Help me Tom riddlexreader

Chapter 5

TW suicidal thoughts self cutting blood rape slight smut

I quickly pushed Tom away after he kissed me, "Tom, do you really mean that?" "I do," he said as he slid he hand around my lower back. For the first time in my life, a mans touch didn't make me flinch, or want to move away. I wanted him to be mine and I wanted everyone to know he was mine, and that I was his. But I couldn't, I practically promised Sirius that I wouldn't be involved with Riddle. "I can't Tom, I promised, and I'm not the right person to be in a relationship right now, I don't know, I just can't right now," I said in between breaths. Tom sighed. "Fine then, will you at least tell me your last name?," I sighed then waited a moment. I shrugged. "Lestrange," as I said that, his eyes widened. "As in Bellatrix and Rodolphus Lestran-" I held my hand up for him to stop and nodded. "Yes Tom my mother killed a lot of people, but that doesn't make her a bad person, she was a good person who made the wrong choices" and with that I ran off. I was getting tired of this. Living. Having to feel. I'm ready to go.

Tom.

What about him? I couldn't leave him could I?
Sirius either. I love him so much, I can leave him either.
Sunny, my baby sister. I can't leave her alone, she needs me. I need her, she is the only thing keeping me alive, because I could just write my cousin, Tom, Sarah, Maria, my aunt, and Albus a Letter, and then take my knife and just die. Maybe I could drown myself in the black lake. Die peaceful. No, no, no.
My baby sister. I just need to cut something. I-I I need to.

I ran down to the common room. It was 2 am. No one will be up not even Tom. I grabbed a pocket knife I had found in riddles room, don't ask how I managed to grab it. I went there and sat on the floor.

I opened the knife up and placed it against my skin. The blade felt cold. I pushed down and
swiped, making a cut along my forearm.

Red liquid started emerging from the wound.
I made another one under it. More blood came rushing to the scene. I looked at my right forearm and made a large gash. I took the towel I had brought with me so I wouldn't get blood on the floor, and placed it under me.
This wasn't a good place to do it I thought.
I started crying.
Why why did I feel the need to do this?
Why can't I be like other people, who had happy childhoods and good life's. I started sobbing.
I heard footsteps. No no no! Sarah or Maria must have heard me come downstairs. I sat on the couch and used the towel to cover my arms I grabbed a blanket to also cover it. But I couldn't hide my tears, they just kept coming. I looked up to see the one and only, Tom Riddle.

"Tom? What are you doing here?" I said with my voice cracking. He looked at me concerned and confused. "I was coming to get my books I woke up and remembered them just now," he looked at me for a moment before saying, " what are you doing here?"

I looked like a little kid that had been caught sneaking cookies

"I um" I stuttered "You aren't hiding a book about darks arts under that blanket are you," he reached for the blanket while smirking , "wait don't," I was to late he pulled off the blanket and saw the bloody towel. He looked shocked. He grabbed the towel. My efforts to hold it didn't work, he was too strong. He saw the cuts with blood still coming out. "I-I can e-explain please T-Tom I-," "what the bloody hell, y/n? You've been cutting yourself? All this time? Why?"
"You don't understand Tom, I need to, its my fault," tears started coming from My eyes, "I should have told someone" I started balling "but I didn't, I couldn't, he didn't let me, he hurt me Tom. And then when I did, that man hurt me he said it was my fault, it was, Tom, my fault, I did this" I said in between sobs Tom just stood there before picking me up and just holding me. "Tom, I-I" "shh, I'm here, baby, don't worry I'm gonna make them pay, just tell me their names," "no he'll hurt her, I can't let him hurt her," "my little tiger, who's her?," "my sister," I started cry at the thought of Steve hurting her. "Baby, you got to tell me who hurt you and who said it was you fault, please, baby,"