bloom. : a fireafy fic

Chapter One

Leafy chewed her bagel slowly. Mornings had come to be so unfulfilling and dreadful. The crisp early air, which she had grown up loving so much, had now become something she felt she did not deserve to experience. Her thoughts, which had mostly been sunshine and rainbows, had mostly become bleak and gloomy.

The smell of coffee, which she normally took pleasure in, began to grow stale. She peered into her cup and shook it a little. The coolness of the mug confirmed her suspicions; while she had been lost in thought, her coffee had grown cold. She didn't want it anymore.

She wasn't entirely sure why she was like this. The feelings of depression, anxiety, and paranoia heightened when she and Firey had split. After she and him decided to get back together as an official couple, she had expected the feelings to go away.

They did not.

"He doesn't love me," replaced itself with "He's going to stop loving me again."

"He doesn't care," replaced itself with "What if he doesn't care?"

"I don't matter" replaced itself with "Nothing matters."

In the past, she had loved Firey fiercely, only, completely. Despite that, he left her. Now, she felt as if their love was insecure.

Smokey, her cat, passed his head against her neck. She hadn't even realized he jumped onto the counter. What he needed quickly dawned on her.

"Oh Smokey!" she exclaimed apologetically. "I'm so sorry! You must be starving!"

The greenhaired girl rushed to the cabinet, mentally scolding herself for being so forgetful and stupid. Her kitten had grown exponentially, he was constantly ravenous and getting into trouble. A little teenager. She grinned softly and poured some food into his bowl.

Immediately, Smokey pounced on the food dish. Leafy giggled and ran her fingers through his soft fur. He practically inhaled his food.

"Slow down!" Leafy gasped. Smokey flicked his tail twice and licked his dish. "Don't you know how to savor your food? You don't even know what it tastes like if you keep scarfing it down like that!"

Smokey purred and ran himself along her calves. Leafy shook her head in mock exasperation. She stood up, stretched, and gathered her dishes, pouring the cold coffee down the sink and dumping her half-eaten bagel into the compost bin.

She spent the rest of the morning playing with her cat and chatting about how stunning he was. The orange tabby cat basked in the attention, meowing in happiness.

"You spoiled kitty," the girl chuckled. "Unfortunately, I'll have to head to work soon. I wonder what I'll wear today?"

The library had pushed her shift back. When she usually worked morning to mid-afternoon, she had been moved from noon to dusk. This change was not well received with her; she loved morning walks to work, and now she had no reason to get out of bed in the morning. She also quickly began to miss her morning coffee shop talks with Bubble.

Firey brewed coffee every morning, and it wasn't the same.

Plastic packaged, lifeless coffee. Brewed, by Firey, from an old, second hand coffee machine. Poured into a bland, gray ceramic mug.

No talking. He usually just shoved the mug in her hands. He didn't talk much to her in general.

Leafy shuffled over to her closet, frowning. Was she so demanding as to require he talk about his day to her? She felt as if simply thinking that he didn't talk to her enough was already asking for too much.

She huffed, attempting to clear her thoughts. Her viridescent eyes traced the sleeves of the articles of clothing which hung in her wardrobe, but she had no motivation to pick out something decent. She opted for comfort or style; some black leggings and a mint green crewneck sweater.

She threw the garments onto the bed and blinked at them. She vaguely remembered that she forgot to make the bed. Oh well. It's just going to get messed up again when they sleep tonight, why should she bother?

The clothing screamed back at her, boring into her soul. Leafy felt as if they were telling her it was obvious she wasn't fucking trying. She huffed again, this time incredulously. It doesn't matter what she wore, she looked the same to everyone. It wasn't as if nobody would notice her.

After haphazardly pulling on her clothes and boots, she said her goodbyes to Smokey and walked out the door and down the stairs of her building. Just walking already felt exhausting. She missed her cat.

When she stepped outside, she looked at the springtime sky with disdain. The sun demanded her attention, bathing her skin with its incessant heat and light. While there were clouds, they were bright white and cheery, and outlined against the cerulean sky, they looked sickeningly beautiful.

She wished for rain.