Come by Night 3: Kitsune No Yomeiri

Chapter Eight - Never Back Down

Sometimes I forget how impressive and terrible my husband is. The face he shows me is usually gentle, his eyes like a child's whenever he gazes at me. I see his kindness, his sweetness. It is easy to cast aside my memories of the demon fox who destroyed my town.

As relieved as I am to see him, I am also afraid. Even though he remains beautiful, he wears his ruthless demeanor like his kimono. He slaughtered those fiends without hesitation, but still Mitsuaki's anger oozes from him, and turning the darkness darker. I tremble at the raw force of the demon whose glowing eyes pierce through the shadows to scorch my soul.

"I-Isamu?" I ask, uncertain. He walks over and crouches beside me. I do not know if I should embrace my husband or cringe.

"Are you hurt?" he asks. His tone is softer than expected.

"I am fine," I cough. I am shaken, it's true, but other than being frightened out of my wits, I am all right.

"What are you doing out here?" There is accusation in his tone. I hear the hurt and confusion beneath.

"I..." I feel so embarrassed. I do not want to explain why I went out, or that I had not intended to be long. If I were normal, untouched by the demon world, it would never have happened.

"Come."

He picks me up in his arms and takes me directly back to our room. He doesn't say anything else, but I can tell he is upset with me. His shoulders are tight, his posture rigid. I feel like I disobeyed him, and he clearly thinks so. I am a little girl quailing beneath my father's disapproval.

At first, I curl in on myself, just wanting this entire nightmare to be over. Why do I feel like a naughty child? Am I a bad wife because I needed to relieve myself? Do yōkai not have such body functions?

My fox husband does not understand. He must think me foolish and disobedient after I promised to do as he says. This is not a safe place, and we are not here on holiday. Guilt makes my chest tight.

"Isamu," I whisper when he slides the door shut, needing to explain.

When he turns to me, his beautiful face is a mix of anger and fear. I see how worried he was, that he thought I was safe and somehow got mixed up in mischief I could not manage without him. I let him down. And I might have exposed us in the bargain. I know it isn't my fault, not truly, but I still bear the burden of my actions. I am angry with myself, and my body most of all. I feel like I betrayed my family.

"I didn't mean for—"

And that's when he turns his frustration loose on me.

"Damn it! I told you to rest. Why did you leave the room?" he scolds.

"I didn't want to!"

"Then why, Hotaru? Could you not listen to me for even an hour? Do you not trust me?"

"Of course I do!" I protest.

"I cannot rescue you and Tsuki-chan both! This is why I wanted you to stay behind."

This makes me unspeakably angry. "Don't say that! I know I made a mistake, but I can be an asset! I need to get Tsukiko—"

"Do you not trust me to get her back?" he asks in male indignation.

"You do not understand!" Hot tears fill my eyes in frustration. He won't let me speak.

"This is dangerous for us both! You heard the messenger. We will be imprisoned if we are captured!" he exclaims in a hushed whisper.

"I know that! Do you think I am stupid?"

"You are far from stupid, but I do not think you understand the severity of our situation. Even I have my limits against the gods! What possessed you to thwart my will when I only want to keep you safe?"

"I had to pee!" I shriek. Mitsuaki's ears furrow back.

Never before has he seen me so upset. His lips part, but no sound emerges. For the first time, he is speechless. It is almost comical, but I am too upset to laugh.

"I'm sorry I am a burden to you, I am! Maybe I shouldn't have come, but I couldn't stay behind!" Tears roll down my cheeks and I cannot stop them. I don't bother to try. "I can't keep waiting for you, Mitsu- Isamu. I need you by my side."

My face crumples and I turn away, but he latches onto me and holds me tight. "Hotaru, I am terrified of losing you and Tsukiko. It seems my fate to constantly be in danger of losing anything I love!"

I hear his grief, his darkest, most naked fear revealed. In some ways, he truly is a child, my demon husband. I hold him, stroking his hair, comforting him in return for the comfort he provides. All our rough words aside, I am so glad he's back. My lips graze his, my arms wrap around his shoulders. Never has a man possessed me of such lust! But, of course, he is a demon. He inspires my body's arousal in his touch, his appearance, and his scent. He was made for this.

And I was made for him.