Merlin Oneshots

Arrested by Airheads

It started with the simple things, long-running joke between Arthur and Merlin was one would call one a prat and the other would follow suit with idiot.  But a certain few did not see it this way.

It was Camelot after all, oddities were the norm so why shouldn't the Crown Prince be insulted by his oddly faithful manservant, it was Camelot.  Speaking of the oddities in Camelot, it was nearly comical to have a normal hunting trip where a group would return on schedule, so why did they return on time and what did it have to do with a handcuffed Merlin and Arthur?

It was all due to some misplaced prejudice that the manservant was an issue that needed to be fixed. 

Some knights noticed the world's luckiest manservant always caught a break, always had an escape route, always did something that was not in the norm for Camelot and kept surviving it rather than their friends.

Morteaus flower that kills everyone - Merlin survives.

Griffin attack - Merlin survhives it not once, but twice.

Serket sting that is fatal to any normal man - Seen on the manservant when he was bathing on a hunting trip.

Dragon attacks Camelot - Not to worry, the manservant can find the Last Dragonlord.

These were just a few of the very peculiar instances that circled around the manservant who always knew what was going on.  So, one thing led to another, and another, and another, and eventually to Merlin being "arrested" by some over zealous new knights, despite Arthur's very colorfully worded tirade, so the knights also handcuffed Arthur thinking he was enchanted.

As the very angry prince and the mildly annoyed manservant were dragged into the council chambers during a session, the boastful men announced they caught a sorcerer who enchanted the prince. 

Uther immediately dismissed the council, not even glancing at the concerned members and leveling a glare at the hesitant few who tried and failed to stay under such scrutiny.

Contrary to popular belief, Uther was not an idiot, had anyone missed it, the law banning magic has become a guideline at best.  Uther has even been paying the senior knights quietly to ignore, to free, or to transport magic users from Camelot to keep up alliances and pretenses. 

Arthur was also not an idiot, he knew there was something about Merlin from the day they met.  Simply being near Merlin made every fiber of his being feel alive, let alone whole as though Merlin was his other half.

One of the brave and idiotic knights decided to speak for his other 5 comrades, "Sire, we believe this sorcerer, has enchanted the Crown Prince so we brought them both to you."  The way he spat sorcerer had Uther nearly raging behind his cool facade, Merlin was the greatest protector of this kingdom and so help him if he broke that trust.

Uther leveled a glare at the idiots, "Now tell me why, in the seven hells, you lot decided to parade my son.  Your future king.  Through the heart of Camelot with his loyal manservant and why I should not have you all killed."  There was ice in his tone, Arthur jumped at it, he never heard this tone except for in dire circumstances, and Merlin as always, looked bored and was fiddling with the locking mechanism for his cuffs.  The knights on the other hand, the found out in an instant how terribly they messed up, but the leader of the idiots could not let the sorcerer stand, and walk away, now could he.

The foolish knight drew his sword and lunged for Uther, only to be stopped with a glance. 

Fury.  May the Cailleach have mercy for this poor misguided man.  The remaining five dropped to their knees with another glance, not even daring to challenge Merlin.

Merlin was beyond pissed, he was planning on explaining (magicing) away this whole situation, but no he just had to do something stupid. 

Merlin had suspicions of the Pendragon's awareness of his "talents" but by the unsurprised glance he got from both of them it simply confirmed it. 

Then, Uther spoke, "Sir Donahue of House Lark, you are hereby stripped of your title and sentenced to death by me, Uther Pendragon.  You have the choice to be executed in the square by pyre or by Merlin here, in the privacy of this room.  Decide your fate."

Had Merlin already not been planning to kill this man for the betterment of Camelot, he would have shown some surprise.  He was rattled from his thoughts by the voice of Donahue, trying and failing to keep calm.

"I choose Merlin, after all he is a filthy sorcerer and manservant, what could he do to me, I am a knight!"

Merlin calmly turned around, every pore of his being emanating power as he spoke into the man's ear, quiet enough to intimidate but loud enough to be heard by the others, "You were a knight.  Under the laws of Camelot you have chosen your fate.  Your execution will be completed by me, Merlin Ambrosius.  The Triple Goddess has sldecuded your soul, uponndeath on the physical plane shall be given to the Callieach for tampering with destiny.  Under the laws of the Old Religion, and by the will of the Teiple Goddess, I sentence you to death."  Merlin touched Donahue's temple, and his body appeared to fold in on itself as his soul was pulled from his chest.  An instant later, Donahue's body disintegrated and his soul vanished.

The remaining knights were frozen on their knees, as Arthur approached them, "Can you alter their memories so Donahue was killed on the hunting trip by bandits?"

With a noncommittal wave of his hand, the men collapsed into sleep and Merlin nodded at Arthur.

"So Merlin?"

"Yes prat?"

"You cannot call me that!"

"Sorry.  Yes my lord pratship?"  Merlin said with a mock bow and a wicked gleam in his eyes, before darting out of the room, Arthur stumbling behind him, closing the doors as he went.

Uther simply chuckled at the duo, they are such children, shaking head as he thought about the past hour of events, but Albion is one step closer to occuring, and all because of those airheads arresting Arthur and Merlin.