The King's Swan | Jikook |

Chapter 32: Under the Moon

      "I couldn't have..." Jungkook cried, running his hands up his own arms to hug himself carefully; softly feeling the silk of his robe kiss the palms of his hands. "I couldn't have done it... I couldn't have broken my promise! I tried so hard to keep him in my head and focus on him, but I let it go and harmed him!"

       "You didn't know any better, you couldn't hold on long enough and couldn't focus. Ruts can make you do the craziest things, I know it does. Blaming yourself about the past isn't going to fix what happened. If Jimin was truly marked, then you have to accept it. What are the odds of Jimin facing the same issue? It would be tough on him as well, he's engaged and he lives under his father's wing," Yoongi said, watching the king lose himself in the endless guilt that peaked around the corner.

       "Yoongi, I promised him. If he is marked as mine, he must be crying and despising every second I take breathing! I don't want my omega to hate me... I don't want a relationship my Mother and Father had, I just want someone to love me..."

        "You're overreacting. Jimin is a smart boy, I'm sure he will understand that even you couldn't handle what was done that night. When it comes to things like these, you need to take a step back and notice it, talk about it, understand it, and let it be. It's all in the process of letting things go, everything happens for a reason, Jungkook," Yoongi spoke softly. His words of guidance always had a caring tone underneath the sound of his deep and calming voice.

       Jungkook pondered the words of his head guard and processed it further. Yoongi was always there for him to guide the king into making the right decisions. Even if the king could easily have an advisor help him make these decisions, no one was as close to the king other than his personal head guard. Surely, there could be his other advisor within the royal court to guide him on making peace with other lands and demanding war if necessary, but none of them carried such valuable words and personal coaching like Yoongi did. The two were closer than any other royal court members to the king.

       As the full moon rose to its highest in the night sky, Jungkook laid in his bed with a white silk robe as his hair still remained in a topknot tie without the crown sitting over it. The window was open and his eyes met with the moon lying ahead as it had yet to reach the top. As the king looked at the moon from afar, allowing the moonlight to shine into his room, he still contemplated the silence; the thickness of the atmosphere of being alone. At times, he could recall the feeling of ecstasy with Jimin, it was written along the walls of the silent room. The way he had the omega huffing against his skin, moaning his name and gasping at every thrust. It all felt familiar, but the memory was like the wind blowing in around him; it was something he felt, but couldn't grasp with his hands.

       Once the king found himself falling asleep after exhausting himself with his constant overthinking, his eyes weighed in closed and his lashes rested over the under part of his eyes. Just then, the door to his room slid open and that alone was enough to awaken the boy before he slipped into slumber for the night. His gaze shot up to the entry as he tugged his blanket to see the familiar omega he longed to be with, Park Jimin.

      Jimin stood at the entry after sliding the door shut, gazing at the king in silence as they took a moment to allow their gaze to meet after such a long time apart. Surely it didn't take long since it was only three days, but the two were too closely bonded to believe that three days were too long to even stay away.

      Jungkook sat up with a smile over his childish gaze before he got out of bed. "Jimin!" Jungkook spoke out and watched Jimin's face carry a tale of worry as if it weighed down on him along with the weight of the world. The swan was exhausted sneaking into the palace and he was also tired deep down for holding back such a secret he couldn't bear to keep in.