Church, Caboose, and Tucker stood before Church and Tex's grave. The ghost was currently possessing Lopez's body, which was currently still brown in color.
Church(Past): Um. . . maybe somebody should say something.
Tucker(Past): Okay, go ahead.
Church(Past): Not me, jackass. I'm not gonna eulogize myself.
Tucker(Past): Why? Why not, I eulogize myself all the time. Wait. . . I think I don't know what the word eulogize means.
Caboose(Past): Wait. I know how to do this. Dearly Beloved-
Church(Past): No, shut him up. Seriously, shut him up.
Caboose(Past): We are gathered here today, to witness, the joining together of Tex and Church, in eternalness together, smuh- speak now! Or forever, Rest In Peace! With liberty and justice for all. The end.
Tucker(Past): Man, this is funeral is laaaaame. If you need me I'll be over by my rock.
Church(Past): Hey Tucker, can I have a piggyback ride back to base?
Tucker(Past): No, nonono, I fell for that shit last time. I'm not doing that. That metal suit is like eight thousand pounds.
Church(Past): Come on, one more piggyback ride's not gonna kill ya. I'm in mourning here. I've been through so much, at least help me pain my body blue.
Present Chuch watched them from afar.
Church: Okay, I may not have been able to save myself or Tex, but I still have time to save everybody else if I can just keep the A.I. from getting into Doc. Prevent Lopez and Sheila from making their robot army, and somehow find a way to stop the war between the Reds and Blues all together. What if I. . . Yeah I'm gonna need some help on this one.
Past Church and Tucker were outside the base, the ghosts body now painted cobalt. The two were now trying to find Lopez's repair systems. The present Church slipped into the base and began searching.
Church: Where the hell is that contact info for Blue command? We really need to standardize the way we handle our information.
He eventually found "Cabose's Importent Lists of Stuf: 1. Tucker is stupid. 2. Sandwitches! 3. Comand Hotline: ZAQR49M-2. S. Mommy. P.S. Awesomness! 7. Dancing Time."
Church: Come in Blue command, do you read me?
Vic(Past): Hello, hello, come in. Do you read me? Do I read you? Hello, can you read me, what's goin' on, it's a secure channel here, come on.
Church: Uh yeah, this is, uh, Flowers, this is Captain Butch Flowers.
Vic(Past): Heyyy, Captain Flowers, how're you doing dude? Hey, I thought you died. Or you got promoted, wait a minute. Which one was it?
Church: Umm, promoted.
Vic(Past): Alright, great dude. How's that workin' out for you?
Church: Good, listen up Vic. I'm actually uh, whaddaya call it, um intelligence now, military intelligence, yeah. And I uh, I need help on a very top secret project, uh, that's very secret. And very top.
Vic(Past): I'm all yours, dude. Me Vic dude es tu Vic dude, in a ditideepti and all that.
Church: Here's what I need you to do. I need you to contact the Red Army, and have them send Medical Officer DuFresne, as far away from here as possible.
Vic(Past): Red Army, no no dude. Last transmission I received, that medic was at Blue Base. Got it right here in my log. No pun intended, not sure what it means.
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Red Vs Blue, & there's Magenta: Season Three
FanfictionRed Vs Blue, but with a twist! The Reds and Blues were in hot pursuit with O'Malley! However, they didn't expect to end up with a talking bomb. They definitely didn't expect to find two laser words. And they most definitely didn't expect to be sent...
