I am currently locked in the bathroom. My dumbass thought twisting the key until you can't anymore is a good idea, so now here I am, looking at the door, hoping Vinnie is gonna come back from whatever shit he had to do.
"I wonder if Alexa could hear me from here," I say, looking around.
"ALEXA PLAY F/A!" I yell out
...
Nothing. Great.
"I ain't never see two pretty best friends, It's always one of them gotta be ugly," I bang on the door like it's gonna magically say 'yes master' and open.
At this point, I had to jump from the tiny window that was above the toilet. The only problem was that my ✨Fat Juicy Gigantic Ass✨ can't really fit through it.
"Baby I'm home!" I hear Vinnie yell from downstairs.
"Vinnie!" I yell.
I could hear him walking upstairs as a big smile grew on my face. Fucking finally.
"Where are you?"
"In the bathroom."
"Oh, may I?" he knocks on the door.
"Dumbass I locked myself here."
He just starts laughing. I mean yeah it was funny but still.
"How?" he continues laughing.
"I just twisted the key too much and now it's stuck," I whine.
He takes his time with laughing at me then lets out a big breath and clears his throat.
"Try wiggling the key a bit but don't pull it."
I grip the key and wiggle it. Still stuck.
"No that's it come outside cuz I'm jumping out the window," I say and open the tiny window.
"Wait y/n!" he knocks on the door.
"Fuck that," I slide my upper body through it.
I saw one of our neighbors looking at me and I smile back, waving at them. She rolls her eyes and continues watering her plants.
Fucking boomer ass bitch with a dead coochie.
I could hear Vinnie running downstairs then out of the house. I watch him as he arrives right under the window. (if that make sense)
"Be careful okay?" he looks up at me.
"Oh no I wanna fall and die you know."
There was some distance between the window and the ground but with enough luck I'll fall on Vinnie and crush his bones, but he'll be fine.
"I'll catch you!" he opens his arms as I slide my ass through the window.
"Dear barbz this might be the end thank you all!" I yell then jump right in Vinnie's arms.
He caught me but fell down with me on top of him. I smile and kiss his cheek before getting up.
"Get yourself a Vinnie Hacker for emergencies like these," I bow to the wall as if it was a camera.
"Fuck," he groans, getting up.
"You good?"
"Yeah you just fell on my chest," he rubs his chest.
"Thanks for catching me," I say and walk inside the house.
-page 018
hi im back lol anyways um i think biden won so congrats lets forget that trump exists 👏👏
