Chase Your Stars

When Things Fell Apart

A/N: Trigger Warning; This chapter contains suicide attempts, depression and self harm.

Narrators POV (in 1996)

It was late afternoon and 4 year old Sasha and her 2 year old brother Josh had just returned home from daycare. Sasha raced into the house excited to show her mom what she made while in daycare, but once she made it into the house her facial expressions went from extremely happy to pure terror. "Mommy!" Sasha yelled out repeatedly as she saw her mother laying on the floor unconscious with a half empty pill bottle beside from her. "Daddy! Mommy won't wake up!" young Sasha exclaimed as her father rushed over to his wife. He knelt down to the floor to check his wife's breathing and pulse, she was hardly breathing and her pulse was weak, but there although he could feel it dropping as the minutes passed. "Sasha sweetie call 911 and them we need help!" He said to his daughter who did as she was told to as he began CPR.

A few minutes after the call was made flashing lights of an ambulance surrounded the home of The Banks family. Paramedics entered the home to assist Judith (Sasha's mother), they continued CPR and asked Sasha's father questions. "Do you know what happened?" a paramedic asked and her father shook his head. "I'm thinking it was a suicide attempt due to our daughter finding her unresponsive on the floor with pills beside her." He stated as another paramedic came in with a stretcher to put Judith on and roll her out to the ambulance. The one paramedic continued CPR on the way to the ambulance while the other placed her inside and hooked her up to the oxygen. Thomas (Sasha's father) followed the paramedics outside as his two children followed behind him. "Momma." Joshua said blankly as he pointed to the ambulance that took off. Thomas put his kids into the car and got in himself as he followed after the ambulance not wanting to be away from his wife at this time.

The ambulance made it to the hospital and so did Thomas. Judith was rushed inside to an empty trauma room, doctors and nurses began to hook her to a couple other machines. "She attempted suicide by overdosing so we have to preform a Gastric Irrigation to get the rest of those pills out her system before we loose her completely." A doctor said as they stuck a tube down Judith's throat to remove the left over pills she used to overdosed with. Judith's husband watched most of the procedure in fear of not knowing if he were to ever see his wife alive again. "C'mon Judy, you have to pull through for us." He thought to himself.

After almost an hour later Judith had been placed in the ICU (Intensive Care Unit), she wasn't awake but she was alive which Thomas had been very grateful for. "You can go in and see her if you'd like sir, you don't have to bring your children either they can we brought up to the daycare. I'd gladly bring them up if you'd like me too." A medical resident said to him and he nodded. "Sasha and Joshua you guys are going to up to the hospital's daycare with this nice doctor." Thomas said to his kids. "I want to go see mommy!" Sasha exclaimed and her dad shook his head. "No sweetie you can't, not now baby." He said and his daughter sighed in defeat as she began the walk with her brother and the resident to the elevator. Thomas entered the room and sat beside Judith and held her hand. "Whatever the problem is honey we'll get through it together as a family. There's always light in the darkness let us be your light honey." He said

Fast Forward to when Sasha was 14

A lot had happen in the past 10 years. Sasha's dad passed away when she was only 9, and her younger brother got really sick and their mother couldn't provide him with the care he needed so he ended up moving to another family members' home. Its been Sasha and her mother for the past 5 years and within that time period Sasha's fell in love with wrestling but her mother struggled with her depression. Sasha was home schooled for the most part to keep an eye out for her mother just to make sure she didn't attempt to take her life again. This year Sasha decided to attend an actual high school and her mother agreed just to make her daughter happy, although she was a parent struggling with depression on her best days she tried her best to make Sasha happy like how she was when her father and younger brother were still around. Today was Sasha's first day attending an actual high school, she got ready and ate then left out for school. During Sasha's time at school Judith had been pacing back and forth in the kitchen overthinking and saying how Sasha shouldn't be dealing with all of this at her age when she should live a normal life as a teenager and that it should've been her instead of Thomas. "I'm the problem. I'm the reason my husband is dead, my son not being here and my daughter living a miserable life." Judith heavily thought to herself. At the school Sasha currently attends ends at 3:30 pm but today it ended at 1:30. The time was currently 1:00 pm. "If time could only speed up so I could tell mom about my day and call Josh to tell him as well." Sasha then thought to herself, little did she know that the day will turn out to be the worst day in her life again. 30 minutes went by and Sasha had been released from school and she made her way home. Meanwhile, her mother had locked herself in the bathroom and ran the water in the bathtub unaware the bathtubs' drain was plugged. Sasha's mother gave herself a good look before looking down at her wrist and over at the switchblade on the counter.

Sasha made it back home from school and called out for her mom and got no response, Sasha did hear the water running up in the bathroom. As she got closer to the top of the staircase some steps had a small puddle of water on them. "No! This can't be happening!" Sasha said to herself as she ran over to the bathroom door and twisted the knob realizing it was locked. "Fuck. Fuck! FUCK! THINK SASHA THINK!" She shouted as she got an idea to bust the door down, she took a few steps back and ran towards the door to force it to open, it took her 2-3 tries to get the door open. "HOLY SHIT MOM!" Sasha said out loud as she saw her mom on the bathroom floor laying in a pool of her own blood and water. She had slit both her wrist and possibly fainted and hit her head pretty hard since it was bleeding their too. Sasha turned the water off and she checked her mother's pulse, sadly there wasn't a strong one. Sasha called the 911 in hopes of some sort of miracle to happen, she found some wash clothes and tied them around her mom's wrist to temporarily stop her bleeding and dragged her body downstairs. "It's alright mom, I've got you now." Sasha said as she made it down the flight of steps with her mother now holding her mother tightly and rocking back and forth waiting for the to ambulance, Sasha got flashbacks to when she was 4 and found her mom, it felt extremely crazy just for it to happen again 10 years later. The ambulance arrived and did the same as before but this time Sasha was riding with her, they made it to the hospital and it all felt the same when Sasha was younger, they rushed Judith into a trauma room once more hooking her up to machines but this time Judith need a blood transfusion due to her loosing a lot of blood and Sasha demanded they draw her blood to give to her mother, which they couldn't due to it not being tested and Judith's life being on the line for the second time, they did get donor blood which help Judith for the most part. They intubated Judith and as Sasha's late father watched her as the procedure happen 10 years ago, Sasha did the same.

Sasha was allowed to see her mother later on that day. Her mom had stitches where she had slit her wrist and had staples on the side of her head that she busted open. "Sasha, I'm sorry that I'm such a fuck up of a mother, you don't deserve me as a parent." Judith said ashamed of herself. "Mom, everyone goes through things in life. I wouldn't have asked for a better mother regardless of your imperfections, but I don't want you in and out the hospital like this mom, you have to get help. If not for you then for me and Josh." Sasha said and her mother nodded in agreement. Sasha sat at her mothers bedside and they both discussed way of coping and getting all of this.

Sorry for the long chapter. This is probably the only chapter that made me sad while writing and proof reading. I'm sure there may be some misspelling and missing words due to me crying while writing.

Suicide is NEVER the answer to TEMPORARY a problem, talk to a love one, friend of partner in a relationship, my messages are also open to those in need as well, I love you all.