Chapter 50

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Maura's POV

I woke up and just felt upset because me and Hayes are fighting.

I went downstairs and Hayes was sitting on the couch watching TV and Matt was in the kitchen eating so I went into the kitchen.

"Hayes can we talk about this" I yelled to him

"No Maura, there's nothing to talk about! You changed your a hoe now! Your gonna die of aids one day so you mine as well commit suicide sooner or later, no ones gonna care" Hayes said

Holy shit.

I just started crying, I ran up to my room and shut the door.

Is that what they all think?

I just sat against my door balling my eyes out, I've never cried this hard before, not even when my mom died.

Me and Hayes are best friends and he just said that, I can't take this. Maybe he is right.

I went to my desk and wrote a few letters.

"Nash,
I promise this isn't your fault at all. You took such good care of me and I thank you for that. Me being here just isn't meant to be. I'm gonna miss you the most, we have so many memories. Your the best big brother ever Nash. I love you to the moon and back 6,000 times. I don't know what I would've done without you, your the reason I've been here for so long. I hope when you think of me you don't think of this day, the depressed me. I hope you think of the happy me, when me and Hayes were getting along and I didn't have any worries. Mom raised 3 amazing happy people, you, Hayes, and will. I was happy when she was here and I'm happy when I'm with you but it's time for me to go see mommy again Nash. I'll watch over you, I'll be your guardian angel. I know I'll be the happiest little thing ever in heaven watching over you and the guys while being with mommy. I love you Nash and always will.
Love, Maura."

There are tears on the paper.

I decided to write to Hayes.

"Hayes,
I'm sorry that I upset you by apparently being a hoe. Your my twin brother, I can't be here if you think otherwise and if we're fighting. We never fight Hayes, I hate it and i can't take it anymore. Me and you have been through the most together and I will never forget any of it. Your the nicest person ever, I can't wait until you find the right girl for you. I want you to know that I love you and will never forget you. You made it official that I should go see mommy today, I can't wait to watch over you. Stay golden pony boy
Love, Mar"

At the point I'm shaking while writing this.

"Will,
Your doing great, don't let this slow you down. I'm so proud of you. And I'm gonna be even more proud when you find the right girl and have your own kids. You took care of me like I was your kid, your seriously amazing will. Thank you for always being there for me. I'm always gonna be here with you and Hayes and Nash and all of the guys, just not in person. I'm gonna look over you with mommy and fill her in on everything! I love you so so so so much will! Keep doing what you do best!
Love, Maura"

I can't stop crying and shaking.

"Cameron,
I'm not even your sister but you treated me like one. Your the nicest person I've ever met in my life. You make me laugh when I'm down. I love how you call me kiddo all the time. Thanks for always giving me a shoulder to cry on. Thanks for taking care of me and sharing lots of laughs with me. I can't thank you enough for everything. I can't wait to see what your kids look like from heaven. I'm gonna go be with my mommy. I love you so much cameron, thanks for being my 4th brother. Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.
Love, Maura"

I can't write a lot more so all of the guys are getting one together.

"Boys, (jack, jack, Shawn, Matt, Taylor, Aaron, and carter)
Thanks for being great to me! You guys are so many peoples role models, even mine. You guys make me smile all the time. I've enjoyed the time I've been with you guys. Today I decided it was time I go see my mom because someone even told me too so I'm gonna. I love every single one of you.
Love, Maura"

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