All That I Really Wanted (English Version)

In The Name Of Love

Hope was staring absently at Landon, still processing the story he had just told her. She had always known that he wasn't normal per se, but that he was a phoenix that literally couldn't die and that his father was Malivore himself, it was something a bit hard to believe. Even harder to believe was that Alaric had kept everything from her, making Landon pass for dead because he was wanted by an organization called the Triad and apparently the monsters from Malivore as well.

"Do you want to sit down?" Hope offered the boy, indicating the old couch in her room.

Landon couldn't help but smile as he sat up.

"Come on, sit down with me, to talk a bit"

Hope nodded, sat next to him, and turned to look at her. Thinking of the guilt that had led to knowing that someone else had paid the price for loving her with his life.

"Landon, I thought you were gone. If you only knew how it feels" She shook her head, wondering why he hadn't found a way to let her know that he was okay.

"Hope, I'm so sorry" he whispered, reaching out to take the tribrid's hands. "I never meant to hurt you"

He had learned in this time that sometimes pain was necessary in life to get what you wanted. When Dr. Saltzman proposed this plan to him, he knew that it would cause Hope a lot of pain, but he had held onto the belief that the end justifies the means and that the pain he caused Hope would be worth it once they were together.

The tribrid nodded, realizing their plan. Landon was willing that not only her, but everyone who cared for him would suffer all this time, thinking that he was dead.

"You didn't trust me enough to let me help you"

"I was trying to protect you, Hope. To all" the boy tried to explain "I know you. Hope. You would try to save me and everyone in this school, even if it would put your life in danger. "

While it's true that he liked that about her, the fact that she cared so much for him. But her life was the only thing he was not willing to risk. He had nothing, he only had Hope, so he didn't care what price he paid as long as he still had her.

Hope looked away from Landon. He had been afraid to let her help and Josie ...

"We aren't like that; we aren't those people who sit idly by when something bad happens"

She wishes Josie was there right now. Nothing felt impossible when she was with her. She sighed, turning her attention back to Landon, forcing herself to stop thinking about Josie and how much she missed her.

"I couldn't risk something happening to you"

"You know, it's kind of ironic to hear someone say that" it was always her who was trying to protect the people in her life and she couldn't explain to herself why something about this whole situation didn't sit well with her. She tries to give a reason to her feelings for both of them. "But I guess I'm not used to being the one who needs to be protected"

He gave her a smile so big that she looked down, uncomfortable that, although everything had changed for her, for Landon, things had remained the same as always. He had not experienced the world created by Argos, so they had not been able to leave things on the same place as they had before, where they were just friends. Like her and Lizzie. Lizzie. She laughed.

"I can't wait to see the expression on Lizzie's face when she finds out you're alive."

The smile left his face.

"They can't all know yet, not until we find Clarke"

Hope looked at him, knowing that there was a time, a few weeks ago for her, when she would have offered to stay in her room without a second thought. It would have seemed natural to offer him full protection. But now things were different. She frowned, wondering what Josie would think of Landon staying in her room. She would jump to the wrong conclusions before giving her a chance to explain herself and who knows maybe she would set Landon on fire.

When she didn't say anything, Landon looked at her confused. This was not the way he had imagined their reunion. Except for the hug he received when she saw him in the doorway, she had stayed away from him.

She looked away from him, assumed that when he "died" it must have caused her more pain than he thought and now, she was avoiding being hurt again. It was just a defence mechanism. But she didn't have to worry again, he promised silently, because nothing was going to separate them now. All he had to do was give her time for her to believe that.

"I know I shouldn't have come back yet, Hope. But I had to see you, no matter how dangerous it was. "

His words made the guilt accumulate in the tribrid's chest. He was right, it was dangerous. She rises to her feet, able to offer shelter.

"I think Rafa has a new roommate, so you can stay here, you'll be safe"

Landon smiled. There was a time when that smile had made her feel like the luckiest person in the world and she would have done anything to make Landon keep smiling at her like that. But that time is up. Everything had changed and she had to make sure he knew about it.

"Landon, I have to tell you, the things are different now and my life has become a little more ..." Maya entered the room "complicated"

Landon looked at the brunette.

"Landon, this is my new roommate, Maya."

"Hello, I'm Maya" she greeting

"Hello" said Landon

"Say hello to the next Alpha of the wolf pack" said the brunette.

"Listen, when I talked about fitting in, I didn't mean that," Hope said "Taking Raf's place as Alpha isn't mixing"

"I already told you, that I'm not willing to submit to a man, my inner feminist doesn't let me"

"I think I'll go see Raf" Landon said leaving the room.

"Maya, you'll only make the whole pack go against you" the tribrid tried to reason.

"They don't leave me a choice, I don't want to submit, so if I have to kick your friend's ass to don't it, I'll do that"

"Maya..."

"As I see it, I only have two options, they let me be the social pariah that you said I would become if I don't join or become alpha, besides what are you going to know about that if you aren't in the pack?" The brunette said before leaving the room.

Hope stayed there.

"Ha, what am I going to know? I'm a wolf with wolf parents, a wolf aunt, oh, right! and my wolf children" she complained in a low voice.

Her children who was gone. Realization hit her, along with a pain so deep in her chest that Hope thought she was having a heart attack. She had forgotten. For a brief moment, she thought that her children were there, that she could walk a few steps and she could hold them in her arms. In a fit of anger, she threw a chair against the nearest wall.

The sensation left her legs and she slid to the floor, resting her forearms on her knees and her hands dangling uselessly between them.

Tears welled up in her eyes and she threw her head back, breathing raggedly. Hope could see them clearly, their soft baby smiles, their children. Andy and Luke. What would she give to see her children, to hug them, just one more time?