-MAJOR TIME SKIP IK, SORRY-
Kim Taehyung, currently the happiest man in the world in the arms of his favorite person, who he couldn't get enough of! Jeon Jungkook. the one and only. they have been the happiest for the past three months that Taehyung has completely let go off the diary and so has Jungkook.
Taehyung tilts his head slowly to admire Jungkook's beautiful face that was currently adorned with his doe like eye, wide in happiness and his everlasting bunny smile because of something on the tv screen. they were cuddled up on the elder's couch currently having their weekly movie night date. but for the first time, Tae wasn't able to watch the movie as his concentration kept shifting to the younger whose chest he was against. a bad feeling constantly brewing up in his chest, for the past couple of days has left him restless and he was eager to talk to the younger about it but at the same time scared to. he didn't want to confront, what could possibly be the truth and just wanted to hid in his current fantasy for a while more. so he turned completely towards Jungkook and snuggled further into him while Jungkook just laughed at the elder's antics, yet holding him closer. this small act was enough to subside the doubts in Tae's mind as he let it wander elsewhere. he swore he would deal with it later, once Jungkook has gone back.
and so, after 3 hours of him letting his mind wander aimlessly, he was finally looking for the diary that he had hid under the sheets of his bed. he dusts the cover and sets it on his study, and locks the door carefully as to not let people in the house know what he is up to. the rest of the night was rather eventful for tae, as he was struggling to stable his shivering hands and also, keep the tears in his eyes as he finally let all his thoughts out to the diary
--
ik i havent written in a while and have completely ignored your existence but i really do have something very bad in mind that i think you could help me with, dear diary.
what is going on about me? im unable to grasp all these thoughts in my mind. i know my kookie wont do anything like that but why cant i stop the fear in my mind that i wont be able to see him any longer.
why am i not able to subside the thought and assure myself that i would have kookie with me all throughout my life and for an eternity more?
is this just my insecurity and jealous side blooming because of all the other guys he has been talking to lately, that i seemingly always saw him avoid otherwise...
or,
is there some truth behind my thoughts and that my bunny would get tired of me and leave me behind for someone better?
idek why im telling a diary all this when you cant reply or answer. but you are the only source of comfort i have right now...so would you be the one assuring me that these are just useless thoughts in my mind right now?
or should i just go ask him tomorrow and get himself to confirm that these are indeed just stupid useless thoughts and that he is indeed my forever, like we already talked and agreed upon?
whatever it is...i dont like this feeling anymore
and i dont want it to stay any longer either...
~kth
