Assassins shouldn't love, right? {Illumi x Fem!reader} [UNDER HEAVY EDITING]

In the Room II (+flashback)

(Y/n) POV:

(This chapter has a spoiler for the hxh series the chimera ant arc, please read with caution!!)

Fifteen minutes have passed and Illumi still hasn't come out of the bathroom. I have been fiddling with stuff around the room that was lying here and there. I was just about to open the desk drawer that was within the desk in the corner of the room when he finally came out. I had already grabbed the knob of the drawer. When I heard him come out, I tightened my grip on the knob. If I'm going, this drawer's coming with me.

I saw him step out. He was dressed in his normal outfit which clearly resembled #301's so there's no doubt that they are the same person. "Ne, How'd you do that?" I asked him in a sweet voice pretending to be intrigued while in reality, I just wanted to figure out his abilities. "Do what?" He asked now his full attention directed to me. "Change your whole facial structure." I asked, my voice deeper than when I asked the first question. He did not answer that. I was still holding onto the drawer's knob with one-fourth of my strength so it doesn't break.

"I use these needles." He said picking up the round-yellow headed needles from the corner of the bed and then holding them up by the sharp part facing down and their heads facing up.

"And how does that work?"

"I believe I was the one asking questions here."

He said already finding my true objective. "Okay okay, but I asked you, why did you believe me all of a sudden without any proof?" He sighed and started to walk in my direction. I put my guard on high alert incase he tries anything funny. My other hand was free and dangling so I prepared an aura cutlass from it. "No need to use nen." He said moving closer with every step he took. How'd he figure that out I thought as I dismissed the gathered aura.

My guard was getting higher and higher in alert level. I have never been this intimidated.

He took his final step which resulted him standing directly in front of me. I was scared? Nervous? afraid? One of these. I was feeling one of these emotions.

He was taller than me. He had intimidating eyes even if they were blank. It really was a big mistake walking into this room. His gaze deadlier than mine. His gaze more horrifying than mine. His fighting skills are also probably better than mine. His body in a better shape than mine. His eyes blanker than mine. His nen more malicious than mine. His aura worse than mine. In simple words, He was stronger than me in every way possible.

I have to fight and defeat him one day. I have to...I have to.....I have to...

~Yoohoo flashback time~

I was 4 years old. My father had been suffering from severe 3rd stage cancer. There was no hope that he would survive now. I gave all my hopes up on him. The doctors tried everything. He wasn't going to make it.

he only had 4 weeks remaining. I went to visit him almost everyday. I always brought him cards or flowers because that what I could accomplish at that time. He didn't use to say a word. He just gave me a small smile and waved whenever I entered the room he stayed in. Whenever I left or I was about to leave, he'd wave again, with a smile. It was September 12th, I had entered his room. He gave me his usual greeting. I also smiled and gave him the usual. I stayed there for a couple of hours before visiting time for family was over. I gave him a big bear hug and said goodbye. I expected him to do the everyday goodbye. I was about to leave the room with the nurse that had come to pick me up when I say his poorly forced fake smile.

My eyes went blank for a second, I saw him fake a smile. He would never force a fake smile. He'd show when he is sad, angry and mad but he wouldn't force a smile. I went away with that nurse as she lived close by to go back in the house which was no longer about to be owned by my family when he dies. Our house maid greeted me as I entered and changed me into my night clothes. I told her to go and sleep as well as I laid on my bed thinking deeply about today. I could tell the differences between a fake emotion and a real feeling from the day I was brought into this world.