Freeing or Fleeing

Chapter Ten - Holding onto Hope

Chapter Ten

The knock on the window of the car door caused Eijaz and I to jump apart. I used the sleeve of my abaya to wipe my runny nose and tears before turning my attention towards the window that Eijaz had already rolled down immediately after the knock. Amma leaned forward, slightly into the car, on Eijaz's side as that was the side parked by the pavement.

"Look, you know how her father can get. Don't be too upset, will you?" she began, attempting to apologise.

Although, there wasn't much of an apology there. I didn't expect anything more from her. I watched as Eijaz ran his fingers through his hair out of frustration and Amma leaned in expectantly.

"With all due respect ––" Eijaz had started only to halt mid-sentence shortly after as I grabbed his arm in an attempt to stop him. I knew where that was leading.

I shook my head to discourage the words that would leave his mouth, aware of the reaction it would cause. He turned to face me as I gave him a warning look and then he turned back towards my mother.

"Please don't," I whispered.

"With all due respect, what he did was wrong and we all very much know that. I will not let it slide; Hafeezah's safety is my top priority," he continued, ignoring my pleading.

"Yeah, well, before you start pointing fingers, maybe you should sort out your own household." Amma's tone changed drastically and with that, she stomped away, back into her house.

She could never handle anyone saying anything about Abba, even with the ill treatment she received from him. In more than one occasion, I undertook the task of telling her that the way he treated her isn't just for her to accept but she always used the 'Allah destined this for me' line. How do you explain to someone who doesn't want to listen that that isn't a part of Islam? I wish she would just understand that this whole destiny thing doesn't work like that. For years, I watched her helplessly hate him, never doing a thing about it. Then, suddenly, he's become the best thing in the world to her. It's all the manipulation and since I got married, she's convinced that he's the only person that will be there for her.

Eijaz turned to me with a quizzical look on his face and I averted my gaze to the floor, suddenly finding interest in my shoes.

"Hafeezah, what is she talking about?" He demanded, starting the engine.

"I don't know," I shrugged, fiddling with my fingers.

I was glad that he was focusing ahead as he drove.

"Don't give me that! Something is going on and it appears that your mother knows something that I don't. What did you tell her?" He attempted again.

"I think the world knows that your mother and I aren't the best of friends," I mumbled, hoping he didn't hear that.

The emotions I felt towards the event that unfolded at my parents' were still fresh and I didn't want to add to it with something that only caused more arguments when I brought it up. I wasn't ready for round two of another fight; round one with my father already knocked me out.

"Why can't you two just get along?" He sighed.

"I ask myself that question every day." It escaped my lips before I realised I said it out loud.

As we approached a traffic light, he turned to face me.

"What's the supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. Can we drop this, please?"

"No, but I'll let you think about it and we can talk when we get home," he replied, sternly.

The traffic lights turned green and Eijaz sped off. As we were turning a corner, not too far from home, I spotted something, or rather someone, walking along the pavement at a leisurely pace. The hood of her jacket was tightly wrapped around her head and she had a few bags around her shoulder. She was kicking the pavement as she went along. Just as she walked under a street lamp, I saw black lines of mascara running down her cheeks. It was the girl that had returned my phone to me.