Scarred: would you guys still love me if I were a catgirl?
ET: WITHOUT A DOUBT
I get lifted: you could join the girl clique at our sleepovers
Scarred has changed Aoyama's name to Little Star:
Little Star: MAGNIFIQUE 💞
Woke: I'm hesitant but I love you so I agree
Slep: as a cat person, and your boyfriend, I think you know the answer to that
Scarred: 👀
The90s: Wowwwww, you meow like a cat! That means you are one, right? Shut the fuck up. If you really want to be put on a leash and treated like a domestic animal then that's called a fetish, not "quirky" or "cute". What part of you seriously thinks that any part of acting like a feline establishes a reputation of appreciation? Is it your lack of any defining aspect of personality that urges you to resort to shitty representations of cats to create an illusion of meaning in your worthless life? Wearing "cat ears" in the shape of headbands further notes the complete absence of human attribution to your false sense of personality, such as intelligence or charisma in any form or shape. Where do you think this mindset's gonna lead you? You think you're funny, random, quirky even? What makes you think that acting like a fucking cat will make a goddamn hyena laugh? I, personally, feel extremely sympathetic towards you as your only escape from the worthless thing you call your existence is to pretend to be an animal. But it's not a worthy choice to assert this horrifying fact as a dominant trait, mainly because personality traits require an initial personality to lay their foundation on. You're not worthy of anybody's time, so go fuck off, "cat-girl".
Scarred: eye-
Woke: iida what dat autocorrect do doe 😩😩
The90s: you know what? I stand by it
Phrog: are you catgirl-phobic?
SEROtonin: wow, around a frog girl too
The90s: to be one due to a quirk is different
Scarred: that's what I'm saying tho
Scarred: not going to walk around wearing cat ears and meowing I got bullied enough
Slep: oh mood
I get lifted: "traumatic childhood check!!!" -todoroki
The90s: this class is a disaster
ET: subject change!!! Truth or dare time
Slep: haha no 💞🤤
I get lifted: you emoting strikes the fear of god
Scarred: similar to a look from aizawa
I get lifted: todoroki is making a face
Scarred has changing Todoroki's name to conspiracist
Conspiracist: fishy
Scarred: I don't think so
Woke: if both you and shinso are subconsciously adopted by aizawa doesn't that make you siblings
Scarred: do you ever say anything useful
SEROtonin: DAMMMMMMN
Scarred: Mina t or d idec anymore
ET: dare cmon
Invis: oh? Worm?
Scarred: I dare you to read the rules of monopoly to the class as your English essay as seductively as possible
Woke: holy shit
ET: eye-
Slep: odds on mic thinking it slaps lo-fi
Invis: OMGGG
I get lifted: dude you killed her
SEROtonin: maaaaan that's rough
SEROtonin: I'll get it on vid
ET: NO
Stop changing my fucking name: bet
ET: ,,,,,,,,
ET: yo Iida t or d
The90s: absolutely not
Mom: play nice
The90s: truth
ET: so if Deku is Harry are you and Uraraka Ron and Hermione?
I get lifted: aren't they in love
ET: yes
Mom: oh
AUX:
Invis: OH??? WORM???
The90s:
The90s: I suppose so
Woke: WORM
ET: TEA??????
Conspiracist; oh shit lol
Stop changing my fucking name: WATCH YOUR FUCKING LANGUAGE ICYHOT THATS MY BRAND
ET: mans really invented swearing huh
I get lifted: I'm actually shocked todoroki knows what a swear is
Phrog: you're really ignoring the issue at hand aren't you
I get lifted: hands??? Haha yeah todoroki is the hand crusher
ET: I bet you want Iida to crush ur hand 😍
Invis: AJDJDJKSJEJSKD
Woke: OWAHHH
RockTheDwayne: you really went for her
I get lifted: n e ways
The90s: I am confused as to what you are all insinuating at current
Scarred: oh fuck off you are
Woke: I'm betting Shinsou felt tremors with that one
I get lifted: I mean probably it's not every day Deku swears
Scarred: it's not
Scarred: it's every minute
Scarred: I am kacchan incarnate except I know OwO to make an impact
The90s: owo?
Stop changing my fucking name: I don't know what to be more mad at
Scarred: Chile anyways 🤤
Scarred: Iida, uraraka, kiss
Slep: my man kinda do be a matchmaker
Woke: you say that as if we didn't have to listen to mido blasting lovesick girls for a month before it got to that point
Slep: hush
Slep: yo denki meet me outside
Woke: dare
Slep: ??
Slep: I dare you to do twerk to the most morbid song you know
I get lifted: I'm going offline for a bit
The90s: as am I
Scarred: WWWWWWWWWW
Slep; is that for the win or the laughs
Scarred; :)
Woke: if I twerk to something morbid my reputation as a hero will be tarnished
Woke: you can't just twerk depression away Shinsou
ET: you can damn well try
Phrog: I don't think that's what he was getting at
Slep: fine then twerk to the alphabet idfk
Scarred: why do you want to see him twerk so bad
Invis: the way I'm cackling
Scarred: off to blast Heather 💅
Slep: meet me in the pit
Slep: the pit being your room
Stop changing my fucking name: get a room
Slep: I'm trying?
Phrog: I'm sorry but the image of anyone twerking to the alphabet seems genuinely concerning
Scarred: what if he twerked to Mina's Lo-fi reciting of the monopoly rules
ET: YES MAKE IT A WHOLE PERFORMANCE
AUX: I'll try to contribute
Woke: jiro t or d
AUX: d obv
Woke: dare you to call aizawa and say ur pregnant
Woke: and use whatever his reaction is as a basis for a song
Scarred:
AUX:
Invis:
Phrog:
Scarred; are you the father then or???
AUX: I'm pretty sure aizawa is convinced I'm a lesbian?
Scarred: if we're going to say something that crazy it should at least be realistic
AUX: who wants to be my pretend boyfriend for a while
Scarred: this sounds wattpad
AUX: shh, none of these dares are happening now we have to plan
Scarred; you've spent a lot of time around deep since the festival just use him
SEROtonim: I (regretfully) consent
AUX: I don't want to do this
————————————————
Yell: and then I dropped my cake on Vlad's brand new shoes
Yell: and he had the audacity to ask me to pay for the cleaning
Yell: bitch??? You're in a pasta restaurant and you think you can get away with not getting sauces???
Yell: I know you're reading this vlad
Dont: get over it, no use crying over spilt sauce
Vlad:
BDSM: GETTEM
Vlad: why does everyone come for me
ALLMIGHT: I believe it is because you are, as the kids say, easy to bully
BDSM: we say it with love :)
Yell: nope x
Dont: no
Dont: hold on I'm getting a call
——————————
Shouta stared at his phone for a second, unimpressed, and braced himself for what was to come. Jiro was supposedly one of the responsible students so it was only logical that if she were calling them there'd be an emergency. Just what he needed.
He picked up.
"Hey, sensei?"
"What did he do?"
"What?"
"What did Midoriya do?"
"Nothing I'm calling about me...?"
"What."
"..."
"Spit it out."
"I'm pregnant."
"No you're not."
"No, really, I am. I don't know what to do."
"Stairs are always an option *click*"
With that the call ended, and so did Jiro's recording.
———————————————-
AUX: that went about as well as you could've expected
AUX: he didn't believe me
Scarred: :(
Woke; you should play it up more in class
AUX: no
Woke: make it seem like you don't know the father
AUX: I am not becoming a soap opera for you amusement
Scarred: :(
Woke: ;(
YOU ARE READING
Very Funny, Very Good, My Hero Chatfic
FanfictionI wrote this as a joke and somehow it got views so I'm continuing. It's crack, it's OOC, it's silly, but most of all it's self indulgent :) Yet another BNHA chatfic! Featuring a more chaotic Deku, rarepairs, and outdated/unfunny jokes. Manga spoiler...
