Flicker||TLOUII {Joel x Reader}

•9•

Watching everyone freak out in the comment section last chapter is pretty funny

(Y/N) sits on the edge of a porch, leaning against the beam and squeezing her knees to her chest. She watches the leaf on the ground swirl about slightly and then stop completely. It was the only bit of colour blooming that she had seen in the harsh winter and she digs her boot into the crisp of the snow.

Tommy slumps down beside her with a sigh, clutching a box and he passes it over to her. When she doesn't take it, he sits it at her feet.

"Maria wants me to make sure you're eatin'."

She doesn't speak and he clicks his tongue. "Just seen Joel and he told me what he said. He wants you to know he's sorry."

"And he can't tell me this himself?" (Y/N) snaps and he shrugs. "Fair point."

"She can't stop us." She then sighs. "She can't stop me."

"Sweetheart, to have the guys that we would need to do this smart we'd be leaving Jackson vulnerable..." Tommy reminds her.

(Y/N), her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, looks at him and he can't help but look away. "So they just get to get away with this?"

Tommy groans, bringing himself to make eye contact with her. He can see the burning spark in her eyes, the edges brimmed with tears and he shakes his head. "Nobody wants that."

"Yeah, but that's what happening!" She exclaims.

"What if we get hit by hunters again?" He counters.

(Y/N) chuckles, twisting the ring on her left hand. "Is this you talking or her?" She scoffs and in annoyance, Tommy turns his body to face her. "It's a valid point!"

"If it were me or Joel, fuck even you after all these years, Ellie would be halfway to Seattle already."

"No, she wouldn't -"

"She absolutely fucking would be." (Y/N) abruptly stands, wincing slightly as she puts pressure on her busted leg. "You didn't know her like I did and neither did Joel."

"(Y/N), we don't even know for certain that they're from Seattle."

"Washington Liberation Front. That's what was on those patches."

"What if they stole those jackets?" Tommy shrugs.

"That's..."

"What if the WLF moved?"

"What are you doing?" (Y/N)'s voice raises in frustration, her eyes had already starting watering and Tommy sighs, staring up at her as she leans on her good leg.

"You know what?" She pulls down the sleeve of her hoodie, wiping her eyes and her nose. "I'm leaving tomorrow and I don't expect you or your dumbass brother to join me."

"You have no idea what you're walking into. You don't know how large that group is, how armed - "

"I don't care." (Y/N) cuts him off, adamant. "You can't talk me out of this."

Tommy can realise how much this meant to his sister-in-law and he stands with a heavy sigh. "Give me a day to talk to Maria. Okay? Gotta be some folk she can spare."

"And if she won't budge?"

"Well, I'll figure something out. One day. Please."

(Y/N) bites her lip, looking at the same leaf on the ground and then nodding. "Fine." She says and Tommy lets out a breath of relief.

He walks towards her, pulling her in for a hug and she can't stop herself from crying, burying her face into him. He looks up at the sky, after all the years of getting to know her and Ellie, he hated that things had come to this.

"Don't tell Joel." She mutters and he nods.

"Okay... okay." He hesitantly whispers, pulling away.

"Don't tell Joel what?"

(Y/N) turns to see Joel stood there. He was clutching his side and had a hurt expression on his face. Tommy backs away from her. "This isn't what it looks like -"

"Tommy can you give us a minute?" She asks and he nods, leaving them two to it.

Joel shrugs. "So?" He questions.

"I wanted to avenge Ellie's death, yknow, be all heroic and all. But considering she's not my daughter -"

"(Y/N), I didn't mean it like that -"

She waves him off and he sighs. "But Tommy made me see that there's no point. We don't even know where they are or how many we would be up against."

Joel regards her stance, trying to see if she had a plan or not and he determines she was telling the truth. "Well, alright." He mutters, ending it at that.

(Y/N) grabs the beam, sliding herself back down on the porch and straightening out her injured leg. Joel hobbles next to her and strips off his jacket, passing it to her. She takes it from him, the two not exchanging words as she wraps it around herself and gently leans her head on his shoulder.

***

Sitting beside the small headstone, (Y/N) fiddles with the flowers in the vase. Her eyes were glazed with tears, hours gathered on her cheeks and a damp spot on her hoodie sleeve.

"El, you silly girl." She chuckles. "You're the bravest person I had ever met and I miss you so much." She whispers.

The ex firefly sniffs slightly, her fingertips exposed in her fingerless gloves runs lightly over the name.

"It should've been me."

And with those final words, the woman sits there in silence, her shoulders racking with quiet sobs for the loss of her daughter.