The first thing I would like to say to the younger dommes, like myself, is being a dom or sub at a younger age can be complicated. Proper equipment is difficult to acquire and it's super important you understand the risks (and benefits involved in using makeshift toys.
A really good example of this is ropes. Professional bondage ropes are softer, a bit like hoodie strings, to avoid chafing. However if you've got a pain tolerant submissive they might enjoy the roughness of it. However, for starting out specialised equipment is preferable if you can get hold of it.
Safewords, however, are always a necessity. A safe word tends to be a word that is said when a scene gets too much. I tend to use the traffic light system. Red for stop immediately, orange or amber for slow down and green for more. These dont just have to just be used sexually, but also to check up on the general well being of your subs. I would recommend once a safeword is established it is tested. To ensure it's easy to say. And your dom is respectful of it.
I'd also like to point out that safewords arnt always verbal some might be little taps or a blink. This is usually used, however, when the submissive is a little... tied up... Its also worth knowing that safewords are used by doms as well, because even though we act all tough we worry too.
The most important thing to know about safewords though is how important they are. And using one doesnt make you weak it makes you trust worthy. Because then both the submissive and the dominant know their limits.
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What I've Learned Being A Domme
Non-FictionA surprising amount of people have asked me if I've got any advice for doms starting out, and I think that's really sweet so I figured that, for the new doms I'd keep record of what I knew. Bare in mind, however, that I am by no means a professional...
