Hey guys! So, I realize it's been exactly a week since I've updated, and I'm super sorry! I got caught up with a non fiction book I'm writing about my life, and another random book I'm writing. If you want to read the non fiction book it's called Fostered.
Real quick; I just want to thank all my fans, and everyone who reads this book! You guys are awesome!
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Eerie silence floods the car. I ended up riding with Anthony, because Ryker had to go home before going to the store. Anthony offered to drop me off.
Anthony breaks the silence with a cough, “So, you own a bookstore?”
I tap my fingers on my thighs. “Yeah. I’m really sorry about not mentioning it before, I just didn’t think it was a big deal.. I mean, I would have mentioned it if I thought it was important or would affect us in any way. But as it was, I didn’t think it would matter. I totally get that you’re mad, I would be too, but-“
Anthony cuts me off mid-sentence, “I’m not mad.”
I gasp for air, “I want you to know,- wait what?”
He turns the car at an intersection, “I’m not mad.”
I furrow my eyebrows in complete confusion, “How are you not mad? Everyone else but you knew about a huge part of my life… I don’t understand.”
He chuckles, “If you didn’t think it was important enough to mention then I trust your judgment, Rae.”
Wait, what? Is he even human? Every person in their right mind would be hopping mad if they were in his situation… but he’s not. Why? And, even more confusing, why am I not extremely happy he’s not mad? Because I’m not happy, I’m just really confused.
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“How did it go with Anthony? Did he yell at you?” Ryker asks as he pulls books from the back of the store. I pull my hair up and sigh through my nose.
“No, he didn’t. He didn’t even care.” I retrieve a couple of copies of Treasure Island and balance them on my knee while digging through older classics.
Ryker removes his head from the closet, his eyes clearly gray with confusion as he looks at me, “He didn’t care that you didn’t tell him about the biggest part of your life?”
I shake my head, strands of hair falling from my messy ponytail, “No. And I don’t know what to make of that. I know I should be grateful, but it’s like he’s too…” I search my vocabulary for a word to describe him and come up short.
“Perfect?” Ryker suggests, sticking a book on top of his head.
I nod vigorously, “Yeah, he’s so perfect. And, I don’t know how to act around him. I mean, we’re nothing like each other. He’s sweet, I’m snarky. He’s shy, I’m… well, I’m shy too. But he’s popularly shy. I’m just painfully shy. He’s forgiving, and I’m…” I scrunch up my face, “Not.”
Ryker fake pouts, “But you’re so cute together!”
I punch him in the arm, “I know. I really like him, I just don’t know that it’s going to work, ya know?”
He nods and I stand up with my stack of books to put on the shelves of the bookstore. My thoughts carry me through the store, and to the shelves where I restock books, not even noticing what I’m doing really. When I get engulfed in my mind, it’s hard to resurface sometimes.
I shove a book as hard as I can in a shelf and breathe heavily. I don’t know what to do. I can’t help but feel Anthony deserves better than me. Or at least someone different. More like him. But I really do like him, and I don’t want to break up with him. He’s so sweet, and I love that.
Maybe I’ll just wait it out.
We’ll see what happens.
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As soon as my feet hit the welcome mat on my front porch, I am smothered in a double bear hug from both of my parents.
“Woah, what’s up?” I mumble against my dad’s sweater. I’m pretty sure my right foot is going to be permanently damaged from the weight being pressed on it. Not to mention my ribs that are getting crushed.
“We’ve been worried about you since Ryker called last night,” my mom says rubbing my head with her hand not trapped between my abdomen and hers.
“You fainted?” My dad asks and releases me.
I suck in a huge gulp of air upon being let go and nod, “Yep. But I’m fine. I swear,” I try to scoot around them but my mom won’t let me.
“Do any of them know? About your eyes I mean?” She asks, her own eyes tinged with blue (concern).
“Nope,” I grind out, a little frustrated now. Why does it always come back to who knows and who doesn’t? I mean God forbid the neighbors next door find about my freaky eyes! Because we care what they think ß Inserted sarcasm here.
“Okay,” my mom says and finally lets me in the house. I book it upstairs and slam my door shut. I throw a bunch of food in Eyre’s cage and peel off my clothes. I start a shower and let the water flow over me, thinking about what my mom said on the porch.
None of my friends knows about my eyes. What would they do if they found out? Even worse, what would Anthony do if he found out?
Would it be like the bookstore thing, where he wouldn’t care? Or would he treat me as the insane freak I am and up and leave me?
I’d like to think it would be the first option, but you never know.
You would be surprised how fast people’s demeanors change the moment you start talking about things they don’t and can’t understand.
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Okay, so nothing huge happened this chapter... my bad. I just needed some stuff to slow down, and I needed some more Anthony stuff with Rae.
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And as always: Thank you for reading!!
~Juliana
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