Thomas and the Magic Railroad (Rewrite)

Chapter 4: Sneezing Powder

Mr. Conductor: [narrating] Far away on Sodor, the steam engines were confident, cheerful and determined not to be bullied by Diesel. Only James, who now felt really useful too, was complaining.

James: Wobbly wheels!

Thomas: [cheekily] Puffy pistons!

James: [furious] Thomas, I should have collected Mr. Conductor!

Gordon: [also furious] James is right, little Thomas! [chuckles] Collecting Mr. Conductor is an important job! Hmm? Important is big! James is a big engine, hmm?

James: Hmm!

Gordon You Thomas, are small! Small-Small-Small, Teeny-Weeny-Weeny! And I, I'm a big blue engine, who knows everything! [chuckles]

Edward: Shut up, you're all jealous!

Eagle: Yeah, at least Thomas has done a good job with his work!

Thomas: [rudely] Bossy Sprockets! All that steam has gone through your funnel!

Edward: Cheer up, Thomas.

[Splatter and Dodge arrive and reverse into the good sheds.]

Splatter: Hey, there they are.

Dodge: We'll fix their wagons.

Splatter: I'm not good at backing up.

Dodge: Me, neither.

[The steam engines take no notice of Splatter and Dodge, as they're busy talking about Diesel 10.]

Toby: What's important is to stand up on our own wheels to Diesel!

Henry: [irritated] Toby's right! Diesel knows that the lost engine in the legend really exists.

James: What engine?!

Percy: What legend?

Edward: Of an engine whose magic makes her more powerful than Diesel will ever be. 

Eagle: That's why he wants to find her.

Percy: Then we'd better find her first!

James: [comes out of the shed] Leave it to the big engines, Percy!

Thomas: Little Engines can do big things, especially when they have nice blue paint like me!

Splatter: [to Dodge about Thomas] Hey, Hey! Just watch what happens with that blue puffball...

Dodge: ...When Harold the Flopper-Chopper flies past here.

Splatter: [laughs] Right!

[Harold flies by.]

Harold: Routine flyby, chaps. Hello!

Splatter: The boss dumped sneezing powder everywhere.

Dodge: Let's start laughing now!

Splatter: [laughing] Yeah!

[The wind from Harold's propellers causes the sneezing powder to fly all over Thomas, Splatter and Dodge.]

Harold: Sorry, troops. A bit of a dust up. Love to stay and clean up. Got to go, bye now!

Splatter: Uh, did you mean to look like that?!

Dodge: Uh, no!

Splatter: Uh, neither did I.

Thomas: This must be Diesel's doing! Ah-choo-choo!

[Meanwhile Mr. Conductor is in Sir Topham Hatt's office reading a letter addressed to him.]

Mr. Conductor: "Dear Mr. Conductor. Where were you? My wife said she couldn't miss our little holiday. We'll telephone to make sure you have arrived." Signed, "Sir Topham Hatt." Sir Topham Hatt.

[Mr. Conductor spots a top hat left on a coat stand. He puts it on and looks in a mirror.]

Mr. Conductor: [Impersonating Sir Topham Hatt] Where were you?

[Mr. Conductor grins, until he notices the poster of Sir Topham Hatt on the wall changes expression from happy to angry. Mr. Conductor quickly puts the top hat back on the coat stand, then the telephone rings. Mr . Conductor falls to the floor while grabbing the phone, knocking over a picture of Lady Hatt in the process. Luckily he grabs the picture before it his the ground. Sir Topham Hatt is on the other end of the phone.]

Mr. Conductor: Oh, good afternoon, Sir. A real honor, Sir. Like my family before me. And how is Lady Hat? Yes? Watch out for Diesel. Definitely. Keep an eye on Henry's health. Certainly. Yes, Sir, the 3 R's, reading, writing and arithmetic. I mean... I will be responsible, reliable... and really useful. Yes, Sir. We will all get a good night's sleep. Looking forward to a hard day tomorrow. Goodbye, Sir.