Meridia Marquis was everything she was told she needed to be. She was going to be the first female alpha of her father's rising pack, Lucid Moon. She wanted to escape from the place she hated the most. The last thought on her mind every night was ho...
Tell me how you hate me Lies, tell me lies, tell me how you hate me Tell me how you hate me Lies, tell me lies, baby, tell me how you hate me
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Estavan Maylor
She doesn't want me.
"She doesn't want me," the words were so bitter on my tongue. Over and over I repeated those four words. I scoffed every time the reminder came that I thought- very hopefully- that my mate would want me. Save me. I don't know, I just wanted out. So I depended on the one thing...foolish of me, right?
I've always known I was born on the same day as the Alpha's daughter, two years later though. Who would've thought that the night of my sixteenth birthday she was the one that would've shoved me into a painful darkness without mercy?
Now everything is crashing down because she proved it. The one angel I craved for...she proved that I can never be saved. Cruel is life so I must suffer. How much pain do I have to endure for the moon goddess to decide I've had enough? Even when it's my mate, the one person that was supposed to ensure happiness.
She gives me pain instead.
"She...doesn't want me," I repeated. The heat caged inside my body rose again and my shivering hands grabbed the thin sheet covering my naked body. I feel it approaching slowly and there's nothing I can do to prepare myself for the pain. "She doesn't-" I started without a finish because I feel the glass sticking into my spine.
"S-She-" my words were transformed into screams when the volcano in my chest erupted again sending flames of fire and boulders of glass throughout my body. It felt like every bone in my body was splintered with glass shards, nails being hammered into my brain. The fire slipped into every part of me...it was pain like no other. Worst part, it only worsened to the point where my eyelids felt heavy but wouldn't dare shut, eyes blurred and vision white. The fire wouldn't put out until I'm seconds away from passing out. The fire wants to explore but my body kept it confined.
I'm so used to pain, my tolerance for it is high and that wasn't in my control. There's hasn't been a day that passed that I'm not kicked or punched. Words hurt also, whoever said they don't is living on lies. I scream into the sheet, it doesn't really muffle it when another wave hits me right after and by now it feels like my body is the center of hell.
Even the tears that have been endless for the past three hours felt hot against my cold skin. Eventually, it all becomes too much and the white turns to black when my eyelids won. "Go to sleep, my sweet boy," my mother cooed. She wasn't actually there but I imagined her to be.
I'm all alone.
_♤_
Dusting off the dirt from my uniform, Reeta approaches me with urgency. "Ethan I need you to wash dishes today. The family is deciding to have breakfast with the pack today and we're busy adjusting the menu," Reeta rambled off. She rambles when she's tired which is the only time I actually get information.
I know I should be used to it by now but I flipping hate when they call me Ethan. What's so difficult about my name, Estavan? My mother loved it so I consider it rude when they forget it. Trust me, I know they're doing it purposefully.
"Okay, Reeta," I agreed anyway and nod my head as a goodbye before storming into the kitchen. A few glanced at me and their faces scrunched up, others were too busy to give me their attention. Without words spoken, I started scrubbing the dishes while people finished with dessert and others put the food onto plates and whatever.
When I finished, Reeta marched into the kitchen with perfect timing. Her eyes landed on me, her target. "Help me distribute the plates, you better not drop them," Reeta harshly demanded and I'm forced to agree. Then her previous words sank in, the family- the alpha's family- is having breakfast here. So that only means that I'm going to see...her.
I can't do this.
MeridiaMarquis
"Good morning, Reeta," I fake smiled. Usually, I didn't have to fake a smile around Reeta. She's an absolute angel and I've never seen her act without kindness. She's probably the backbone of everything that happens at the packhouse. However, I've had a painful night, to say the least. Today my father was very pleased to see that I had on makeup. He always suggested it with good intentions. "Good morning, Darling. It's amazing to see you after your birthday two days ago," she admits.
It's too early in the morning to say it was two days ago. Still feels like yesterday but I don't disagree with her. "It's not like we had a choice," Mal mumbled beside me and I shoved my elbow into his side. He groans and glares at me, I could feel it. "It was long overdue," I covered ourselves. Reeta laughs and says her temporary goodbyes before she quickly returns to the kitchen.
"Meridia, sit up straight," my father scolded from where he sat opposite us. My posture straightened immediately and I placed my hand on my thighs as he practiced us to do. "Sorry, father. Habit," I apologized. "I always say you should stop sitting on that sofa. They're the cause for spine-" dad continues with disappointment.
"Dad we had this conversation already, stop," Mal sighed. Father is always trying to teach us some lesson until I had an episode because of it and Malice made him realize his constant mistakes. His now softer eyes landed on me," sorry," he apologized, and with perfect timing, they bring out the food.
When his scent hits my nose, my head whipped in his direction and they landed on him instantly. I silently gasped and dragged my eyes down his body, taking in his adorable he looked in his uniform. It looked huge on him though so the muscles on his arms and detailed upper chest I saw yesterday were hidden to my disparity.
He's avoiding looking at me, his concentration on the plate he held. "Why'd you look like you've been sleep deprived for a century this morning?" Mal changed the topic. I snapped my head away to prevent accusations of staring at the waiter.
Oh nothing brother, I just went through the most painful experience all by myself. Last night I was scared that the night guards would catch me sneaking out if I went to Maylor. They're doubled at night for protection and it has never been a problem for me until now. He must hate me but I rather not be tortured by silver for trying to sneak out. That's a broken rule father doesn't tolerate.
"I was in the darkroom in the basement...checking out old stuff," I shrugged. It wasn't a lie at all but my intention was to be hidden from everyone. I told father beforehand, of course. Once I didn't step out of our sector. A couple of years ago, I was into photography and dad took me seriously with it because we made a deal. He allowed me to experiment seriously with a camera and I start training.
He had to be the person delivering my breakfast specially. When our hands brushed, Tave howled in pain and I actually had to shut my eyes for a second so she wouldn't gain any sort of control. "You okay, Dia?" Malice questions and I slowly parted my eyelids. With a fake smile on my face again, I replied.
