My Baby// Colby Brock

Chapter Ten

-A couple of weeks later-
-Astrids POV-

I'm starting to get a tiny bump and Colby is more than happy it seems, even with everything going on. Colby and I need to go grocery shopping, I think, as I search the fridge for something to eat.

"Colby!" I yell.

"What!" He yells back.

"We need to go grocery shopping!" I yell. He comes running into the kitchen.

"Okay, I'll go ask Sam if he can watch Rosie and Elias," He jogs out of the apartment. I feel a slight pain in my abdomen but swiftly ignore it. Colby jogs back in.

"Sam says they can watch them," He says with a smile, he gets close to me, and puts one hand on my belly, then presses his lips into mine. 
"Rosie! Elias! Ready to visit uncle Sam!" They come running out, Elias has settled in and has become accustomed to his life here with us and with his mom. Colby hugs me and then bends down to kiss my tummy. I smile. We take the kids over to Sam and Kat's and then we head out to the store. We walk into the cleaning section and I go to grab a package of magic erasers and the pain in my abdomen becomes so great that I bend over and grasp at my stomach. Colby rushes over.

"Are you okay?" I'm hunched over and I shake my head. I look up, and Colby's face is anxious. After that it was like everything was in slow motion I was falling into Colby's arms, and when I wake up I'm in a hospital bed.

"Colby?" I manage to squeak out. He lifts his head from my hands. He kisses me. His eyes are bright blue and puffy, his cheeks are wet with tears.

"What happened?" I ask. His eyes start to well up.

"We lost- we lost the baby." He says crying. My eyes start to well up. This can't be happening.

"What?!" I say. His face scrunched up and more tears started to fall down his face.

-Back at the apartment-

"The doctor says that you are on bed rest. You need to take it easy." Colby orders.

"Where are the kids?"

"At Sam's, I asked if they could stay the night, he said that was fine." I sigh.

"Why did this happen? I don't understand-" Colby shushes me, and hugs me.

"I know, I know, it's okay." I wasn't sure if everything was going to be okay, or how I would ever recover from losing my baby. I've never felt hurt this deep.

-Colby's POV-

I never thought I could feel this amount of hurt in my life. I felt bad for Astrid, she was so excited to be a mom. I heard banging on the front door, I look to Astrid as she faces the window, I walk over to the door the banging was incessant. I open the door to find Rosie.

"Rosie, what are you doing here?"

"I don't want to stay at uncle Sam's! I want to be with you daddy!" I smile slightly and hug her. I didn't know how much I needed that until she hugged me. I pick her up.

"I know baby, but Astrid isn't feeling well." Rosie starts to cry as Sam runs over to us. 

"Rosie, what are you doing here?!" Sam says in his authoritative voice. Rosie then buries her head deeper into my chest. I sigh.

"How is Astrid feeling?" Sam asks. 

"The doctor says she has to take it easy, but emotionally she is really upset." Sam nods his head.

"I get that, I can't imagine losing my munchkin. Or Rosie, she's like a daughter to me." I nod. A tear escapes my eye. I can't imagine losing Rosie either, her or Elias. The tear falls and lands on Rosie's head.

"Ya know Sam, I was really excited. I love having kids." Sam gives me his sympathy look. I look down at Rosie and she is fast asleep in my arms.
"I think it's okay Sam, Rosie will probably just sleep, if Elias wants to come back tell him he can," I say and Sam nods and he walks back to his apartment. I walk over to Rosie's room and lay her down on her bed. I watch her sleep for a bit, but then I hear a knock on the front door again, I open it to see Elias. 

"I want to come back, dad." I smile and nod. Elias walks in and heads straight for Rosie and his room. I walk in behind him and tuck him in, I kiss him goodnight and exit the room. I walk back to Astrid. She's curled up in bed, crying, I curl up next to her.

"I'm so sorry baby." 

"I can't do it, Colby." 

"Do what?"

"Live. Not without my baby."

"Babe, you have Rosie, Elias, and me to live for."

"I'm not their mother, and I never will be, they know their mother. I don't feel like I have a place here. When I found out I was pregnant I thought, this is it! I will have a place and my own kid with the man I love. And when you told me I lost the baby...I lost everything."

"You still have me, and Rosie and Elias are as much yours as they are mine." She sits up, and I sat up next to her.

"No, Colby, they're not. You are their biological father, I am just the lady who lives here. They call me Astrid because they already have a mom, I want to be called mom more than anything in the world. But I've lost it, I've lost the chance." I look at her in confusion.

"Astrid, we can try again, you can be a mom." She shakes her head.

"Colby you don't get it, when I was a teenager the doctors told me that I had a lower chance than average to have a baby on my own. With my own eggs. So that was probably my only shot at being a mom." I sat there surprised, and a wave of anger washed over me.

"Why didn't you tell me this! You knew I wanted more kids!" 

"I'm sorry Colby!" I got up off the bed, I can't bring my eyes to meet hers. I'm so infuriated, she had many chances to tell me that she might not be able to have kids. Before we got married, while we were dating, so many chances!
"Where are you going!" Astrid yelled in confusion.

"To my kids," I say in a low voice, I exit our room and walk across the hall to Rosie and Elias's room. I open the door slowly and get in bed next to Rosie, she curls up into my chest.

-The Next Morning-

I wake up and Rosie is still fast asleep. I slowly get out of bed and enter our room to see Astrid. I open the door and she isn't there. I check the bathroom and she isn't there, I check the whole apartment, I went upstairs but she was nowhere to be found. I grab my phone and she doesn't answer. I left her a bunch of messages, texts, and voicemails. But she never replied. I walked down the stairs and saw that on the counter was a note.

Dear Colby,

I'm sorry I lied to you and didn't tell you that I have a fertility issue.
I know you wanted more kids, but I was scared and in love. I'm leaving you this note in hopes that it will give you some peace of mind, I am currently in the works of getting divorce papers.
You deserve better than me, someone who can give you more kids and a happier life. I'm sorry for lying all this time, I know I could have told many times.

I love you and I always will. But this is goodbye, for good,

Astrid

I start to cry knowing that this was all my fault. If I hadn't been an asshole to her she would have stayed. This is all my fault...

TO BE CONTINUED....