Everything Changes // Fred Weasley

chapter 33: a lonely two weeks

April 8th-22nd, 1995

The two weeks that I spent alone at the castle were some of the longest weeks I had endured thus far in my life. Most of the professors took the break as an opportunity to visit family for the holiday, leaving me alone with the few who had stayed with nothing but my studies and my thoughts to occupy my time.

Luckily, I had an abundance of both.

I quickly developed a routine, not wanting to dwell on my thoughts for longer than needed. I woke up in the morning, took a shower, got dressed, and made my way down to the Great Hall for breakfast. There I would meet up with the few students who also were staying at the castle during break and we would eat together in silence, mostly because we didn't really know each other, but also because none of us had anything to talk about, our lives currently consisting of sitting in the common rooms doing absolutely nothing.

After breakfast, I would head back to my dorm and figure out a plan of action for my studies. I realized quickly that reading the textbooks wasn't good enough, and I needed to actually practice the magic I was reading about, but unfortunately I had yet to obtain a wand. Dumbledore promised he would have someone accompany me to Diagon Alley as soon as I got my parents' permission, but I knew that was never coming, so instead I practiced the spells with no wand at all, sometimes substituting my straightener or hairbrush as a stand-in, though I had no way of knowing if I was practicing them correctly or just creating muscle memory for the wrong movements.

Once I had decided which subjects I was going to be focusing on that day, I would collect the books that I needed and head to one of my designated study spots, whichever I was in the mood for that day. Sometimes it was the library, which was nice when I really needed to concentrate on something, like if I was studying History of Magic. I could never seem to remember the important dates, and it didn't help that the wizarding world used such strange names that I had never heard of before.

If I was focusing on an easier subject, like Care of Magical Creatures or Defense Against the Dark Arts, I would usually curl up in one of the armchairs by the fireplace in the Gryffindor common room. A few Gryffindors had stayed for the holiday, and they usually spent their time playing games or chatting in the common room. I didn't mind the noise. I didn't like how eerily quiet the castle was with everyone gone. Their excitement over trivial things made me feel a bit better about being there instead of being with Naomi at the Burrow.

When I was especially missing Fred, I would throw on his quidditch jersey he had given me and grab my blanket off of my bed before heading to our greenhouse, making sure to chat with Rosemary, Dahlia, and Violet before heading inside. Once inside I would lay out the blanket on the ground and lay on my back, facing the crystal ceiling above me, pretending like I was just waiting for Fred to meet me there after one of his many detentions.

Most days I would be so consumed with studying that I would forget to head back down to the Great Hall for lunch, but the ache in my stomach when dinner arrived would pull me out of my books, signifying that I had done enough work for the day. I would make my way down to the Great Hall once again and sit with the other students. They were always more talkative during dinner as they discussed their days. Some of them having actual stories that were exciting, like taking a walk around the lake and accidentally wandering into the forbidden forest for a few moments, while others discussed the new muggle book that their mum had sent them for the holiday.

I mostly just listened, chiming in every now and then with simple phrases to make them feel as if I was paying close attention to their stories.

I wasn't though. At least, most of the time.

By the time dinner rolled around, my brain felt heavy from all the information I had consumed during the day, but somehow, it still had enough room to worry. The excitement that had clouded my brain only days before when Dumbledore told me what he and the Ministry had been hiding from me had faded away, and now all of Naomi's questions and then some were flooding my brain, making it difficult to concentrate on anything until I got answers.