Why, What, Why?

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Fitz sat down on the floor of his room. He was numb for the moment. He was unsure of even opening the Jemma's letter. His curiosity got the better of him though. 

1. Why don't you do anything, let alone, talk with me anymore?

2. Why do I make you worse?

3. What can I do to help you?

4. Why would you make me leave you in the pod?

5. Do you love me anymore?

Fitz laughed as he started reading the first couple of questions. Skye really must have been right about that whole "You and Simmons are so tight, it's like your psychically linked" crap! He wasn't in the mood either to answer her questions. So like Simmons, he started wandering the halls. Even if he couldn't see her, he could hear her light footsteps coming down the hall. Being around someone for over 10 years make you super sensitive to their sounds, quirks and movements. Quickly searching for somewhere to hide, he locked himself in a supply closet. He opened the door after he heard her go by and opened just in time to see her walk around the corner. He closed the door and slid down it exhaling loudly. He flipped on the light to find a notebook tucked away on one of the shelf. He was surprised at what the front cover said.

Jemma's Journal. If found, please do not open and give to either Skye or I.

He didn't know if he should read it. That would totally cross the line and he didn't need her getting mad at him. But again, curiosity got the better of him. After plopping himself back on the floor, he opened it. 

On the back on the front page was a copy of the selfie he and Jemma took in Peru. 

On the first page was a recount of the 9 days Fitz was in a come. 

Day 1: I miss him so much. I can't live without him. Fitz please wake up! I can't eat or sleep and I just want to talk to you and see your blue eyes again. Please wake up. I never got to tell him I love him back in the pod. He pushed the button before I could speak. 

He sat there in shock. After a few moments, he read on.

The next few days were hard for him to read. Skye had been crushing up sleeping pills and putting them into Jemma's food so she would sleep. She would lay on the bed with him and rest her head on his chest and hold his hand when she slept. She even went on to say she kissed him once on his lips on the 8th day. There was no one in the Medical Wing and she wanted to see if he would react. His pulse and brain activity went up. 

Fitz had no memory of that. It absolutely broke his heart.

The next few pages were some of her favorite memories from Sci-Ops, The Academy, and on the Bus. Then she started updating it weekly a few weeks after he woke up. He started tearing up while reading those. 

In a summary, the updates said that she didn't think that Fitz loved her anymore. In it was her explanation to why she went to Hydra. She was scared and confused. Skye had been helping her through it, but she was lonely. She thought he hated her. But it was the exact opposite. She really was ruling for him. She wanted him to get better, to recover. After reading all this, he felt like a complete arsehole. He wanted to march into her room and kiss her till her knees were weak, but he wanted to read her answers. Reading this cleared his mind about the whole situation. 

He flipped to the next few pages. These were recent. So recent that Jemma had written in it this yesterday. 

Reasons I love Leo Fitz:

1. His laugh

2. His smile

3. His hands

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