no one said it would be easy

Chapter 21 - my girlfriend

Izzie

"Nathan..", I say, trying to shut the door quickly, so he won't see the mess Casey is right now. "I didn't know you would be here, too."

"Yeah, you wouldn't be here if you knew, am I right?", he tries to take a look over my shoulder, trying to see what went on behind closed doors.

"Is she here, too?", he asks blantly. Nathan doesn't even say her name, but we both know to damn well who he's talking about.

"What do you want? I really don't want to deal with your bullshit right now", I roll my eyes out of frustration. Casey and I shouldn't have showed up to this party.

Nathan focuses his eyes on me again, examining my face and trying to read it.

I take a closer look on him. His hair is a bit longer and he has grown a beard... if you can call it like this. He's wearing this stupid chino trousers like always, with a white shirt stuffed in that reads "take me away".

"So?", I ask him again.

He shakes his head slightly before saying: "She's drunk in there, isn't she?"

"Let me see her, maybe I can help", he proposes and for a split second this actually sounds like a good idea. Nathan always helped me with my mom and it would be so easy to give away some control.

I shut my eyes and I try my absolute best to suppress the urge to cry. I don't want to cry. I can't cry. I won't.

I open my eyes again, and they aren't teary anymore.

"No", I tell him.

"Why?", he pushes his head forward with his eyebrows furrowed in disbelief.

"Because I'm taking care of her. So if you allow me, I'd like to get Casey some wate-", I say as I try to push myself past him, but he stops me by abruptly grabbing me by my wrist, forcing me to take look at him again.

"Izzie...", he lowers his voice, but somehow he's still so loud, "Let me help you. I heard about you and your mom. Do you really think this", he makes a gesture to the door that's separating Casey from us, "will help you to get through this? That she will help you to see your siblings again? You're making a mistake by letting her deeper into your life. God, you got from one problem into the next one!"

I snatch my hand out of his grip, but instead of walking a step back I get closer to him. So close, that our noses almost touch and I can smell what he's been drinking this evening.

"Listen here, Nathan", I practically spit into his face. I feel a light pressure behind my right eye, like I always do when I'm furious.

"You may think she's a problem, and yeah, maybe she is. Maybe she is a problem - for you!", I poke my finger into his chest and I hope it hurts at least a little bit.

"Are you really thinking I'm not knowing what you are trying to do? You're such a manipulative piece of shit. You're trying to get a hold onto me again, aren't you? Well, let me tell you, the only mistake I ever made is trusting you."

"Izzie I-", he starts and lays his hands on my shoulders, trying to gain some distance between us.

I take a few steps back and try to breath normally, but it's hard to do so, when you feel like your head is under water.

I continue without hesitation or the slightest tone of insecurity in my voice:  "And if you dare to speak to my girlfriend, I will tell your mom you're driving her Mercedes drunk. She sure as hell would like to hear this about you."

He looks at me in shock and the door flings open, a completely destroyed Casey stumbling out of the room.

~~~

Casey

"Nathan", I breathe, clinging to the door handle, like it's my dear life.

"The fuck do you want here?", I say. It's only then I realize Izzie is standing in front of him, looking uncomfortable, yet strong.

I hate the fact he's here. If only he had a drink I could bop, but it would probably land on Izzie too, and I don't want to cause any more trouble.

Nathan opens his mouth, already beginning to speak, when Izzie cuts him off by saying: "He actually wanted to leave right now."

Nathan shuts his mouth, head hanging low as Izzie walks past him, grabbing my hand and intertwining our fingers. She turns her back on him, pulling me after her.

Izzie is pushing a strand of loose hair behind my ear, looking at me with caring eyes: "Come on babe, we have to get you out of this party."

A soft smile curls my lips.

She called me Babe.

In front of that asshole.