my girl crush

12th

POV ADDISON

I was in the cafeteria and was eating my lunch as Derek sat down next to me.
He was looking at me and I could see the big question mark in front of his forehead.

I get annoyed by his presence.

The whole day I was thinking about my feelings I couldn't classify.

Because I didn't want to kiss Derek but thinking about kissing Meredith made me feel crazy.

Crazy in a way that my heart rate was running, I got sweaty and distracted and even in a way attracted and hot.

"Are you about to answer me?"
Derek asks.

Shit I was distracted by thinking of the effect it gives me if Meredith would kiss me.
I didn't even noticed that he was talking to me.

"Oh I - I'm sorry"
I tried to sound calm and not to flush.

"What's wrong with you?
I mean first you followed me to Seattle and wanted to fix our marriage and now I'm ready - but it seems like you don't want to give us another chance anymore."

I sighed.
He was right. I guess.

"I'm sorry Derek. I don't know what's wrong with me. I - I - I can't"
I was sobbing.

I stood up and ran away.
I hid myself in an empty patient room and cried until I fell asleep.

__________

"Addison? Hey you're ok?"

I heard a quiet voice.

"Oh Meredith. Yes, yes I'm - fine, thanks."

"Oh honey, you're totally not fine. I can see that, because I care about you."

"I don't want to burden you with my problems." I was still sobbing.

She walked towards me and sat down next to me on the bed and started to draw little circles on my back with her hand.

"Oh sweetheart you can tell me everything and I'm there for you. Even if you've kissed me and don't want to talk ever again about it. I'm still there for you. I promise."

I got flattered and I hope she wouldn't notice how that I sat downright when she mentioned our kiss and my heart began to beat faster than normal.

I looked thankfully at her, but had to look right away because I could only stare at her perfect lips.

We sat a while without anyone saying anything.

Out of nothing Meredith cleared her throat and started talking.

"I liked it. Actually, I loved it."

"And by 'it' you mean Derek?
I gave him free. You can have him."

"No, silly" she laughed.
And I was confused?
What did she loved?

"And then what do you mean?"
I asked her.

She looked straight into my eyes and I started to get nervous.

"By 'it' I meant that."

She leaned in and looked deep into my eyes.

"I meant our first kiss."

I went crazy. Crazy for her.

I felt the strong tension between us and the blood rushed through my veins straight into my cheeks.

She came closer and
finally
I
felt
her
lips
on
mine
again.

And now I knew. That was what I wanted the whole time. That's why I couldn't let Derek kiss me. And why I couldn't talk to him.

Deep inside, I was aware of what I'm feeling for Meredith and therefore I felt guilty in front of Derek.

But now nothing matters.
Because I'm kissing her.
And that's all I want to do.

First the kiss was slow but it got needier and hotter by the time and Merediths hands were knotted up at my hair.
And I let my hands traveling down her shoulders and arms and stopped at her waist.

There was a electricity between us and every time she was touching me or I touching her I felt those sparkles.
And she must felt them too, because there were goosebumps all over her arms.

Her hands traveled down, too. They traveled down to my lower back and she grasp my ass.

"Ouh my gosh, Meredith-
please don't stop!"
I begged.

"I won't"
she said with a husk voice.

She grabbed my ass again and I returned the favour by pinching her ass.

"oooah"
she moaned.
That turned me on even more
and I pulled her completely on the bed.
She was lying on top of my so I turned her around and I was on top.

"Do you mind having unforgettable sex in this patient room?"
I asked with a seduced voice and she shook her head to denying.

I smirked, thinking of what I could do for her, if I knew she is kinky.