Desperation

Chapter three

~Y/N POV~

The sound of my alarm on my phone abruptly woke me up from my sleep. Even with waking up it felt like I hadn't slept at all.

Groaning at the constant ringing I grabbed my phone and turned it off with a heavy sigh. I put my phone back down on the side table and rubbing eyes and to stretch my arms in the air with a little whine from my lips with stretching my limps.

I sat up and scratched the top of my head and looked around my room. It looks cleaner from what I remember when I went to sleep last night. Then I suddenly remember my dream. Did time actually go back?

Grabbing my phone again I checked the date and it does seem that it was two months before Jungkook died. My eyes widen but a smile spread across my face. I was relieved to know that it wasn't all just an ordinary dream. That my mind wasn't making it up and in deed it was two months before....

Jungkook!

I jumped off my bed and ran to my window to peer across to his house, to his very bedroom window with his curtains open for a change. After Jungkook died his curtains were never open but now they are and I can see inside his bedroom.

I could just see his figure sitting on the edge of his bed with a book in his hand as if he were reading something before he suddenly looks my way with no expression. Whether he was looking at me or not I don't know but either way I just waved at him excited to see him living and breathing.

However I did notice the little frown he gave me but waved back at me with uncertainty. I squealed in excitement and ran away from the window to begin getting changed for school. I can believe it, he's alive!

I got changed and ready for school. Usually I would have a shower but I was too much in a rush not wanting to miss Jungkook in walking to school. From now on I'm going to walk to school with him whether he likes it or not. I tied my hair up in a ponytail, grabbed my school bag and other things I would need and of course my phone and then quickly grabbed a bit of toast from my mom still in a rush to catch Jungkook and then out the door so quickly.

I've never been like this with going to school but I cant help my self.

Coming out the front door just finishing my toast after large bites did I see Jungkook just walking off his porch with his bag over his shoulder and begin to walk up the street. I cursed to myself and began to run towards him, running off my own porch and ran to him as fast as I could.

"Jungkook!!"

I shouted his name however at first he didn't respond and kept walking so I just ran faster until I finally caught up with him and collided into his back, wrapping my arms around his waist forcing him to come to a stand still.

"Jungkook."

I breathed out his name with a smile on my face that wouldn't be going anywhere any time soon. I could cry in this moment, he was here in my arms and I could feel him breathing but his whole body was stiffened as if he didn't know what to do.

"Er, Y/n? What are you doing?" Jungkook

"I'm giving you a hug."

I spoke back like it was nothing.

"I can see that but why?" Jungkook

I loosened the grip on his and he took this opportunity to turn around to face me but I didn't let go so I instead hug him from the front. I wasn't done, I don't want to let go of him no matter how this looks.

"I just wanted to give you a hug, please?"

He didn't say anything nor did he try to push me away but instead just stood there all frozen but the longer I stayed glued to his chest the more he started to relax and in the end he started to hug me back. His own arms around my shoulders and the top of his head leaning against the top of mine. I could hear his steady heart beat through his chest which was only more confirmation this is real.

He's alive.

Eventually I pulled back from him and he shifted uncomfortably on his feet trying to look anywhere else on the street but me.

"I'm sorry." Jungkook

"For what? I hugged you first and I'm not sorry for it."

I smiled at him and he just looked down at me and nods but that didn't mean I didn't miss the small smile he stopped himself from showing.

"Can I walk to school with you?"

His eyes widen and he starts to look around the street again and others either walking to school or just simply other people just going about their day.

"Are you serious?" Jungkook

I nod at him and tug on his sleeve for us to get going to school before we're late.

"Yes I'm very serious. If it's okay with you I'd like to walk home with you too and we can start doing this everyday. I think we could both use the company."

I smiled at him and yet he remained speechless and didn't argue with me about it. He did though start to walk along with me to school but I didn't notice how he seemed a little uncomfortable about that. There was silence between the two of us. I didn't find it uncomfortable at all but I could tell that Jungkook had his thinking face on and it was a matter of time before he says something to me about what he was thinking. I missed that face, with the way he would glare off into space and bite down on his lower lip in deep thought.

"Why are you doing this Y/n?" Jungkook

I knew it. It was only a matter of time.

"Doing what?"

"This? Why are you wanting to walk with me to and from school?" Jungkook

I stopped with a heavy sigh and grabbed his arm to stop him too. I cant tell him the full truth but I can tell him part of it.

"Because I'm a bad friend and I broke my promise to you. I also want to start making it up to you and maybe start our friendship over if you'd like to, please?"

Jungkook just stares into my eyes which is not something he does often but only when he's searching for something. But he can stare into my eyes all he wants to because all he's going to find is my sincerity to what I've just told him.

I want to be friends with him again and start up with that. I'd be willing to do anything at this point.

"Friends? You want to be friends with me? Again?" Jungkook

I nod eagerly to confirm his thoughts.

"Yes Friends, please?"

I pleading with him but again he was in deep thought.

"Okay fine. I'd like to try to be friends again." Jungkook

I cheered and ended up hugging him again which this time he lets out a small chuckle, it was very small, almost unnoticeable but I caught it. Pulling away from him I grabbed his wrist and tugged on him again to begin walking to school before we're really late.

Step one to becoming close with Jungkook is complete. Now I just have to ease him into things of being my friend again with walks to and from school. As much as I'd like to force my way back into his life I think I may have to be very easy on him and not make him think something is seriously wrong.

Hopefully this time round I can keep him from doing something stupid again.