Crashing Hard

Scared ~15

Trigger warning this book does contain event, words, and thoughts that can be triggering. It also has sexual events and talked about r*pe and su**idal events.
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"Hello everyone it's been a while since I last seen you all," David yelled over everyone and the room got quiet. "As you can see brothers, my girl has returned back to me. Now we can get back to business"

Was David involved with the Mafia. Was he apart of it.

Allan (Lawrence) stepped away from me and walked back towards the group of men. If David was apart of the mafia that would cause more problems for everyone. He could easy hurt everyone trying to help me. He could kill them and he would obviously have people to help him. I felt my body jerk forward as if I was gonna throw up. Just thinking about him hurting my son or my family made me sick. I looked up and he was staring at me still talking.

"We have supplies we need to pick up and supplies we need to drop off. This all needs to go smoothly I don't want a mess to clean up. No dead bodies this time."

I quickly and as quietly as I could walked to the bathroom. I felt like I was gonna throw up. I felt lightheaded and could feel by body sway as I held onto the counter. My vision was blurry and I couldn't breathe. Hot tears were starting to run down my face and my knees were about to give in.

He's gonna kill them all. My mom, my dad, and my son. He's gonna kill them. He's gonna kill Jong, Eric, and Carse. No. No. No. This is my fault it's all my fault. I should've just let him kill me when he had the chance. I can't let him kill them. He's gonna kill them. Then he's gonna kill me. I shouldn't have gotten them involved. This is all my fault. You're so stupid Iliza why did you get them involved.? YOURE STUPID ILIZA. YOU MESS UP EVERYTHING. YOU CAN NEVER DO ANYTHING RIGHT. EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH DIES BECAUSE OF YOU. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Worthless idiot.

My breathing was getting quicker by the second and I was so dizzy. I moved over towards the toilet and vomited finally. It didn't help and only made me more lightheaded and dizzy. When I was finished I flushed the toilet and sat on the floor facing the door. I leaned my head back onto the bathtub and closed my eyes. I worked on slowing my breathing down and getting my body to calm down. The sounds from outside were gone there was no more talking and no more loud voices. I could hear footsteps, the bathroom walls were like paper which made everything easy to hear. The footsteps continued all the way to the bathroom door. Whoever was there knocked softly on the door.

" Iliza?"

I couldn't recognize the voice. I was so sleepy I just wanted to lay on the floor and go to sleep.

"Iliza are you in there?"

I moved my body in a position on the floor so I could lay down and sleep comfortably. They kept knocking but I just drowned out the sounds. I laid there for what seemed like hours and started to fall asleep. The knocking became more aggressive and frantic. I looked at the door it seemed so far away. The lock could easy be opened from the outside with and object you just had to turn it. The knocking stop and the footsteps faded away. So I laid my head back down and closed my eyes again.

"Iliza. Iliza. Iliza. Wake up."

I didn't have the energy to respond. I could feel myself being carried somewhere. Words wouldn't form in my head or come out of my mouth only groans.

"Iliza. Wake up."

Whoever was carrying me put me on a bed. This made me even sleepier. There was no way I was gonna get up or even fully wake up now.

"Fine you want to sleep then sleep. You made a mess in the bathroom so I have to clean it."

I groaned back a half assed answer and went back to sleep. My sleep was filled with nightmares and constantly tossing and turning. I needed someone here to hold me. Someone like...Jong. I need his comfort and reassurance. Was that weird? It's not like we are in a relationship so why would I want him at a time like this.?

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I HAVE FINALLY UPDATED. It was kind of a spur of the moment write. I literally just woke up and I was like "I want to write about this" so I did 🥳. I checked this morning at we have 1k reads. YAY. I'm so happy even tho that probably doesn't seem like a lot it is to me. I'm a young girl who randomly decided to write a book in her free time and look how many reads it got. While it might not be the BEST book ever I'm still proud of myself. I like in some way I relate to Iliza and her abusive relationship. Not in all sense but in some. I also think that's why I had a spur of the moment. I want everyone to know YOU CAN LEAVE THAT RELATIONSHIP IF YOU ARENT HAPPY. IF THEY ARE ABUSING YOU THEY DONT LOVE YOU. PLEASE FOR YOUR ( and if you have children) SAKE YOU NEED TO LEAVE THE ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP. It's not easy and it's going to be had in the beginning but in the end everything will be better and you can make a better life for yourself( and kids if you have them). Even if they tell you that you can't find anyone better or anyone to love you trust me YOU CAN AND WILL. Being single isn't so bad either.

Have a nice day everyone if you are ever in need of someone to listen to you problems come to me. I'm not amazing with advice but I will listen. So you guys can ask for my insta, snap, or message me on here. It might take me a little bit if you message me on here because I'm not on here all the time. :)