that one time you got jealous

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We weren't really dating. But we'd been calling each other long distance and I'd kind of talked about how I wanted to take you out. It was a couple of months after the whole Coldplay concert incident and I'd gone to this party. You'd gone back to Melbourne for the week and I guess I was kind of missing you. We weren't serious and to be honest I wasn't really deemed a serious person. But I wanted to be somewhat serious with you, Jay.

I ended up getting drunk. And high. And I think I took ecstasy that night. I ended up hooking up with this girl called Meg Wheeler. I'd gone to school with her since I was about ten and she was lovely and everything, don't get me wrong. I just- I'd never planned on fucking sleeping with her.

Anyway, some pictures of Meg and I making out got onto facebook and the next week when you were in town you came over to mine and confronted me. Only thing is, you were drunk as hell. I remember opening the door to my apartment and seeing you there, eyes red from lack of sleep, stumbling, barely able to stand on your own two feet.

"What the fuck, Cal." You'd groaned and pushed your way inside. I didn't really know what to say but you started ranting on about how I was a cheater and how I'd managed to sleep with this slut just to get at you and how I sucked because you liked me and I'd played with your feelings. I'd stayed silent, hell, you were drunk and had a better argument than me.

I tried explaining. You didn't really listen though, you just kind of told me to fuck off and you went outside. You managed to stumble out into the carpark where you sat on the hood of someone's car and tried to ignore me. I was angry now, it was stupid. You were drunk and I was trying to explain everything and you'd kind of just brushed me off.

I'd started yelling, saying something about how I didn't know how you expected me to explain myself if you didn't even listen to me. You kissed me. You were good at that. Kissing me when I started to get the slightest bit pissed off.

You held my jaw, your fingers brushing over my neck as we drunkenly kissed. Well, you drunkenly kissed. Although I have to admit you were better than most girls even when you were drunk. You smelt like cigarettes and fresh air, a smell that I'm not quite sure if I liked on you or not.

"Sorry for being jealous and pathetic." You'd murmured, pulling away and leaving me with closed eyes and parted lips. It took me a few seconds to realise that you'd already started making your way across the carpark, headed in the direction of Ashton's place just across town.

I insisted on you coming back to mine, I'd offered to sleep on the couch and everything. You'd mumbled something about Meg Wheeler and ignored me for the rest of the walk.

Ashton came outside when you clomped up the front steps, his voice thick from sleep, asking you where the hell you'd been. You'd just pointed at me and met my eyes, your bottom lip tucking itself between your two front teeth.

"What the hell were you guys doing?" He'd asked and I'd explained everything, leaving out the part about the kiss.

"Do you want a ride home or something?" He'd offered and I insisted that it was fine, turning on my heel before starting back towards my apartment block.

I remember mumbling to myself that night as I fell into bed "you'll be the fucking death of me, Jay."

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