𝙁𝙤𝙧𝙗𝙞𝙙𝙙𝙚𝙣 𝙇𝙤𝙫𝙚 : 𝘼 𝙎𝙩𝙖𝙧 𝙁𝙤𝙭 𝙎𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙮

𝘾𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙎𝙞𝙭: 𝘼 𝙎𝙤𝙣'𝙨 𝙍𝙚𝙛𝙡𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙃𝙞𝙨 𝙁𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧: 𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙩 𝙊𝙣𝙚

The rain was pouring down over the graveyard, which was unusual for the normally dry desert planet of Papatoon.
Not the slightest breath of wind rocked the scraggly nearly dead trees.
The graveyard was empty, not a living soul in sight, which wasn't very rare. Not many people visited this place. There was only one person buried here after all.

Fox sat on the small stone bench in front of his father's memorial, rereading the inscription. Tears streamed down his face, the pain fresh again after Wolf's revelation.

On October 5th, 2135, Corneria lost the greatest pilot in its recent history.
James McCloud, valiant leader and founder of Star Fox. He was a devoted husband to Vixy Reinard, loving father to their sons James Foxworth McCloud and Samuel Foxworth McCloud and a true friend to those who knew him.
His greatness will live on through his sons and the legacy of Star Fox.

Fox thought back abit, remembering the day his father left and never came back. Fox was sleeping in bed, his small body moving side to side in the middle of a night terror. He whimpered and sobbed in his sleep, gasping as he awoke, eyes wide and jumped out of bed, throwing the blankets off himself. He ran downstairs, seeing his father packing a small suit case for a new mission "Daddy!" He cried, running to his father and clinging to his leg.  "Don't go daddy! Don't leave! I-I had a bad dream! Y-you wont come back!" He sobbed. "I know you won't!" He hid his face in his father's leg. He sobbed harder as James picked him up and held him tight. "Hey, hey shhh shh....your Daddy's going to be okay Fox, alright? Don't you worry about me, I won't die." He said.
Samuel yawned and climbed down stairs "Mmn...Dad? Fox? What's wrong? Why are you crying like a baby?" He said annoyed.
James shushed Samuel and picked him up. "Shush Samuel, remember last year how you made Fox feel calling him names?" His son nodded sadly. "Okay, now I have to go on another mission. Now while I'm gone you two got to be good for your sitter, you got it?" He asked.
Samuel yawned and nuzzled his Dad. "Yes Dad, promise to come back?" He asked.
James chuckled and nuzzled his pup "I promise my little trouble maker." He said, nuzzling Samuel.
Fox still sobbed, whimpering.
James smiled and nuzzled Fox. "Hey, hey now, no more tears Fox, you and your brother's are the men of the house now till I come back now...okay?" He said.
Fox sniffled and nodded with a hiccup as James hugged his pups.  "I love you both my pups." He said.
"We love you too Dad." Samuel said hugging their father tightly.
Fox nuzzled him. "I love you Daddy, you've always been the best Daddy ever. When you see Mommy, tell her how much I love her and that she was the bestest Mommy ever."
"Okay sweetheart, I'll remember. But Mommy is in the afterlife now and I'm sure she knows how you feel every day."
After that he had set them on the floor and took them upstairs, tucked them in and then left, Peppy picking him up at the door.
It was the last time Fox saw his father.
And a few hours later, he woke up sobbing, knowing that his father was dead and would never tuck him in, or tell him goodnight or hug him ever again.

He sat straight and had the aura of someone you wouldn't want to mess with, which is until you saw his eyes. They were hollow, empty, and even if the rain did a good job of hiding it, you could still see the tears that fell down his face.
"I miss you." He whispered softly, still not tearing his eyes away from the tombstone. "I hope you know that."
He reached out with his hand and gently touched the stone with his fingers. A sob slipped out of him and he pulled his hand away again to wipe the tears off his face.
"I'm such a wimp. It's been fifteen years and I still can't come here without starting to cry." He wiped tears off his face again, then looked down at the ground. "But...I just miss you so much Dad... I begged you not to leave and you did it anyway."
Everything was still for several minutes as Fox continued to stare at the ground and got lost in his thoughts. Thoughts of what was and what could have been.
His father had a secret life, but if he were still alive then Wolf would still be with James, or would James have left him? What kind of man was James McCloud to have a secret boyfriend?
To hide something so important?
Was it the same as it was between himself and Krystal? If not, why weren't he and Samuel told about Wolf?
What harm could that have done?
It was like his father was two people.
One known and familiar, the other a stranger, an unknown personality.
Did James even love his kids? Had he loved his wife? Or was she just the extra? The person he had for looks and to flaunt to the media?
He felt all of these thoughts coalescing into one burning thought, one emotion stronger than all of the others.
Suddenly he looked up at the tombstone again and anger flashed over his eyes as he kicked the stone with all his might. The stone didn't give way, but neither did Fox. He didn't show any sign that it had hurt, despite the fact that his booted foot was throbbing.
"Why?!!" he screamed. "Why did you leave me?! Didn't you know how much I needed you?!" Tears flowed down his cheeks in a seemingly endless stream. "Samuel was fine without you!! But I wasn't!! I was the one who saw you die before you left!! I was the one who knew you were gone hours later!! I needed my Daddy to be there for me!! We loved you gods damn it!! Peppy went through the motions of raising us but he couldn't fill the role you left!! He tried, damn it he tried!! But he needed you!! You should never have left!! We were fucking orphans!!! What do you think that did to me?!! Losing my Mom and you only a year apart?!!! I'm shocked that I didn't grow up and become a drunk!! I was terrified to sleep!!! Thinking that I was going to lose Samuel or Peppy next!! I fucking needed you Daddy!!! My Daddy!! And now you're gone!! I just.... I want.... to hold you... hear you tell me you love me .... you're little Star Fox... I miss everything you were Dad... I'd give anything to have you tell me one more bedtime story... tuck me in... to just be a pup again when things weren't... so fucking screwed up and wrong... when everything was ... happy."
The anger visibly dissipated from him as he sobbed, then fell to his knees in front of the grave, his head bowed low and hands digging into the ground as if he was trying to hold on for dear life. Sobs raked his body as he sat in the empty graveyard, hidden away from the galaxy and for once able to let his defences fall.
To let all of the stress and pain out, the turmoil in his soul, the anxiety of hiding his sexuality from his team, from Peppy. The confusion he felt about dating the guy who used to screw his Dad. He felt anxiety having to meet in secret, hidden from others, always on edge , never knowing when the last time will be that they see each, tell each other 'I love you' or kiss.
After several long minutes , the sobs slowly ebbed away. Replaced by a silent stare, the stare of someone lost in their thoughts, lost in a whirl of pain and confusion. Of love and hate. His emotions were being pulled in so many directions that he felt as if he would splint into several copies of himself.
It made for an odd visual in his mind. One that he felt he should focus on, try to fix. But that was his problem wasn't it? He was always trying to fix everything. Friendships that were broken beyond repair, his team that always had to fight or question his authority, his decisions. Trying to fix Krystal's complex losses and newfound life as a member of Star Fox and citizen of Corneria. Trying to always make Peppy feel needed and wanted despite his advanced age. Always making Slippy know he important to the team no matter what Falco said.
Trying to fix the entire damn galaxy because of Andross. At one point having thought that he could fix Andross too.
Trying to fix everything wrong in the world, the inequities, the strife, the pain.
Always fixing others before himself.
That was something that he had to change. Had to get beyond. He couldn't be the savior to all. He sat in the lotus position and focused his mind, seeing the dozens of hims gathered around the tombstone. He examined each one carefully, then filed their issues into the farthest depths of his mind, to only be touched when necessary, if even ever again. One by one, each copy merged with the one next to it, until there was only one. The real, physical Fox McCloud who then opened his eyes.

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Word Count: 1,596
Song: Way Down We Go by Kaleo