𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐐𝐮𝐞𝐞𝐧'𝐬 𝐆𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐢𝐭 ♕From Beth the Eyes of Beth Harmon

I-Just a Pawn

Episode 1

Openings

Part 1

Kentucky, 1957

Just a Pawn

My mom didn't want me.

I wasn't sure of it then, but I know that's what happened now.

That's why I ended up here.

At Methuen Home for Christian Girls.

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The black car pulled up to an old mansion-y looking brick building, and the lady standing outside the front steps to greet me was wearing pearls around her neck and an olive green dress. I got out of the back seat, and the sweet lady driving me told me good luck as I left the car. On the drive there, she told me that my mother had passed on, and she was now in a better place. She said that someday I would be able to see her again.

The lady in the green dress walked me through the big main hall of the building. It scared me. I didn't know what I did that caused me to end up here, and I didn't know where I was or who I was with. As we walked, she showed me some of the different rooms, like where we ate and where we had our classes. She showed me the chapel and the lady who ran it.

The lady held my hand as we walked. When she introduced me to Mr. Fergusson, I heard a girl yelling. She said words that I didn't know. I don't think she should've said them. I learned that the lady in the green dress whose hand I was holding was called Mrs. Deardorff.

Mrs. Deardorff then showed me a room full of beds. They were all neatly lined up against the walls. She walked me over to one right next to the bathroom, and told me that it would be my special place. She showed me where to put my clothes, toothbrush, and personal items. Then she sat me down on the bed and told me some things I didn't understand at the time. She said that she knew I was feeling lost, but here at this new place, I would find a better life for myself through prayer and faith. With a smile on her face, she said that we would become friends.

She called me Elizabeth, which I didn't like because my name is Beth.

After that, Mrs. Deardorff took me to a bathroom where the chapel lady cut off almost all of my hair. I watched as the wisps of red floated down to the floor, and little by little, more hair was on the ground than on my head.

The dress I was wearing was embroidered with my name. Mrs. Deardorff told me to take it off and gave me a new one that was too big for me. She said that she would burn my dress, which was the only thing left of me at that point. I didn't have anything left from my mom after that.

"One last stop."

She took me to the room where all the girls eat. They were waiting in a line that led to Mr. Ferguson handing us a cup. We were supposed to swallow the contents of the cup. I asked the girl in front of me what they were.

"Vitamins." She said. "The green ones are the best." The girl before her called them magic vitamins. She told me to wait until nighttime to take them, otherwise "they turn off right when you need them to turn on." She didn't look like the other girls. She was much taller, and her skin was darker. She wore her hair differently than the rest of the girls with light skin. She said her name was Jolene.

Jolene was the girl yelling the bad words as I came in.

"Both your mommy and daddy dead?" She asked. She spoke a bit differently than the other girls, too. It was the first time I realized that I didn't have a mom or dad. I nodded.

"What's the last thing they said to you before they died?"

Close your eyes.

The last thing I remember about my mom was when she looked at me through the rear view mirror on New Circle Road, and told me to close my eyes.

"I don't remember." I told Jolene. She told me that someday I might remember, and if I did I should tell her.

I heard a crunch when Jolene took her vitamins. She chewed them, and crumpled the paper cup and dropped it on the counter in front of Mr. Ferguson when she was done.

It was my turn. I stepped up to the counter and was handed the paper cup with the two vitamins.

"Greens to even your disposition. Orange and brown is for building a strong body. Take em both." Mr. Ferguson said to me.

I examined the vitamins. They were two toned, one color on each end. They were big. When I put them in my mouth, they tasted horrible. But I managed to swallow them.

Those vitamins made me feel funny. I walked out of the cafeteria, but my feet stumbled over each other and I was dizzy. I grabbed something to hold on to, but it burned my hand. I accidentally grabbed the radiator. I looked down at my palm, but I couldn't focus on it. I leaned on a wall to try and stable myself. There was an old man mopping the floor in front of me, but I couldn't tell what he looked like because I was so dizzy.

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I went to lunch and sat across from Jolene. I lugged myself into the cafeteria chair. She was eying me as I sat down.

"I thought I told you to wait and take those vitamins at bedtime!" She must've been able to tell that I wasn't feeling good.  The sight of the mystery meat drowned in sauce that was on my plate, accompanied by peas and mashed potatoes, didn't help.

"What is this?" I asked her.

"Fish." The girl next to me, the one who called the vitamins magic vitamins, answered.

"Far as we know." Jolene added.

"We eat it every Friday. You gotta eat every bite, or they'll tell Mrs. Deardorff about you and you won't get adopted." The girl next to me said. I hadn't thought about being adopted. I was still trying to make sense of my new life. It didn't hit me that I was an orphan until then. I looked over at Mrs. Deardorff, eating her fish and potatoes. She was looking back at me. I stabbed a piece  of food with my fork and unwillingly put it into my mouth. It was not appealing.

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That night I didn't sleep well. It was my first night in my new bed, my first night trying to sleep in a room full of 20 other girls. I thought about my mom. We used to live in a trailer. I remember one night my dad came and found us. He spoke to my mom outside. He didn't seem happy with her. I watched silently through the window. No one except for him has ever called me Lizzie. When he left, he caught my eye and we looked at each other for a moment. That was the last I ever saw of him.

I stared up at the ceiling, watching the shadows of the trees sway gently. I wondered what it would've been like if I had known my dad.

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First part is done! Yay! I hope you enjoyed reading, because as a writer this was really fun to make. It's going to move a little slowly at first in order to really develop Beth's character and set the scene, especially while she's young. I tried to match the writing to what she would be feeling in the moment, like short choppy sentences that directly express the thought she's having. Jolene's POV during all this will be coming in the next part, so stay tuned for that. Ahh I'm so excited for this! Thank you so much for reading!

xx chummy <3

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