Pain that never goes away

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Kims P.O.V.

I looked at the boy,the boy I killed,the very first time I murdered someone.He looks at me and as I look into his brown eyes I can basically read his mind."You ruined my hope of surviving,I planned so much and instead you shortend it.Why?" I looked away but instead see him again only closer."WHY?" Tears were flowing through my eyes and I tried to keep looking away but he woud just reappear.I tried closing my eyes and that  made it even worse,he was closer with every feeling of hatred on me,and only me."I am sorry you just tried to kill me and I had to kill you or you would have killed me,I am sorry.I wish I could be dead,I am sorry,so,so,so,sorry.   I woke up to Thomas hugging me tightly and I am crying.I keep reapeating sorry,so sorry. Thomas looked at me and kept hugging me trying to calm me bust it's no use.I killed a boy and I can never you him or the other boy.Finnaly there was nothing left in  my eyes and I just sat there to scared to sleep.Thomas laid there looking at me and then looking at nothing."Kim you know I always saw you in school and you always stayed away from me and all my friends,as if it was inntentional...why do you do that?" He looked at me with his blue eyes and for a moment I wanted to lie."Well you are sort of popular and ya'll could sometimes  act like jerks,I never wanted you and your friends to become my friends because then I knew I would be like y'all.Also you looked like you were never having fun."He nodded and turned away.At first I thought he took offensive but then he began to talk."When I realized you would try to stay away from us is when you had to tutor me and my friends in science,when time was up you would leave never saying goodbye and hanging out for a little while."He looked at me with a confused face.He should be confused after all they are jocks,why would any girl stay away from them?

"I never thought y'all would want to talk to me,I am no beauty,and defnitly not popular and-" I was cutt off by him kissing me.At first I enjoyed but I realized and forgot about Logan and shoved him."You can keep the sleeping bag." I said to him in a way that sounds like I hate him and walked away.I turned to see him get up his face full of confusion and sadness, and thats when I realized Logan was not there.

He never returned to the cave.

I kicked Scarlett to get up and got Ashley up."No time for questions Logan is missing." I walked to Mike and gently touched Toby.Mike woke up instatly alert."Logan is not here." He got up and so did Toby.I touched Toby's nose telling him to follow me.As I crept out of the hole with Toby fear of Logan being dead swelled into my chest.I tried to walk as quitley as I could as I whispered Logans name.I someone found me I could shoot them easily unless they had a weapon to.About 60 feet from the cave and I hear rustling.I grab my gun when I see Logan popping out he turns and screams for me to turn around.I slowly turn around and I see Toby attacking a man.The man instantly kills Toby with a shot from his 22.I scream as I see Toby touch the floor and I shot the man killing him.I run to my dog with tears flowing as I touch his bloody head."NOOOOO." I keep screaming and crying at the same time as I see toby laying lifeless.Logan grabs me and Mike and the man from Scarletts group.I fight them until I give up.As they drag me across the ground I see Toby laying there still as can be.I look at my hands that are covered in blood,I began to scream more and more kicking away from them trying to get back to Toby.Finnaly there are able to shove me down the hole I stare at my hands covered in blood.Everyone was up even though it was barely morning.I kept talking to myself telling myself it was okay but nothing relieved me.Ashley washed my hands at one point in time and Logan tried me to eat anything,all I did was drink a little and that was it.As the day lurked on I felt weaker and lonlier then I vere felt.I have lost almost everything.Everything.

Sorry it is a short chapter comment if you have ideas!

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