Why him? || Draco x reader

Ten

This school year would be quiet different. We had two other schools as guest for the Triwizard Tournament. We didn't really care much about it since we weren't allowed to Participate anyway.

"So Y/n how's it going on with Malfoy?" Emily asked. We sat on the bench above the lake like usual. Pansy wasn't around so it was a save topic to talk about.

"How should it? He has a girlfriend, I'm still not over him and oh, he hates me. Besides that I don't know if there is something with Blaise right now." I looked down not wanting to talk about it anymore.

"Wait what the time brings. You never know and besides that I've seen him staring at you a few time." Emily responded with a helpless small grin on her face.

"I don't know but what I know is that he has someone." I laid down in the grass and closed my eyes. "He's a bloody puzzle."

**

It was the evening after the triwizard champions got chosen. Our little group sat in the Slytherin common room. After a while I laid down in Blaise arms out of tiredness. We all chatted about the chosen champions and sometime Malfoy joined us. Of course we didn't talk but he was more there because of the boys.

"I can't believe Potter got in." Vincent rolled his eyes.

"True, it's like no matter which rule exist it's for all of us but not Potter." Blaise responded slightly annoyed.

"Of course it doesn't count from him. He's the great Harry Potter!" Draco responded even more annoyed.

They kept making a few jokes about him but none of us girls except of Pansy joined the conversation.
I wasn't really close to Harry and the Gryffindors in generally. I was kind of friends with Hermione and sometimes talked to the Weasley twins but I never happened to get close to Harry, his friends or generally the Gryffindor's. Of course when we saw each other at the corridors or had classes together we said hi but that was the maximum ever since the day we had classes in the forbidden forest in third year.

"Hahaha y/n remember when you had the biggest crush on Finnigan in your first months here." Maya snapped me out of my thoughts. They must have had changed the topic while I was into my thought.

"Seamus Finnigan?" Blaise raised his eyebrows shocked.

"Yeah, I mean he's cute." I felt myself blushing out of embarrassment.

"Do you need glasses or something? He looks like four and acts like three." Malfoy spat from the opposite couch looking clearly disgusted.

"You're the last one who is allowed to make stupid comments about my type Malfoy." I leaned forward and looked him directly in his cold eyes.

I saw that he truly thought about his next words but instead he just brought out an annoyed "whatever " and went to his dorm.
Without saying anything and full of anger because of him once again I decided to go as well. I felt the confused staringscfrom the others in my back but I didn't care at the moment. He always gets on ruining everything.

**

Our first class was D.A.D.A with Gryffindor. Maya and me sat before Malfoy and Blaise. On the table next to us sat Neville Longbottom and Seamus. I had to admit I still think he's kind of cute. Like he could read my mind suddenly Malfoy started to call my name  from behind me.

"Abraham, aren't you feeling weird on your seat?" He asked obviously amused and loud enough for the people around us to hear.

"Why would I Malfoy?"

"Oh I thought because of your little crush on Finnigan it would be weird for you to sit right next to him." He grinned. Of course he heard it. He turned to me and I could see him blushing and so did I - but because of embarrassment. I Didn't know what to do so I stood up and ran out of class, beating Malfoy in the side when I came across his table. I didn't care right now what Snape would think and and how stupid I looked. I made my way straight to the astronomy tower knowing that nobody would look for me there.

For once, why couldn't he shut his mouth for once? He literally wanted me to get a rejection in front of everyone but at least that didn't happen as planned but still the embarrassment was there and he somehow reached what he wanted obviously. I felt a few tears rolling down my cheek. How could I have those feelings for someone who is like that all the time, Who treats me like a peace of shit and would probably kick me off of a cliff if he'd get the chance to.

I stayed up there once again way too long. I probably missed the rest of my classes and lunch as well. At least I grabbed my things with me so I could read a book but sometime I had to go cause I couldn't hide here forever.
I made my way to the common room praying that nobody was there. Luckily they weren't, only Maya and Emily were in our dorm.

"Merlin y/n are you okay? We didn't look for you because we knew you wanted to be alone."

"Did anything happen after I left?"

"Well for some reason Snape didn't care that much. Malfoy kept laughing about his own stupidity until Blaise told him to shut up and that it wasn't okay to 'expose' you and oh, Seamus asked me like five times if it was really true."

"Did you tell him?" I asked kind of confused. He knew but he didn't at the same time.

"I told him everytime that it's the best to talk to you about it. He seemed kind of happy if you ask me." Maya slightly grinned.

I cupped my face in my hands "I have to talk to him about it now do I? Oh Merlin please not." I threw myself in my bed never wanting to get out of it again.

"If you ask me he seemed more happy than anything else." Emily pulled me up.
"And now we're going to dinner, we're already late." She continued "you've been gone the whole day."

**

When we finally sat down on the Slytherin table I constantly wanted to leave again.

"Are you okay?" Pansy asked with a soft smile. "I thought you didn't want to be found."

"Yeah it's alright." I nodded with a small smile trying to hide my feelings.

I sat there for a while and ate nothing, stared at the table and avoided the stupid gazes I got from Malfoy.

Suddenly a hand touched mine.
"Maya finally wanted to talk to Fred so we're going over the to the Gryffindors. Do you want to join us? Maybe you could talk so Seamus?"

"Yeah I'm coming, maybe it's fine."

At the Gryffindor table it took only like twenty seconds for him to notice me and come up to me. It was kind of weird and I could see how nervous he was.

"Hey." He smiled carefully.

"Hi." I responded trying to sound as normal as I could.

"Would you like to go out with me for a minute so we can... talk?"

"Yes." I smiled and followed him out of the great hall into an empty corridor.

"So is it true what Malfoy said?"

"I.. I mean kind of. I used to have a huge crush on you when I was new here but not anymore. Don't get me wrong now, I still do think you're cute to be honest."

He smiled and looked down to his feet. "well you know, I think you're cute too. But I thought to forget it since you're friends with Zabini and all the Slytherin's but now that I know how you feel - felt, would you like to go on... on a date with me to Hogsmeade on Saturday? Just to get to know each other better and see what happens next." He smiled but I could see his fear of rejection.

"Yes, with pleasure." I still smiled at him.

We made our way back into the great hall and as we entered I looked over to the Slytherin table getting in a short eye contact with Malfoy. I broke it fast but saw Blaise next to him as well. Then it came over me.
I do love... like whatever Malfoy.
I don't know if Blaise likes me more than a friend and how I even feel about him.
And I thought Seamus were cute and would even go on a date with him.
My thoughts kept leading me always back to Malfoy somehow.
The one I have no chance with, the one who's heart belongs to someone else, the one I'll never have.