Jealous? - Eight

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Dot helped me wrap my ankle and gave me some painkillers. I tried to get up but I failed and fell back down. "here let me help you," Shelby said offering me her hand.

I took her and she pulled me up. "Thanks," I said smiling at her. Shelby was actually a good person and I shouldn't rule her out just because she normally wouldn't be the type of person that I would hang out with.

"How about we play a game" Shelby proposed. "here we go again" Rachel mumbled to herself. "I think it's a good idea" I chimed in.

"No one asked" Said Toni. I flicked her off and said, "fuck off Toni".

"What about never have I ever," Martha asked. The rest of the group agreed with Martha's suggestion.

"Who wants to go first," asked Shelby. I took a seat next to Shelby.

"I'll go first" Fatin announced. It would be so shocking to find out that she hasn't done something.

"Never have I ever smoked weed," Said Fatin. That was very shocking, she didn't look like the stoner type, but she looked like the type to smoke a little at parties.

Toni, Dot, Nora and I put a finger down.

"Nora?" Fatin exclaimed, "who would have thought" Dot added.

"Never have I ever had sex," Shelby said. Fatin, Leah, Nora, Toni, and I put a finger down.

"Damn I thought I was the only one," Martha said, "It takes courage to save yourself," Shelby said throwing her arm around Martha.

Toni rolled her eyes at the comment, I did the same.

We did a few more dumb questions and Shelby and I just hung out near the water.

"So what was it like your first time," Shelby asked curiously. That questions brought back so many memories I forgot I had.

"It was scary at first because I had no idea what I was doing but the person I was with at the time really guided me through it" I smiled at that thought.

"Spill who was he," asked Shelby. I was surprised how much she wanted to know because she's all about saving herself.

"Toni," I said looking away from her. I looked back at Shelby, her emotions started to change and she looked uncomfortable.

"Well I'm gonna help Leah with something," Shelby said getting up. I nodded in acknowledgment.

I spent the rest of the day by myself chilling by the water. I didn't really feel like talking to anyone today.

It was getting dark and I had no motivation to get up and go back to the group. I felt someone tap my shoulder.

I turned around and saw Shelby. The rest of the girls were at camp around the fire out of sight.

"Listen, Melody, I didn't mean to come off weird before," Shelby said softly. "Well you kind of did but it's chill don't worry about it" I replied.

"I just-" "You don't have to explain yourself" I cut her off. I really didn't care and Shelby's opinion on me being gay was the least of my concerns.

I turned towards Shelby and met her already looking at me. I didn't really see her in that way but right now I was feeling a little different maybe it was the meds.

I tucked my hair behind my ear, took off guard Shelby grabbed my face and kissed me. I kissed her back and my hands on her waist.

I pulled away. What the actual fuck just happened. I was confused on why she did that considering her values, and Shelby looked lost too.

Shelby got up quickly for the second time today and ran back in the direction of the camp.

I was at a loss for words. I mean internalized homophobia was a thing but Shelby's was rooted deep. I honestly felt bad for her.

I have no idea how I feel about her right now.

I tightly wrapped my sweater around me feeling comforted. Yes, I wanted help to come but If we had water and food for a lifetime and I had an option to stay I don't know if I would go.

I closed my eyes and laid down on the damp sand. I took in a deep breath of cool air and for a split second, I forgot I was on this damn island.

I fell asleep easily.

I woke up to a shadow towering over me. I rubbed my eyes still not being able to make out who it was because everything was still blurry.

" I see you and Shelby have gotten quite close" Toni stated. "Wow you have eyes" I replied.

"You think you're hilarious don't you," Toni said rhetorically. " You used to think so," I said back to Toni.

" I don't know why you're so close to a literal homophobe," said Toni. Ya...."homophobe". I wasn't going to out Shelby, I know how that feels.

"Can you give me a minute to fucking wake up?" I said yawning. "Why do you even care" I added. "I don't" Toni replied. "jealous?" I said teasing her.

"No," Toni said aggressively while stomping away.

I smiled to myself knowing the fact that I got to her.

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