dress a while ago as a birthday present. The blue fabric was hand dyed by Constance's mother when she was younger. She had kept the fabric to use one day but she never found an occasion to use it for. Constance knew my favorite color was yellow, but she said I needed another pop of color. So, she made me the dress. The top was sheer, but modest, with embroidered lace patters within it. A silk belt like sash was sewn onto the waist. As an add on to the lace pattern, the "roots" of the rose like pattern started at the sash. It was almost like a patch, but it was all hand made by Constance. The end of the dress just passed by my ankles, so not too long and not short enough to be uncomfortable. I was very excited to wear this dress, but the reasons behind it may be different according to Charles.

I slipped on a new pair of shoes. A nude color and white combination that wouldn't look too bad with the blue dress. The bottom portion being a nude color, and the top portion being white with a nude color ribbon tying the look all together. Once again, I walked to the mirror in the corner of my room dreading what I will see. The woman looking back at me was not Beatrice Blackwood. She was a fragile snowflake. Any hint of heat or fire she is just another tear drop. This woman has tear streaks stained on her cheeks. She has lost all of the bright blue color in her eyes. She lost everything she could ever love. Her mother, her father, her sisters who have been distanced from each other. She is distanced from Herself.

I pulled the chair from under the table, and grasped the hard handle of my hair brush. I gently pulled the brush through all of the tangles and snarls that my head of hair held. Satisfied with the softness of it, I braided it. I put a small clip at the bottom of the braid, and tied a small ribbon at the base. I figured, 'Why not add a little more to make Charles happy?' He did seem very off, and it seemed he could blow up at any point. So I better just be careful.

Why am I bothering to dress up for Charles? I should be my own person! But then again... he did seem off, and I do want to put him in a happy mood.

I pushed those thoughts away, placed my locket on, and sighed. I looked to the side table and the clock read: 7:03. Dinner will be set. I better get going then. I shivered as I stood up, most likely getting caught in a drift from my open window. I walked right passed the shall that was placed on my bed, and made my way down the stairs to dinner. When I entered the dining room, my usual seat next to uncle Julian was occupied by, well, Uncle Julian. He usually sits in the chair right next to Charles. Charles was sitting down as I stepped into the room. He looked up from his plate and saw me. His eyes softened as he made eye contact with me. I sent him a small smile, and he returned it. I tried hiding my blush by looking behind me as I walked closer to the table. "Ah Beatrice! Here come sit down." He said while gesturing to the chair next to him. I didn't have anything against sitting next to him, I just feel like it was unnecessary to move Uncle Julians placement at the table. When I sat down, it was all at rest. That is, until Merricat came into the room.

When Merricat came in, the room suddenly got much darker, and much more sinister. This dinner is going to be a long one. I can feel it.

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