s u m m e r l y n
b l a n e y - m u r p h y
"Looking good Noah, I like the neck brace." I joked as Noah walked up to my car before pre-race ceremonies. "Better not run into Busch, he'll make fun of you."
"Very funny, you should be a comedian." Noah rolled his eyes. "Hey, sibling favor, if you have the opportunity please push him into the inside or outside wall."
"What do I get out of it?"
"Free lunch for a week and if you get fined for intentional wrecking I'll pay it."
"Hmm, deal." I shrugged as Theo walked up to us.
"Looking as striking as ever my man." Theo laughed, patting Noah on the back.
"Man, you guys are just full of jokes, today aren't ya?" Noah comments as he set his sight on Brexton walking past us to his car, which was on the pole for today's race.
"Just when I thought you couldn't look any dumber Blaney." Brexton laughed walking past.
"You're lucky I didn't send you the hospital bill asshole!" Noah yelled back. "That guy I swear, please one of you send him into a wall?"
"Leave me out of this," Theo says, raising his hands. "Good luck today babe." Theo left, kissing my cheek before walking to his car, leaving my body stiff as I watched him stalk away. Noah raises an eyebrow as Theo leaves the two of us alone.
"What?"
"You guys okay? You're usually more awestruck around Theo."
"I-uh, it's just that Theo and I have had a few disagreements recently." I shifted uncomfortably on my heels, my marriage, and personal life was something I kept very private and is not one thing I felt comfortable talking about with my brother. "It's nothing serious."
"I know you're lying to me, but I won't push you to do anything, but I'm here Sum if you ever need to talk. Even talk to mom and dad they got this whole marriage thing looking easy. Believe it or not, I've been married for about as long as you."
| f l a s h b a c k -
t h e o
m u r p h y 's
p o v |
"Summer?" I called out, barely knowing how to function at this moment, holding a plastic test in my hand. Summer walks in and stopped instantly seeing what was in my hand, her body tensed up, face became pale. "What's this?"
"I-um, I'm pregnant." She spilled out. I became overwhelmed with a sense of happiness and felt overjoyed that finally, we were going to have a family, that I had barely noticed Summer's uncomfortable, and almost saddened demeanor.
"What's wrong?" I questioned, cupping her face in my hands. She didn't make eye contact and something told me that she wasn't as happy about this as I was. "Summer, talk to me-"
"We didn't plan this Theo-" Her voice trailed off. "I-I don't want to have this baby."
"W-what? What do you mean?"
"I've been trying to accept it but just can't Theo. I don't want this. I'm not ready for this commitment yet-"
"We've talked about this Summer, we've always wanted a family. This isn't making any sense, you're not making any sense."
"Theo, I've already explained myself. I'm done talking about this." She quickly turned to walk downstairs. I was hot on her heels going down those stairs, I needed more of a damn explanation, call me stubborn, but I wasn't quitting till I got one out of her.
"Summerlyn, we ain't done discussing this. That's all I get? You just don't want one? You aren't ready? I need more context here to try and see where you're coming from."
"I don't need this baby right now, I'm at the top of my game here Theo. I'm finally getting somewhere in the Cup career if I leave now? I lose all of that!"
My heart shattered into a million pieces hearing those words... I know this wasn't the woman I fell in love with, I don't know where she yet but I wanted her back desperately... This disheartening feeling was quickly overshadowed by a wave of anger...
"So it's about racing?"
"Yes Theo, it is."
"So, you're telling me that you're damn racing career is more important than starting a family with me?" I almost yelled. Summer backed up slowly, creating distance between us. I pace back and forth trying to calm my nerves but the more I thought about it, the angrier I became. "You know Summer, I don't know what has gotten into you lately but you just aren't the same Summer I married eight years ago. Ever since you got into Cup it's been constantly about racing, I've always been second choice! I've tried to be supportive, I've tried to be understanding but I have to draw a line at some point. I've had enough of being second in your life!"
| e n d -
s u m m e r l y n 's
p o v|
"Thanks for the offer brother, but Theo and I are fine," I said, plastering on the most convincing smile that I could make up. "Let's talk racing, I need to get in the racing mindset."
"Alright, hit Busch out of the way. Make sure you use the bottom till the top comes in, don't be the first one to go to the top, don't make any mistakes on pit road and you'll be just fine. Hope that was enough racing talk for you."
"What would I ever do without you?" I rolled my eyes.
"SBM, get strapped in," Jimmie called out. "I'll be over in a second."
After a long and grueling race, we ended up in the top five. It was not where I wanted to finished with the car we had today, but we took it as a positive. Our race car was in one piece, lead a ton of laps, and gained a lot of stage points but I wanted to win more than anything.
I headed back to the motor home by myself, needing space from everything and everyone. I changed out of my fire suit and started to pack up the motor home. The door swung open about an hour later, Theo walked in carrying the first place trophy. He sets it down on the granite counter top with an echoing thud that captured my attention.
"Would it kill you to come to victory lane and congratulate me?" Theo questions leaning against the counter.
"Don't start this Theo," I replied walking past him, but he caught my arm, stopping me. "What Theo?"
"Where is the Summer I fell in love with? I don't know where she is but I miss her so damn much. Summer, I love you a lot but something is missing between us and I wanna figure it out because god knows I can't live without you. I feel like it's just me in this relationship."
