Wake of the Dead | Two

Chapter Forty-Nine | Killian

The soft thumping of grass beneath Jasper's feet was the only thing Killian managed to focus on. To avoid looking at the burning farmhouse, he pressed his face into Jasper's neck, sucking in a deep breath until his lungs couldn't hold any more, then letting it out with a slow sigh. The farmhouse had been the group's base for months. Why had this happened to it? Where were they going to go now? When the group had first moved into it, Killian hadn't felt safe there. It was a strange, alien environment. But now, he couldn't see it as anything other than his home.

The expressions on the rest of the groupmate's faces ranged from anger to grief. Killian wondered just how many possessions were left behind or forgotten. He was happy to say he'd gathered his and Jasper's things. There was only a single book he hadn't grabbed, making his stomach twist with guilt. Killian had found that book for Jasper at a gas station even before they'd gotten to the farmhouse. It was beyond him how something like a book could keep somebody entertained for hours, but it had definitely kept Jasper busy. "Hey Jasper," He mumbled. Killian knew there was no hiding from Jasper, the man would find out eventually anyways. "You remember that book I got you? I think...I think I forgot it on the bed stand."

"Killian," Jasper's tone didn't surprise Killian. His lover had always been patient and forgiving. Why would he have stopped anytime soon? But deep down, the paranoia that he'd make Jasper--or anybody--angry enough to hurt him was very real. That's what his father did, became infuriated by the simplest things and hurt Killian in his drunken stupor. Jasper was neither angry nor drunk. Killian hoped never to feel or experience the end of either. "I don't care about some book I've read several times over again. I care about you. You're safe," Killian felt Jasper's warm lips on his forehead and leaned into his partner's affection. "That's all that matters."

The crickets chirping in the night were far too cheerful for Killian to appreciate them like he normally would have. Why did the world dare to turn normally as his house burned down to the ground in nothing but a pile of lost memories and embers? There was no safety anymore, nothing to shield them from the biters or anything else that tried to harm them. There was only the darkness of night and the moon glowing high in the sky, the stars tauntingly winking at them from above. Killian clenched his fist, digging his nails in his palms so hard that it hurt. "This isn't fair." He murmured. Killian knew sentiments like that was childish, but he didn't care. He was too tired to care, too tired of running from everything, too tired of the people around him.

"Yea," Jasper replied. His voice was nothing but a quiet whisper, rumbling deep in his chest. Killian could feel the vibrations against his own chest, even on his face where he laid his head against his lover's neck. Some might not have seen that as comforting, but to Killian it was. In a way, it proved that Jasper was still there, still holding him. "I know it isn't, Boy Scout." Killian's heart fluttered when he heard that nickname. It was one he'd hated at first, one that he still pretended to hate, but he secretly loved it. "But it was bound to happen eventually. Maybe not this...dramatically. But we'd still have to move on."

Killian was reluctant to admit that Jasper was right. He wanted to believe there would be a place where he and Jasper could finally settle down and peacefully live the rest of their lives. But the more sensible side of him knew that would more than likely never happen. Not until they were dead and maybe met up if there was some sort of afterlife. That was a whole other topic though, one he was too exhausted to entertain. "I just wish it didn't have to happen so soon."

"Me neither." There was something else in Jasper's tone that Killian couldn't quite discern. He narrowed his brows a bit, frowning. Was Jasper hiding something from him? If he was, then what was it? The somber air that clung around his lover worried Killian. It was almost as if he were mourning something, but what, he didn't know. A sickening twist in his belly brought forth annoyance, in turn making Killian tighten his grip around Jasper's shoulders. They'd never really kept anything from one another since they became an official couple. So why was Jasper starting now?