Tucker: You're trying to tell us that the bomb can talk.
Church was with the rest of the group and was informing them of his conversation with Gary.
Caboose: I'm not telling you that, he's telling you that.
Andy: Yeah, and I'm standing right here, you can talk to me.
The bomb could indeed talk.
Tucker: If you could talk this whole time, then why didn't you j- Wait, why am I talking to a bomb? I'm not doing this.
Andy: What? Am I not good enough to talk to? Who do you think you are? Some kind of too-good-to-talk-to-a-bomb type.
Church: Maybe it's a good idea to not piss off the explosive device.
Ruby: Yeah.
Tex: I agree.
Church: I wasn't talking about you Tex.
Tex: Hey! Why don't you suck my-
Tucker: Did Gary say anything about the bomb being able to talk?
Church: Uh, just this whole place is going to be destroyed by us and that Andy here is probably the thing that does it.
Tucker: Oh. . . that's not good.
Andy: I don't think so. Bunch of Shisnos if ya ask me. And no one did ask me, which I find insulting!
Ruby: What's a Shisno?
Andy: It's what you all are, Shisnos.
Church: Alright, alright calm down Andy, calm down.
Andy: Don't tell me to calm down. I am calm!
Church: Caboose, calm this thing down before it has a meltdown.
Andy: Look at me! I am calm!
Caboose: Andy. . . Everyone here is your friend. And no one wants to hurt you.
Andy: Yeah right.
Caboose: Come on Andy, think of a happy place! Now, what makes you happy?
Andy: Being in the middle of a huge explosion!
Ruby: Him and I are not going to get along.
Church: Less happy places Caboose. Less happy place.
Caboose: Ahh uhh, think calming thoughts. Uhh, let's count backwards from ten! TEN! NINE! EIGHT!
Ruby/Tex/Tucker: NO!
Church: DUCK!
*With the Reds*
Simmons: I'm 95% certain the distress signal is coming from that way.
Sarge: Excellent work Simmons. Alright men. . . and Grif, let's get ready to roll!
Grif: Only 95% certain?
Simmons: Grif, if there's one thing that I've learned from working with you, it's that there's always margin for error.
Sarge: Excellent comeback Simmons. That's a burn.
Simmons: Thank you sir.
Grif: Har Har, look who's so smart. It's pronounced margarine dumbass.
Simmons: Seriously, if I ever find the guy that assigned you to our squad, I'm gonna kill him.
Grif: Well, if you're 95% certain it's that way, which way is the other five percent?
Simmons: What do you think? All the other directions.
YOU ARE READING
Red Vs Blue, & there's Magenta: Season Three
FanfictionRed Vs Blue, but with a twist! The Reds and Blues were in hot pursuit with O'Malley! However, they didn't expect to end up with a talking bomb. They definitely didn't expect to find two laser words. And they most definitely didn't expect to be sent...
