Worship in the Bedroom [Cake]

1

Calum's not like, religious, or anything. He'll say he believes in heaven and god and all that if someone asks, but he doesn't. He thinks when you're dead, you're dead. There isn't some holy divine afterlife, there a coffin with nails in the ground and that's it. Nothing else happens.

Michael's the same exact way, they'd discussed it over a bowl and a bag of cheetos one night. Albeit, Michael doesn't care what people think if him. He tells people immediately when they ask what comes after death, "A fat load of nothing, which is better than this anyway." Calum would probably be that bitter if his parents dumped him off at a friend's house and hit the high roads, living it up in Santa Barbara or Peru or wherever this months postcard screams out.

Ashton, on the other hand, is a little more laid back and happy. No, maybe happy isn't the word, because Ashton is just as bitter as Michael when he wants to be. Maybe content is a better word to describe him, or enlightened. Ashton has this firm belief in place that he's going to stumble open some grand staircase and see angels and puffy white clouds in the afterlife.

"God's not there," Ashton had explained. "God is dead. But the afterlife is alive."

Michael had piped up then, eager to murder every single one of hs boyfriend's dreams. "You're going to hell. The Bible says so."

"The Bible is fanfiction, Mike," Ashton had replied, unabashed, bringing the cigarette up to his kiss bitten red lips and passing it off to Calum before letting the smoke out with his words. "Think about it. They saw some famous guy being nice to some kids and depicted him as the son of their only governmental system. They wrote ut down, accidentally threw some of their own morals in there because it was just a personal story to them, and suddenly it took off."

Calum had paused, considering that and watching his cigarette burn until it was crumbling pieces of ash. "Like 50 Shades of Grey."

Ashton had smiled at him, all lopsided and happy, and said, "Like 50 Shades of Grey."

Michael disagrees with every single thing that comes out of Ashton's mouth, every religion based statement that rolls off his tongue like music. Calum thinks its mainly out of spite at this point, they way Michael snipes at him.

"While I agree with you as a being because you give amazing blowjobs, everything you've said in the past fifteen minutes is a complete lie," Michael had said after Ashton had explained his entire religious opinion to Calum. Ashton had rolled his eyes and pressed a chaste kiss to Michael's cheek, like a mother giving their child some much needed attention. Michael hadn't said much after that.

But Michael and Ashton aren't the point. The point is, Calum's not religious. He can respect Ashton's staircase scenario and agree with Michael's protests, but it doesn't matter to him. A floating man in the sky isn't going to change the fact that Calum's going to live and Calum's going to die.

He wishes he could say that all changes when he meets Luke, but it doesn't.

It starts when he sees a pretty barbie looking boy in the cafeteria, bowed over his steaming soup. Upon closer inspection, Calum finds that the boy's hands are squeezed together tightly, knuckles white with force, and his eyes are squeezed shut, pink splattering across them. The curve of his spine is straight and bent all at once, leaning over his so orange tray so his nose is almost in his bowl. His pale pink lips are moving slightly, letting out whispered tones almost frantically.

"Is he praying?" Michael scoffs loudly, making the boy jump slightly. His lips squeeze shut for a slight second before he's whispering again, eyes squeezed shut and hands clasped even tighter than before.

Calum hops off his stool, ignoring Michael's loud, "Hey!", and trots over to the trembling boy sitting alone in the university cafeteria, earning sideways looks and whispered scoffs. Once he gets close enough, he hears what the boys saying and almost walks away again.