Chasing Ellie

35. The White Pages

Ellie Hope

"So this is my room." I tell Darren, pushing open the door.

When he pulled into my driveway, naturally I told him to come in. If Brett we're here he would have scolded me because I didn't ask Darren. I once again, told him.

He didn't seem to mind.

"Colorful." He says.

I laugh, "it's a mess, I know."

I can only assume Darren's room is pristine and orderly.  He's probably the type of person that has only what he needs rather than all the clutter of sentimental things I like to keep. But it's hard for me to toss aside the things that are attached to memories. Like the numerous doodles Savannah has given me over the years, or a book of unsolved mysteries that Brett found somewhere and gave me. Or the time I got Wes to go to the movies with me. That was no small feat and I have triumphantly held onto the ticket stubs since.

It all looks like useless stuff. Junk. But my room is my heart on display.

"I like it." He tells me.

He stands awkwardly in my open doorway, almost as if he's never been into some one else's room let alone a girls. It makes me feel better about my sudden realization about how my room may be perceived by others. At least we're both knocked off guard.

It doesn't seem as though he's going to move from where he's at, so I pat my bed not far from where I've already plopped myself down.

"Make yourself at home." Not that I think he'll do anything of the such. "We can watch a show or figure out the latest gossip on the rumor mill or you can help me devise my plan to get out of this town, the possibilities are endless."

I'm mostly teasing.

"You want don't want to stay here?" He asks with more interest and clarity than I think I've seen from him yet.

I shake my head, "nope, I want to travel as soon as I graduate."

Even before college, I want to get out and see the world. It's slightly problematic because I don't have a car but I figure maybe I can jump from city to city by bus or train.

"Me too." It's a whisper as he shuffles a little farther into my room. "I have it mapped, the places I want to go."

So James wasn't lying.

"Top three places."

"West coast, probably LA but also Seattle and then I want to spend some time in the mountains." He's confident in his answers, bold, like he's thought this throw millions of times. "But end goal is traveling abroad."

I let myself fall back onto my bed over dramatic as I say "finally someone with some sense in this god forsaken place."

Sneaking a peek at Darren, I catch a smile as his gaze falls to stare at his feet.

"I want to travel abroad too. But before that I..." I have not mentioned my search for my biological parents ever since that night on Facebook and neither has Darren. Its silly, to hope to find them. My adoption is closed for a reason I know that. And I know it's even sillier to think I'll get to meet them but that doesn't lessen my hope or my desire for it to happen. "If I can find my biological parents, I want to visit them."

Darren stuffs his hands in the pocket of the hoodie he has on, taking tentative steps toward my bed before he looks at me one more time before taking a seat on the very edge. Literally as far away from me as he could be. It amuses me.

"My offer still stands." He says. "If you want help."

I study his back, the way the gray material of his hoodie stretches around his shoulders, the hair line precisely cut at the back of his neck, the angle at which his neck is bent allowing his head to hang. Making him command less presence than I think he should. His light hair, styled neatly so that every individual strand lays perfectly a top of his head.

"Yeah?"

He glances over his shoulder, his profile quite striking with his pale features and dark eyes. A faint spray of freckles dotting his skin. He's still boyish looking, his face not yet chiseled and defined with age but it's easy to see that Darren is the type of boy who will only manage to get better looking as he ages.

"Yeah, of course."

A smile pulls at the corner of my lips, my heart beating a little erratically in my chest. I sink my teeth into my lip to prevent a massive grin taking over my face, I don't want to look like an extreme lunatic. And then I pluck my laptop off my nightstand and open it up.

"Okay so here's what I know." Once again, patting my bed, beckoning Darren to sit beside me at the head rather the foot where he's perched. "Come on." I coax when he doesn't move.

His cheeks flush but he repositions himself so that we are side by side on my bed. His legs stretch for miles past mine and even though we're both sitting, when I turn to look at him I still have to look up.

I hate being short.

"Anyway, this is the Diana Fowler I've been looking into." I pull up her Facebook and hand my computer off to Darren.

He doesn't bother looking at her Facebook page, rather opening up another tab and typing her name directly into google. The white pages pop up with multiple hits.

"Why didn't I think of that?" I ask my room, leaning closer to him as if it'll get me a better view.

"I think we should cross reference. These will give us names and approximate ages and residences. Plus relatives. We can search for some of the relatives on social media, maybe it'll help narrow down which Diana Fowler it could be." He swallows hard. "Maybe one of them will have an AJ they're connected to."

I don't want to let myself get too excited but it's a struggle, one I'm apparently losing as I look at Darren and say "you are absolutely brilliant".